


Against Her Will

by FBLayla11



Category: Southern Vampire Mysteries - Charlaine Harris
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-22
Updated: 2012-06-23
Packaged: 2017-11-08 06:52:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 17
Words: 50,899
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/440371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FBLayla11/pseuds/FBLayla11
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After repeatedly spurning the advances of Bill Compton, Sookie is turned against her will. Sookie decides to fight back the only way she knows how. Perhaps Eric Northman will be able to help her. This is definitely an AU and the characters are OOC.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Date Me

It was another rowdy Friday night at Merlotte’s. I promised myself that as soon as I saved up enough money, I was going to quit my waitressing gig and go to college. I dreamt of being a normal twenty one year old college student, hanging out with my girlfriends, pulling all-nighters, dating frat boys and most of all I wanted to study psychology. It was sort of a determined passion of mine to try to solve the mystery of my own disability. I had so many dreams, but unfortunately, I had been stuck in a reality that did not toe the line with those dreams. 

“Hi Sweetheart, can I get an O?” Bill Compton, resident vampire, asked. He was the only vampire I’d ever met and the only one in Bon Temps. He had lived there for about 2 years now and most all of the locals had reluctantly accepted him.

I met him two years ago when he moved into the old Compton property that was situated across the cemetery from my house. He had introduced himself to gran and I the night he moved in. He seemed friendly enough and got along with gran spectacularly. They had the civil war in common. Gran had ultimately asked him to speak at her Civil War remembrance club called the Descendants of the Glorious Dead. Bill had agreed to speak to her club, but I suspect it was just to get into my good graces.  
Bill had probably asked me out on dates hundreds of times since we met. At first, gran had encouraged me to go out with him, but I just never felt that spark of attraction to him. I thought he was a nice man, if not a gentleman, but he just really wasn’t my type. It’s actually kind of funny, I didn’t even realize I had a type until I met him.  
I’m not exactly experienced in the dating department, in fact I had probably only been out on a handful of dates. It’s not because of a lack of suitors; it’s mainly because I couldn’t stand to hear their thoughts. Most men think about sex about every six seconds and it’s especially annoying when they think about my breasts, or how they picture my lips on their cocks. The images they unknowingly projected at me were beyond X rated, in fact they sometimes verged on the criminal. 

I went behind the bar to grab Bill his TruBlood as I walked back towards his table to drop it off, it was realy all I could do from blocking out Jason’s friends. They were thinking about how perky my breasts were and they wish I would put a little more bounce in my step so my breasts would jiggle. Typical horny male thoughts.  
“Here you are, let me know if I can get you anything else.” I said as I placed the TruBlood on Bill’s table. To be honest, it was a relief to be around Bill because it gave me a reprieve from the vile thoughts of the bar patrons. I couldn’t hear vampires at all and I also couldn’t read Sam as well either. I asked him about that once and he reluctantly explained to me it was because he was a shifter. 

“Sookie, I have tickets to the Phantom of the Opera I for tomorrow night. I was wondering if you would join me?” Bill asked in his most genteel cool southern voice.

I was tempted to agree if only to get out of the house, but I had already agreed to work for Arlene. I had kind of become a hermit since gran dies last year. The only social interaction I really ever had was at Merlotte’s. But I in the end decided that I couldn’t go back on my word to Arlene and declined his offer.

“Sorry Bill, I am working tomorrow.” I started to say something about a raincheck, but I just didn’t want to commit to something I may or may not be willing to follow through with.  
“Some other time then.” Bill said coolly. I didn’t agree are acknowledge his statement, I simply walked away attending to my other tables. 

About an hour later, Bill left the bar, leaving a pretty hefty tip. I finished my closing duties and stayed awhile just shooting the shit with Sam. 

I really admired Sam, he was the kind of guy any girl would love to marry. He was financially stable, extremely good looking, loyal, smart, and very nice. I would love to have dated him if it weren’t for the fact that he was my boss. To be honest, I had quite the crush on him, but I never led on so I doubt he ever knew. I had fantasized having a future with him, children, and picket fences the whole nine yards. I thought maybe once I quit the waitressing gig, I could maybe date him. 

“Sam, I really appreciate your friendship these past years. You were always there for me when no one else was.” I said. I don’t know why, but in that particular moment I was feeling incredibly nostalgic. 

“Oh Cher, you know you are a very special person. You deserve so much more than a waitressing gig at a dive bar in a backwater Louisiana town.” Sam said. The look in his eyes was that of regret, hopefulness and a slight hint of desire. It was almost as if he was telling me that he wished he could make all my dreams come true with just his words.  
“Well, goodnight Sam.” I placed a small kiss on his cheek as I walked out the door. I had never really done that before, but I always wanted to. In fact I wanted to do a lot more and had fantasized about it on more than one occasion. 

I walked out of the employee entrance and into my little Honda Civic. It wasn’t the nicest car, but it was reliable and I was proud because I saved up for a long time to be able to buy the 4 year old car. 

I hopped in the car and drove home. All I could think about was how close I was to reaching my savings goal to be able to go to college. I only needed to save about $3,000 more dollars and I could quit and go to school. Of course I would still need to take out some student loans, but I had all the paperwork filled out and ready to go. I would probably be only another month, and then I could sign up for the Fall Semester at LSU in Baton Rouge. 

As I pulled in to the drive, I noticed Bill sitting on my porch. This was an unusual visit since I had seen him only hours ago. 

“Bill, what are you doing here?” I said quizzically.

“Sookie, why won’t you go out with me?” He asked stoically. I could tell that something was amiss about his demeanor, but what happened next is something that I will never forget as long as I exist.


	2. Drain You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains graphic violence and rape.

“We’re friends Bill, why can’t we leave it at that?” I had always thought of Bill as a friend and I just wasn’t attracted to him that way, but there was no way I was going to say that. I knew what he was capable of, and I really didn’t want to piss him off. 

“Sookie, I am a patient vampire, and I have waited two years for you to come around, but I have lost my patience. You will be mine. “Bill’s eyes were dilated, and he radiated pure evil. I had never been as frightened in my life. I knew, in that moment, that if I couldn’t escape him, I would die.

I started to run towards my door. I knew that if I could just break through the threshold of my house, I could rescind his invitation. Vampires are extremely fast, and I really stood no chance. Bill was in front of me before I could even get 2 feet away from him. Bill grabbed me and put his hand over my mouth. I fought him as hard as humanly possible, scratching, punching, and flailing against him, but it was useless. Vampires are infinitely stronger than even the strongest of humans. 

As he drug me back to his house, I fought, and fought. If I was going to die, I was going down fighting. Through all this Bill said absolutely nothing. I knew that he was about to kill me, but I still thought about how I could escape his grasp. As soon as he put me down I had planned to grab the nearest tree branch and use it as a makeshift stake. Of course my plan was all dependent on having the slightest chance to escape his grasp. That never happened.

He never let me loose, as he brought me into his home, and my chances of survival were slim and none. I knew that, so I just began to cry and pray. I prayed to God to protect me from the evil that was Bill Compton. I prayed for a guardian angel to swoop in and save me. I prayed for a miracle.   
Bill carried me upstairs and threw me down on top of his bed. As he started to rip off my clothes, I panicked. I was still a virgin, and even though I was about to die, I didn’t want to die after being raped. 

The somber décor of the room was sadly appropriate for the situation I found myself in. I begged him to stop. I told him anything and everything I thought he wanted to hear just to get out of the situation. Still he said absolutely nothing. It was so eerie to see how cold and calculating he was. 

He ripped off my clothes and took off his pants. I could do nothing but flail my arms and legs, sob and beg him to stop. But, as he entered me, the only thing I could do was cry, I stopped flailing my arms and legs because it only seemed to excite him more which caused him to thrust and pound me harder increasing the pain I felt. He put his hand over my mouth, I guess he didn’t want to hear me yelling at him to stop any longer. 

He was violent and unrelenting with me. Thrust after thrust, he pounded me so hard that I thought for certain that he had broken my pelvis. I knew I had bruises, because he grabbed my arms and thighs and breasts so hard. It was the most pain I had ever experienced in my life.   
Unfortunately sexual abuse was nothing new to me. As a child I was repeatedly molested by my great uncle Bartlett. I had learned early on that fighting an abuser was useless, because it only fanned the flames of their sick sexual fantasies. 

As Bill came inside me, he bit my neck so violently, that I almost passed out. He drank from me greedily. Pull after pull I could feel my body parts go numb, and then the light headedness crept in, then total and complete darkness.

OOOOOoooOOOooOOO

It was the oddest sensation, cold, smooth, dirt. I was hungry, but I was in the ground covered by dirt. I had a moment of sheer panic as I dug through the dirt trying to reach for air. I knew I was alive, or at least I thought I was, but I didn’t understand what happened, or how I got there. As I dug myself out I felt a cool hand entwine my fingers. The cold hand helped pull me to the surface. 

I was dirty, hungry and desperately confused. I stood stark naked covered in dirt in front of a man I recognized as Bill gasping unnecessarily for breath. I didn’t understand what was happening and had no memories. The last thing I remembered was sitting in Sam’s office talking about our lives. 

“I..I’m so hungry. What happened?” I asked pathetically. I needed a shower and I wanted to eat a piece of grans pecan pie and go to bed. 

“Drink this. And I will explain.” Bill said coldly as he shoved a bottle of Trublood in my hand. The stuff tasted vile, but at the moment I didn’t care, it was satiating my hunger.  
“You have been made vampire, my vampire. You are my child, my companion, mine.” Bill said. What?! I was a vampire? How the hell did that happen? I started thinking hard and all the memories came flooding in. Bill had kidnapped, raped and turned me. What the fuck! Feeling beyond hurt, desperate, despaired and overwhelmed, I started to cry. When I went to wipe my tears away, I noticed that my hands were bloodied. 

“You will stop crying this moment.” Bill commanded. I wanted to run away from him and crawl into the safety of my house, my bed. I wanted gran to come and hold me and tell me everything was going to be alright. I wanted to kill Bill Compton. Instead I felt an innate compulsion to stop crying.

“You will not run from me, you will not talk back to me. You will only speak when spoken to and you will do everything I say.” Again Bill commanded. Apparently he was setting down the ground rules. I tried to defy him by running away, but I felt that I physically couldn’t. 

“You will subsist on TruBlood and TruBlood only. You are never to leave my house unless you are accompanied by me.”

In that moment I felt total and utter dejection. In that moment I knew that I didn’t want to live, exist or whatever it was that I was doing any longer. I would stake myself if I had to.   
I never wanted to be a vampire, in fact I always thought that was a fate worse than death. And now not only was I one, but my maker was an evil monster who was going to enslave and abuse me.


	3. Days of the Week

It had been months since that fateful night that my malevolent maker turned me. Bill and I sort of settled into a routine. Bill would rise about an hour before me. He would sadistically have sex with me in whatever position or manner that suited him.

Somedays he would demand I take him in my mouth, other days he would violently enter me from my rear entrance. He really didn’t care if I was prepared for him or if I took pleasure in our activities, which I absolutely did not.

In fact I never, ever had an orgasm, I refused. I felt that if I did he would win. I would never give him the satisfaction of knowing that he gave me any pleasure. It was sort of a sick game we would play with each other. He would rise, fuck me, he would feed on a human in front of me while I sipped TruBlood. Then he would go to work on some computer project the Queen ordered him to do, while I would sit in front of him and watch.

I decided very early on that I would not fight him; I would obey him and earn his trust. I figured if I could earn his trust then maybe he would allow me out of the house by myself. And of course if I could get away from him for even just a moment, I would either escape him or kill myself.

After about a month of our appalling routine, I had convinced him to allow me to read books and write in a journal while he worked on his database. Bill reluctantly agreed, but stipulated that he would choose the books I read and he would read everything I wrote in my journal. The books he chose were only those educational in nature, I was never allowed to read fiction. I don’t know what his trepidations were about fiction, but whatever.

The more real world knowledge I had the better off I was. I was allowed to read books about astronomy, geology, medicine, journalism etc. It was actually nice to be able to self-educate seeing as how my dreams of going to college had been dashed that fateful night. I found the Journalism textbooks very interesting. His foolish choices in my reading material were ultimately going to be his downfall. He should have just let me read the trashy romance novels that I used to love so much.

I had come up with a brilliant plan. I knew that the AVL coveted their reputation that vampires were not a threat to humans. The AVL protected that reputation fiercely, so if I could somehow get my story out to the media, the public would be outraged and the AVL would have to punish Bill for turning me against my will among his other crimes. Bill was always very involved in his computer project, so he rarely paid me any attention.I took that opportunity to write a letter describing the events of that fateful night.

_**To the Editor: My name is Sookie Stackhouse and I was turned against my will. I live in a small Louisiana town called Bon Temps. I, like most 21 years old women, had many dreams. Dreams to be educated, to get married, to raise a family, to have a home, and grow old surrounded by lots of grandchildren. Regrettably those dreams were shattered the night William Compton kidnapped me, raped me, and turned me against my will. While I don’t believe all vampires are as evil as William Compton, the fact remains that I am forced by magical compulsion to abide by every sick demand he makes of me. I live every day in fear, isolation, and despair, forced into an existence that I never wanted for myself at the side of a criminal who abuses me daily. I want my story to be shared with the public as an ill-fated tale of a young woman whose dreams have been turned into a living nightmare.** _

Knowing that Bill would read my journal at the end of the night, I quietly ripped the page and folded it, and stuffed it in my underwear. I wrote out another superficial journal entry about how I was growing to like Bill and hoped that he would trust me.

I wrote lies in my journal every day, in the hopes that he would start trust me a little more. All I needed was for him to give me enough trust so that he would allow me to start helping him with the mailing of his computer database to his customers. He had hired an assistant to come to the house every other day to mail merge the new customers’ addresses and mail out the disks. If I could just convince him that I could do that job for free, I could sneak in my letter and send it to the media.

I knew that if the media got ahold of my story, the AVL would be forced to do damage control. I also knew that there was a slight chance that their damage control could possible entail destroying me, getting rid of the evidence. In my mind it was win-win. I would be free of Bill one way or another, either they would kill me, or kill Bill and show the public that I had been rescued. It was genius if I do say so myself. I just needed to get him to trust me.

Another month passed, and I obediently followed our routine. Sheriff Dearborn and Sam stopped by a few times questioning Bill about my disappearance. Each time, Bill would hide me in our daytime resting place, while he convinced the Sheriff and Sam that he had not seen me. It brought me comfort to know that I was missed by someone.

When Bill would get visitors asking about my disappearance, he would get angry, very angry. He would always take it out on me, punishing me in some humiliating fashion. I was never allowed to wear clothes except the days his employee would come by to mail the disks. I only drank TruBlood. Bill would often lace the TruBlood with tomato juice which would make me violently ill. I was required to shower 3 times a night, once when I rose, after he had his way with me, and before I went to bed for the day.

He would rarely speak to me, which was fine by me; it allowed me to plan my subsequent freedom. I had stashed the letter to the editor under a floorboard, so that he would never find it. He eventually allowed me to take over the mailing duties. He also gave me access to a spare laptop, but he told me that he would be monitoring my browsing activities. I was not allowed access to email, message boards, social networks, or any other site that interacted with others. I somehow convinced him to allow me to visit news media websites under the guise that I should keep up with the current events. In actuality, I visited the websites of the news outlets I planned to send my letter to in order to get the addresses of the editors. Newsweek, USA Today, NY Times, Washington Post, The Times-Picayune, and The Shreveport Times, were my intended targets. I figured at least one of the outlets would pick up on my story.

I memorized the addresses to their editors, but I did not let on to Bill that I had any ill intentions. I dutifully mailed his disks to the new subscribers. I let this routine go on for another month. Finally the day arrived; it was time to execute my plan. I had secretly been making copies of my letter. Only one at a time so he wouldn’t become suspicious. I would also steal one stamp a week until I had enough. Bill was busy working on the database as usual and was not paying me any attention. I stuffed, labeled and affixed stamps to all of my letters. I slipped the letters in between the outgoing disks. He trusted me enough to allow me to walk the letters out to the mailbox, but I had to do it every day at 3 AM.

There was never anyone around the house, but he figured 3AM was the best time to ensure that I was never detected. It only took me 10 seconds to run out to the mailbox and back anyway, and he timed me too. I had to calm myself and make sure that he could not detect anything was different in my feelings, so I subdued my nerves. It was done, I had mailed my letters. Now all I had to do was wait and hope that my story was newsworthy.


	4. Don't Waste Your Heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EPOV

I was sitting in my office at Fangtasia. I had just finished my weekly report to the Queen, and was just about to start ordering the liquor for the month when Pam walked in my office.

“Eric, The Queen is on line one for you.” Pam said. Shit what the fuck did the Queen want? More tribute? I fucking hate dealing with her, she‘s the fucking bane of my existence, and a lunatic to boot. 

“Majesty, it is always a pleasure, what can I do for you this evening?” A little ass kissing goes a long way with this megalomaniac. 

“Sheriff, You are aware of the article that the Times-Picayune is running tomorrow, are you not?” I own 15 businesses and oversee the wellbeing of over 250 subjects, like I have fucking time to follow the goings on of the New Orleans politics.

“No Majesty, I am not familiar.” I said disdainfully. 

“There is a vampire in your area that has apparently turned a young woman against her will. She was sexually assaulted prior to her turning as well.” Queen Sophie-Anne stated as if there was nothing wrong with this type of behavior.

“This is not good, but I fail to see how this pertains to the newspaper.” I stated.

“Well Sheriff, this creative young woman somehow managed to write a letter to the editor explaining her situation. The Times has decided to run this on the front page. “She stated flatly.

“This sounds like an issue the AVL should handle.” I said. Really, do I have to handle every crisis for her. 

“That is why I am calling you Sheriff, The AVL is going to raid Mr. Compton’s home tomorrow and retrieve the girl. She is only about 4 months old, so she will need the influence and direction of a good maker. This is going to be a matter of public opinion, the AVL has asked that she be overseen by someone with a good public image.” 

I didn’t like the direction of this conversation. I am a good and fair maker, but I had no intentions of carrying such a responsibility again, at least not for another 500 years or so. I already have Pam, who by all standards is a great vampire. 

“I have volunteered you for this task Sheriff, and the AVL has agreed.” The Queen said.

FUCK! I fucking knew it. Yes, it was terrible what happened to this girl, but almost all vampires turned prior to the Great Revelation were turned against their will. However, the sexual abuse is not honorable, even for vampires. This girl is going to be damaged and wretched, and will most likely take up a lot of my time. 

“Yes your majesty. When do I take possession of the girl?” I asked. There was no point in arguing the matter; I would take on this task much like I do all other obstacles that are thrown my way. 

“You will accompany the AVL’s raid tomorrow and the girl will come home with you. You must do everything in your power to make this girl happy. She will most likely have the press all over her asking for interviews, and the last thing the AVL wants is for her to claim that she is still being abused.” 

“Yes your majesty, she will be well cared for. “ Any child of mine, whether by blood or…adoption, will always be taken care of and want for nothing.

As my call with the Queen ended, I had a lot of preparations to make.

“Pam! Get in here.” 

“Yes Eric.”

“You need to go shopping for a young woman. Get all the beauty products and anything else you think a young female vampire might need. I do not know her dress or shoe size, so that will have to wait. I also want you to prepare one of my guest bedrooms for her. This girl is to be treated as if she were the Queen of Fucking England. This needs to be done tonight.” This girl is already trouble, but I know Pam will handle the situation. 

“Eric what is this all about? A new woman in your life?” She said sarcastically.

“No, she is your new adopted sister. She was sexually abused and turned against her will by fucking Compton.” Now that I think about it, Pam is going to be a great role model for this young girl. Pam herself was almost raped the night I met her. I took great pleasure in ripping the heads off of the animals that attacked her that night. I turned Pam the next night, but I never asked her if that is what she wanted. As it turns out she was grateful that I turned her. She once told me she felt like she was made to be a vampire, and I had to agree. 

“Compton raped her? What a fucking vile piece of shit! Eric, how did you find this out and what will happen to Compton?” Pam asked. I could tell that she could already relate to this girl. This situation may work out better than I initially thought. 

“Yes, Pam. The girl wrote a letter to the editor of the Times-Picayune detailing her ordeal. The article is running on the front page tomorrow and the AVL is moving in to apprehend Compton and the girl is going to be placed under my protection.” The more I think about this situation, the more I realized that this young woman is going to have to be dealt with very carefully as my ass is on the line. I really don’t need any bad press and I sure as hell don’t need the Queen on my ass either. 

I wanted to do a little recon for myself, so I decided to fly over to Compton’s shithole out in Bon Temps. The irony of this situation is that I know for a fact that he has been working directly for the Queen for years now. His database has actually made my area significantly more profitable. But after this article is published tomorrow, I am almost positive that he is going to be meeting his final death.

I flew over the Compton farmhouse, to scope out the area. He lived out in the woods, the only thing even remotely close to his home was a small old cemetery and another abandoned Farm House. I landed in his front lawn and peered through his window. 

His home was in significant disrepair and looked like it still had his human wife’s original decorations. It was a sad, decrepit old place. I saw Compton working feverishly on his computer. About 3 feet away from him sat a beautiful blonde woman. She was stark fucking naked. This must be the woman who wrote the article I thought. Not allowing her to wear any clothing is a typical punishment that sadistic fucking vampires inflict on their pets. I never would have humiliated Pam in that manner. I’m positive that whatever this woman has written in the article are one hundred percent accurate. 

I found that I could not take my eyes off of her. She was really lovely. About 5’5 curvy in all the right places, long blonde hair, and she had the most beautiful breasts I had ever seen. As I stood there ogling her, I felt her eyes meet mine for just a split second. Her eyes were a beautiful shade of ocean blue, deep and wrought with emotion.

In the split second our eyes met, I could see the sadness and despair in them and I wanted nothing more than to bust down Compton’s door and take her in my arms that second. She looked utterly broken, but yet there was still fight left in her. I know a warrior when I see one, and this young vampire was definitely a fighter a survivor, much like myself.  
I felt an overwhelming urge to protect the beautiful girl. Until tomorrow young one, I thought. She will be mine tomorrow and she will never have to suffer any longer.   
The young girl glanced back at the window where I stood one more time. This time she looked right at me and gave me a slight dejected smiled. I knew that she saw me, so I had to leave before Compton caught on. 

Until tomorrow young one, you will be safe once again.


	5. Don't Stop Believing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EPOV

As I picked up the Times-Picayune, I saw her face. The newspaper managed to find an old picture of her. It looked as though it was her high school yearbook picture. She was gorgeous, as I suspected, blonde hair, icy blue eyes. She was wearing some kind of graduation cap that took away from her natural beauty. The article read:

 

_**Bon Temps Woman Suffers at the Hands of Vampire Captor** _

**My name is Sookie Stackhouse and I was turned against my will. I live in a small Louisiana town called Bon Temps. I, like most 21 years old women, had many dreams. Dreams to be educated, to get married, to raise a family, to have a home, and grow old surrounded by lots of grandchildren. Regrettably those dreams were shattered the night William Compton kidnapped me, raped me, and turned me against my will. While I don’t believe all vampires are as evil as William Compton, the fact remains that I am forced by magical compulsion to abide by every sick demand he makes of me. I live every day in fear, isolation, and despair, forced into an existence that I never wanted for myself at the side of a criminal who abuses me daily. I want my story to be shared with the public as an ill-fated tale of a young woman whose dreams have been turned into a living nightmare.**

**  
**

I was taken aback by her cleverness and honesty. This woman knew exactly what she was doing, she knew how to garner the public sympathy. I had the distinctive feeling that this was all a very well thought out escape plan on her part. Sookie. What an odd name. I had never encountered anyone by that name. The article said that she was 21 years of age and from Bon Temps. I found myself oddly excited to meet this shrewd young woman.

The plan was to raid Compton’s place at 11 P.M, I was to meet the AVL reps at Fangtasia at 10 to go over the plan again. Once Compton is apprehended he will immediately be taken into custody which all will be video recorded, of course. Then I will bring Sookie to my home and brief her on the situation and make her comfortable.

I had Pam go and buy some basic clothes for her. Judging by her picture and what I saw last night, I guessed that she was probably a size six and a luscious 34 DD. Other than that, my home was all ready for her.

I went to my office to finish ordering the liquor and finish some other area business. By the time I was finished with my work, it was already 10 o’clock and the AVL had begun filing in the club.

“Good Evening Nan.” I said. Nan Flanigan was the face of the AVL. She was paid an inordinate amount money to give interviews and public appearances promoting vampires.

“Evening Sheriff. You have a great responsibility to this girl and to the vampire reputation as a whole. Don’t fuck it up.” She stated directly.

No fucking shit. I am well aware of what is on the line if this girl isn’t happy. I nodded in agreement, and proceeded to the meeting .

“The Plan is simple.” Nan began. “We knock down the door, arrest Compton, and escort the girl away. We must make sure that she is properly introduced to the Sheriff and the situation is explained to her. She will be under the protection of Sheriff Northman who will become her maker by proxy. “ Nan Finished. And with that, the meeting had ended.

I went to my office to grab some Fangtasia clothing for the girl. I was almost 100% sure that she would be naked and as an added bonus it will also serve as a shameless plug for the club, you know since the cameras will be there and all.

I left Pam in charge of the club, and got into my Corvette and went on my way to Bon Temps. The drive would only take me about 15 minutes, and I found myself nervous to meet her. I prayed to the gods that she was not too damaged. Seeing her morose smile last night, I somehow get the feeling that she will heal. I firmly believed that she is a strong woman who fought through her hardships.

We parked a little ways away from the Compton home, so as not to draw too much attention to our plans. The raid only took about a minute. The AVL knocked down his door and apprehended Compton, which was not difficult. He didn’t even try to put up a fight.

Just as I thought, Sookie was stark naked, so I rushed to her side to cover her body. Generally, vampires are not modest by any means, but she is a baby vampire who most likely still maintains her human reticences, on top of that this was all being recorded.

I quickly threw the Fangtasia shirt over her head and said. “I am Sheriff Northman, and you, my dear, are now under my protection. You are safe now.”

I stood protectively by her side while Nan explained the situation to her.

“So, I am going to stay with the Sheriff?” Sookie asked meekly.

“Yes, Sookie, you will come home with me. I have everything ready for you.” I said I could feel her trepidations about coming home with me. So I thought I should head off her fears.

“Sookie, believe me, you are safe now. I will teach you the proper ways of the vampires. I will take on the role of your maker. I will protect you and in return I expect nothing but loyalty.”

She seemed to relax a little bit at my words. I escorted her to my car and gave her the sweatpants that I brought. I wanted her to be comfortable with me. She didn’t say anything to me the whole way home. I knew this would all be a shock for her, I didn’t expect her to be comfortable with me immediately, but I hoped she would be able to at least relax.

She finally broke her silence, “What are they going to do to him?” She asked timorously.

“He is in the custody of the AVL. In a week he will face a trial where he will most likely be sentenced to death. Since the humans will be aware of his punishment, he will most likely be… euthanized. “ I said honestly.

She didn’t say anything, she just nodded in acceptance. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that she will most likely suffer pain as her maker suffers as he is killed. I decided that I will just stand by her and help her endure it as much as possible.

As we pulled in to my driveway, the look on her face was cute. I could tell that she was impressed by my home.

“Let’s go in Sookie and I will show you to your room.”

I escorted her into my home, and gave her the tour. The tour was quite extensive, as my home is a three story McMansion complete with 5 bedrooms, 4 bathrooms, 2 offices/library, a media room, pool, hot tub, and of course my own private underground suite.

“This is your room, there are some clothes and undergarments for you in the closet. You have your own private bathroom.”

She seemed appreciative, but apprehensive at the same time. I don’t think she has ever had anyone provide for her.

“Sookie, can you sit for a minute, there are some ground rules that we need to go over.”

I could tell she was just waiting for the other shoe to drop, but of course, I would never hurt her.

“As your Maker by proxy, I am asking you not to leave this house without either myself or my other child Pam, who you will meet tomorrow. Also, the only people allowed in our home is me, you and Pam. I ask you to please not tell anyone where we live. It is a matter of safety for both of us. You are welcomed to anything in the home. Do you understand Sookie?” I asked.

She hasn’t spoken very much since we met and I was beginning to worry about her.

“Yes Sheriff.” She replied.

“Please call me Eric. Have you fed today?” I asked. She looked really pale and her cheeks were slightly sunken in. If I had to guess I would say she hasn’t fed in weeks.

“I haven’t fed for 3 days.” She replied sullenly.

“Okay, I will get you a TruBlood for now, then when we go to Fangtasia tomorrow, I will get you a donor.”

“A, uh, human donor?” she replied quizzically.

“Yes, Sookie, you can pick whoever you like.” The look on her face was that of confusion.

“Uh, Eric, I’ve never, uh, done that before.” She said.

What the fuck! She has never fed from a human! No wonder she looks so pale.

“Sookie, vampires cannot subsist strictly on TruBlood, despite what the AVL says. You need to feed on a human at least once every 4-5 months or else you will become very weak. I will teach you how to feed tomorrow, but for now let’s go grab a TruBlood, and if you feel like talking, we can talk.”

I was full of rage, thinking of how fucking neglectful Compton was. He has no business being a maker, especially not to this beauty. We made our way to the kitchen and I heated up two TruBloods. We sat at the table, and I could see that she was nervous, she looked like a fish out of water.

“Whenever you are ready to talk about what happened to you, I want you to know that I will be here for you.” I tried to comfort her the best that I could. I’m not the best at dealing with emotions, particularly emotional women.

“Thanks Eric.” Was all she said. I knew that she just needed some time to trust me and become comfortable with me.


	6. Don't Know Why

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

It felt bizarre rising in an unfamiliar place, but strangely for the first time in over four months, I felt safe. I don’t know why I felt so safe, I didn’t know anything about the Sheriff or his child, and I certainly didn’t trust either of them.

I knew that I had to feed on a human for the first time tonight, and I was extremely nervous about it. I was certainly afraid of hurting the donor or worse. Even though I was made vampire over four months ago, I made the conscious decision that I was not going to change who I was despite the abusive situation I was in. I was still the same Sookie Stackhouse that gran raised, and I was not going to change my morals or beliefs just because my inherent nature had changed or because Bill had tried to break me.

I got out of bed and decided that I needed a long, hot shower. Luckily, there was already bath soaps and shampoo there for me. It seems that Eric had gone out of his way to make me comfortable, although I can’t say that this made me feel that way entirely, but it was a small gesture that didn’t go unnoticed.

The shower was exactly what I needed. I needed to relax and de-stress as much as I possibly could. I couldn’t relax completely, because I could still feel my maker. I could feel his pain and his emotions. He was exceedingly angry with me and my little publicity stunt. He was also in physical pain, from the silver restraints I can only assume he was confined in. I tried to shut the bond as much as I possibly could, which wasn’t very effective due to my age.

I finished my shower and changed into some clothes that had been left in my closet for me. There were a variety of sizes in the closet, so I chose a pair of jeans and a black spaghetti strapped tank top.  I put on some sandals and went downstairs.

“Good Evening Sookie.” Eric said as he smiled at me. I didn’t notice last night, perhaps because I had other things on my mind, but he really was a truly beautiful man. 6’4, blonde hair to match my own, muscular, and his cerulean eyes were so majestic that you felt special each time he looked at you.

“Good Evening Eric.” I said cautiously. I admittedly stared at him for a tad longer than the norm, he was just so beautiful.

“We will leave for Fangtasia, if you are ready.” He said. I nodded my head indicating that I was in fact ready to leave.

The short ride to his club was nerve racking, and we didn’t speak the entire time. This was the first time in months that I actually gotten out in public to see people, and experience life outside of my maker’s grasp. I was anxious to see how my shields would hold up, as I haven’t practiced them in a while.

As Eric parked in the back of his club, he turned off the engine and stared at me for a good minute before he spoke.

“This is my club. I along with my child Pam own it. You will be expected to work here as well. Do not be nervous, I am going to introduce you as my newest child. I know Compton was an incompetent maker to you, but I need you to understand that you must show the utmost respect to all vampires in the club especially towards me. Do you understand?” Eric said sternly. I nodded at him that I understood.

Anytime he explained vampire rules to me he always finished with ‘Do you understand?’ as if I wasn’t the dumb cousin. I know I haven’t spoken to him much, so maybe he just thinks I’m some kind of backwoods idiot. It started to irritate me a little, but I didn’t show it in the slightest.

He held my hand as he escorted me into his office. His office was not what I had expected, with him being the Sheriff and all. It was cluttered, with boxes and stacks of paper all over, his desk was atrocious. I thought it odd that there was a bottle of whiskey and a bottle of Tabasco sauce on his desk. Why would a vampire need whiskey and Tabasco sauce? He also had a large black leather sofa that looked incredibly inviting.

I decided to take a seat on the sofa and wait until Eric gave me instructions to do otherwise. A tall reddish blonde haired woman walked in his office like she owned the place.

“Is this my new sister Eric?” she said bluntly. I assumed this was Pam, as she called me her sister. She was wearing this offensive black getup that was so tight I could see each d every contour on her body.

“Yes, Pam. This is Sookie Stackhouse. She is your new sister and my child. I will leave you two for a few moments to get to know each other.” Eric said and he got up from his desk and walked out of his office.

“So Sookie, you know Eric is a very powerful vampire and he has a reputation for being a good master. It is in your best interest to trust him absolutely and with your undead life. I know you have been through some traumatic experiences in your short life, but believe me Eric is nothing like Compton. He is a good and fair vampire. But let me warn you if you do anything to compromise his station, you will wish you were back with Compton.” Pam said menacingly.  I could tell that she was trying to lay down the ground rules for our new relationship. I could also tell that her loyalties were now and always would be to Eric and I would come in a very very distant second or third.

I didn’t say anything in response to her rant, I just nodded in acceptance. Silence seemed to be work tremendously effectively as a defense mechanism.  I sat on the couch in a very unassuming way, with my legs crossed and my eyes focused directly at the floor. I know that being as young as I am, I basically have no rights and am forced to be submissive to damn near every vampire, which is totally against the Sookie Stackhouse axiom. I decided a long time ago that I had to pick and choose my battles and this was definitely not one of them.

“Well that was a good talk Sookie, you have such a brilliant personality.” She said sarcastically as she got off the couch and left the office.

Pam had turned out to be quite insufferable, but if she was trying to scare me, she had another thing coming. I had survived much worse than her.

Eric came back into the office with two women in tow. They looked like they had been rode hard and put away wet. I could hear from their thoughts that they were hoping to have a threesome with Eric.

It had been a long time since I actually heard the thoughts of humans. Being holed up with my maker for months, I was seriously out of practice with my shields. For a long time, I didn’t even know if my telepathy had carried over to my new vampire existence, but the day that Sheriff Dearborn and Sam came by Bill’s house, I knew that I was still telepathic.

Bill never knew about my telepathy and I wanted to keep it that way. I certainly didn’t tell Eric, although I suspect that I might have to tell him soon, especially if I am to work at this bar every day.

“Sookie, I have brought in two donors for you, but I want you to drink a bottle of TruBlood first.” Eric said as he handed me a bottle of TruBlood. I gulped down the TruBlood, it really didn’t taste that bad to me. Bill would never touch the stuff, saying that it tasted like metal, but I found that it tasted more like a daily vitamin.

“Good, now I want you to find her pulse point.” Eric said as he shoved the brunette in front of me. She was pretty in a sad kind of way, she had no self-respect and her sense of self-worth was nil.  I instantly felt bad taking her blood.

“See Sookie, there is one here.” Eric said pointing to her neck.

“And another here.” Pointing to her wrist.

“Another here.” Pointing to her upper arm

“And here.” Pointing to femoral artery. I felt uncomfortable to the nth degree with that particular pulse point and the suggestive way in which he was pointing to it.

“Here.” He pointed his finger behind her knee.

“And here.” He lifted the woman’s leg and pointed to the top of her foot.

“The easiest is obviously the neck or wrist, but the most pleasurable is the thigh.” He said as be brushed his lips across each of the body parts he referenced. This was starting to take on a definite sexual tenor, which I was uncomfortable with.

“Now Sookie, watch me feed on this one.” He said as he took the nameless red head by the arm. The woman looked aroused by his dominance. He dropped fang and sank into her neck. The woman moaned and writhed at his touch. Feeding and sex went hand in hand. I figured that out each time Bill’s donor would come by the house.

“Are you ready Sookie? The more aroused they are, the less painful it is on them, so feel free to touch her.”

I was absolutely not going to touch this girl in any kind of sexual way. I apprehensively pulled the girl close to me, but she was already sexually aroused thanks to the sexy Sheriff. I dropped fang and bit into her neck.

As the blood started to flow into my mouth, I instantly became aware that her blood had a different effect on me than the TruBlood did. She tasted spicy, but slightly fatty. I could tell that she didn’t have the most nutritious diet. Still, she tasted delicious and I found that I couldn’t stop feeding on her. I felt her heartbeat weaken and I knew that I needed to stop and seal her bite marks. In order to halt the bloodlust I was feeling, I started picturing her as my grandmother. I pulled away from her and lazily licked her bite marks. She was panting and moaning and wanted Eric to screw her brains out.

I backed away from her taking unnecessary breaths myself. I felt repulsed by the act itself, but yet somehow it felt right. I was a ball of conflicting emotions. On one hand I felt incredibly bad for puncturing her neck and taking her blood, but at the same time I thoroughly enjoyed it and it appeared as though she did too.

Eric took notice of my reaction and reassured me. “Sookie, you did well. I’ve never seen someone so young have such self-control. Tell me how you did it?” He asked. I could tell he was proud of me, and shocked at the same time.

“My grandmother.” I said. I must have sounded like a loon to him because he looked at me with nothing but confusion.

“I mean, I pictured that she was my grandmother and I didn’t want to hurt her.” I said meekly. That probably made no sense to a thousand year old vampire, but up until about a year ago my gran was my mentor, my idol, my mother, and my world.

“I see. A very effective tactic.” He said as he furrowed his brows.

Eric dismissed the two nameless donors from his office with a flick of his wrist. If I wasn’t in his office he probably would have fulfilled their fantasies and had a three-way with them.  As they left I could hear their disappointment and annoyance that I had “cock blocked” them.

Hearing their thoughts reminded me that I was keeping my telepathy a secret from my new master. I still didn’t trust him, but I also knew the longer I kept my telepathy from him, the angrier he would be when I finally told him.

“So, you will be working in the bar along with Pam and I. What did you do before you were turned? Did you work?” He asked.

“Yes, I worked as a waitress at Merlotte’s Bar and Grill in Bon Temps. I was a waitress for about 3 years and I can also bartend.” I said. I knew I was understating my skills, because I basically ran the bar when Sam was out. Sam had showed me how to do the ordering, inventory, accounting and even how to manage the staff.

“That’s perfect. I will have you start out in the bar, and if you do well I will put you in charge of the waitresses. You can start tomorrow.” He said

“Um Eric, there is something that I think you should know about me.” I said timidly. I was so scared to reveal my secret to him, in fear that he would treat me badly or abuse me for my “disability” in some way.

“I’m listening.” He said sternly. His blue eyes were glaring intently at me, which only made me that much more nervous about my revelation.

“Before I was turned, I, uh… I could hear people’s thoughts.” I said nervously as my eyes went from looking at his to looking directly at the floor.

He paused for a good thirty seconds before he responded to my revelation. “I see, and do you still possess that particular gift?”

“Yes, but I am out of practice with my shielding skills as you can understand why.”

“Yes, I can understand the reason. Did Bill know you possessed that skill?” He asked worriedly.

“No, I never told him and he never figured it out.” I said with venom in my voice. I hated talking or thinking about Bill.

“Can you hear Vampires or any other Supe?” He asked curiously. I knew I had to answer carefully. Vampires are very protective of their privacy, so if he didn’t believe that I couldn’t hear vampires, I was as good as truly dead.

“I can hear humans the best; I can also hear shifters and Weres, although they are a little harder. I can’t hear vampires at all.” I said emphasizing the part about the vampires. I hoped that I was convincing enough.

He glared at me for about a minute; the expression on his face was incredibly stoic. All I could do was stand there and hope that he believed me.

“I believe you.” He said and his expression softened a little bit. I felt so relieved, but I wondered why he believed me so quickly.

“Thank You.” I said softly. And just like that I began to trust him a little bit more. Trusting him with my biggest secret meant so much to me and I didn’t know how to express my gratitude to him. I had a lot more secrets and painful memories hidden away within myself, but having him accept my disability was the first step in what I had hoped would be an open and honest relationship.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

The next night started much the same as the last. When we reached his club, I went directly to the bar area and received some instruction from one of the waitresses named Belinda. She seemed competent and nice, although she had little self esteem as was typical for a fangbanger.

She showed me the ropes, so to speak and I picked everything up pretty quickly. As the night went on, I started making pretty good tips, almost double what I made at Merlotte’s on a Friday night. I noticed Eric taking a fangbanger into his office. I didn’t want to think about what was going on in there.

I started to feel the hunger as well, so I grabbed a bottle of Trublood. I didn’t feel comfortable feeding on a fangbanger and even less so without Eric’s supervision. Eric said that I only needed human blood every couple of months or so, so I felt comfortable satiating myself with synthetic.

I was wiping down a table, when I heard my name being called.

“Sookie, Chere!” Sam called from across the bar. He wore an expression of happiness mixed with sorrow, anger and guilt. His thoughts were laced with relief, but he also felt guilty for not protecting me from Bill.

“Sam, Oh my god. I never thought I would see you again.” I said as I flew into his open arms. I wanted to cry so badly, but I willed the bloody tears away. I was ashamed to show my vampire nature around Sam, knowing how he felt about vampires.

“I know chere, I know. I looked for you I swear it. I didn’t believe you had died or ran away. I went to Bill’s. I could have sworn I smelled your scent, but it was off somehow so I couldn’t be sure it was you. Dammit, I should have protected you better, I should have told you how I felt. Maybe this never would have happened.” Sam spilled. It was tearing him up inside knowing what all happened to me. He felt extreme guilt for not being there for me and for not telling me that he loved me.

“It’s not your fault, it’s not anyone’s except Bill’s. “ I said as I looked him deep in the eyes. I refused to drop his embrace. In truth, Sam was exactly the comfort that I needed, he was familiar, he was a link to my former life, the life that I never wanted to give up. In truth, I loved him too, maybe not in the same way he loved me, but I cherished him anyway.

There were no more words to say between the two of us, we just stood there embracing each other, not wanting to let go. Moments went by until a booming demanding voice interrupted our reunion.

“Shifter, get your paws off my child.” demanded Eric.

“Sheriff, Sookie and I are longtime friends. I mean no harm to her.” Explained Sam.

“Follow me.” Eric said as he flicked his hand ushering us towards his office. Sam and I followed, but I refused to drop his hand from mine. As we entered Eric’s office holding hands, Eric noticed our affectionate display and gave me a warning glare.

“Shifter, it is too dangerous for you to be around Sookie alone. If you wish to see her, you must obtain permission from me first. Is that understood.” Eric ordered. He was in full on Sheriff mode. I thought it was irrational of him to make such demands of Sam. Sam was a friend of mine and I thought I should be able to see him whenever I wanted.

“I understand Eric, but you should know that Sookie is very special to me and should be treated with respect and dignity.” Sam replied, and he was completely honest when he said I was special to him.

“Is that so, well she is definitely special, and an asset as well. I have treated Sookie well thus far. Wouldn’t you agree Sookie?” I was definitely not keen on the fact that Eric thought of me as nothing more than an asset to him. It truly made me question the decision to reveal my telepathy. But I did have to agree that he was treating me well, infinitely better than my maker.

“Yes, Sheriff.” I replied. If I was touted as an asset to him, than he was nothing more than a sheriff to me.

“Very well. Shifter, you may come to see Sookie on Wednesdays between the hours of 8 and 10.” I wanted to protest, but I thought the better of it. I felt like a prisoner who had visiting hours. Sam was not happy about our limited interaction time, but he didn’t argue.

“Fine. Sookie, Wednesdays will be my new favorite day, and I look forward to spending time with you.” Sam said.

Sam, not letting the male posturing get the best of him, kissed my lips lightly and said. “Until then Cher, please know that I love you.”  He said as he walked out of the office and left the club.

I let out an unnecessary sigh and allowed a single bloody tear to escape down my cheek. In that moment, I permitted myself to mourn the loss of my human life.  Eric eyed me carefully, not letting my emotional outburst to go unnoticed.

“Do you love the shifter?” Eric asked carefully as he tossed around some papers on his desk.

“In my own way, yes.” I replied honestly. I loved Sam like I loved my brother Jason. He was always there for me and I him.

“Yes, well you should get back to work.” Eric stated icily.

I took a minute to compose myself and clean my face, and I walked out to the bar area. The rest of the night went without a hitch. Eric and I closed up and left to go back to his home. I wanted to talk to Eric about a timeline when I could be allowed to go back to my own home, but I thought that with everything that happened with Sam tonight, I would wait to broach the topic with him. 

Eric didn’t say anything to me the rest of the night, and I was okay with that. The tranquil silence gave me time to gather my thoughts and reflect on the last four months of my undead life. Whatever progress I felt I had made with Eric last night, seemingly disappeared by his demeanor tonight. I felt so out of place and had no one to talk to. Pam ignored me all night, and Eric made me feel like I was some kind of monster who would murder Sam. Funny how he would allow me to work at a bar surrounded by humans, but I couldn’t spend time alone with Sam.  The more I thought about it, the more furious I became. But if the last four months had taught me anything, it was to reign in my emotions and not speak my thoughts and feelings.

In truth, I couldn’t really judge how Eric would treat me as a maker; we had really only spent two and a half nights together.

OoOoOoOoO

The next five days droned on like the last. Eric and I fell into a silent routine. I would rise an hour after him, we would go to the bar. He would take a couple of fangbangers a night and I would drink my TruBlood. I would wait the tables, while he sat on the throne. We would close the bar and go home to rest. We barely spoke to each other, save the hour each night he would spend with me explaining and teaching me the ways of the vampire world.

I learned a lot from him, both by his instruction and just by me observing him each night. Pam never spoke to me. I don’t know what her problem was with me, but in truth, I didn’t really care.

Finally the silence between us was broken on the ride home.

“Bill’s trial is tomorrow.” Eric said stoically as he stared blankly ahead behind the steering wheel.

I didn’t say anything in response, but the amount of emotion running through me felt like I was being struck by lightning. I tried to reign myself in and show no emotion. I didn’t want anyone to think that Bill had broken me.

“You are expected to go and possibly testify.” Eric continued without looking at me.

I couldn’t rein it in any longer; I didn’t want to see Bill again much less have to recount the god-awful things he had done to me in front of anyone. My body started shaking uncontrollably as red tears brimmed the lids of my eyes. 

“Sookie, it will be fine. I will be there for you.” Eric finally softened and looked at me with pity and comfort lacing his eyes. He put his hand on top of mine in a gesture of comfort. The last thing I wanted anyone to feel for me was pity. I quickly composed myself and wiped away the tears.

“I am fine.” I replied frigidly as I pulled away from his touch. I neither wanted his pity nor his comfort. I just wanted to be alone. The remainder of the drive home was awkwardly silent and thankfully Eric drove like a bat out of hell, so it didn’t last long.

As we walked into his house, he stopped me before I could go to my room.

“Sookie, I am not your enemy.” He whispered softly.

“I know, but you’re not exactly my friend either.” I quickly replied.

“Maybe not, but I would like to be.” He said humbly as he held my wrist and looked deeply into my eyes.

“Look Sheriff” I used his official title to try to drive the conversation away from some kind of emotional one on one talk. “We both know that you are only watching over me because you were forced to. I am nothing but an asset to you.” I continued. The tenor of my voice was not overtly confrontational, but it wasn’t exactly friendly either.

“Is that how you see it?” Eric said angrily. He was seething; I had made him angry by my accusation.

“Is that not how it is?” I retorted. Answering a question with a question, a good deflection tactic.

“No!”

“Then tell me Sheriff, how is it?” This conversation was pointless and I was angry at myself for taking his bait.

“Why do you call me by my official title? Sookie, why are you so angry with me? Tell me what have I done to make you hate me?”

“I don’t hate you, I don’t even know you and you don’t even know me. Yet you won’t allow me to see Sam for more than a measly hour once a week. What have I done to deserve that?” I countered.  I wanted to be done with this conversation, so I could go die for the day.  

“We don’t know anything about each other because you won’t let anyone in!” he spewed angrily. “I won’t let you see the shifter because he doesn’t deserve you!” he continued. He pulled me into his body roughly by my shoulders. Before I knew what was happening he crushed his lips to mine in such an urgent way. He ran his tongue roughly against my lips begging me for entry, but I quickly pulled away from his coarse embrace.

I stood in utter shock, eyes focused on his as I backed away from him carefully.

“Sookie, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” He apologized. “Sookie, you are beautiful and I just…”

I cut him off before he could continue his line of thought. “You just thought you could take what you wanted.” I counteracted. I was getting real tired of this dominant vampire, take what you want screw the consequences attitude.

“NO!” he replied bitterly. “I have never taken anyone without their consent. I am not like Bill.” He was angry at my insinuation that he was like my maker. I actually regretted that particular insinuation, because I honestly didn’t believe he was anything like Bill. Hell, Satan himself was better than Bill.

“I need to rest.” I said softly. I was resigned to get out of this uncomfortable situation. I turned away from him and walked up to my room closing the door behind me.

Eric and I had only spent a week together and we were not exactly getting along. I didn’t want to be angry at him, but I just had so much anger inside me and I suppose I was misdirecting all of it at him. Certainly what he did to me and Sam made me angry, and there was definite tension between us, but I needed to remember to reign in my emotions better in the future. I needed to remember that the goal was to bide my time with Eric until he would release me.

When I woke the next night, Eric was sitting at the foot of my bed. He had sort of a somber look on his face. I could see the regret in his eyes, he must have been feeling the same way I had been.

He handed me a bottle of TruBlood and eyed me carefully.

“Sookie, I apologize for kissing you last night. I understand your trepidations of being touched without permission and I should have been more considerate of your feelings.” He asked for forgiveness humbly.

“I accept. And I am sorry for insinuating that you are like Bill.” I said sorrowfully.

“I accept as well. You should dress for the trial.” He was not the big bad Sheriff that I have come to know, he was actually quite self-effacing . He got off the bed and went downstairs. He was already dressed for the trial, wearing grey suit pants, black dress shirt and a grey tie.

Judging by his attire, I knew I needed to find something similar. I went through the clothes that Pam had bought for me and found a black Ann Taylor Ponte Sheath dress, I paired it with some black pointed toe Jimmy Choo pumps. I looked like I was going to a funeral, perhaps if all went well that’s exactly what it would be.

As I descended the stairs, Eric looked upon me in apparent approval of my wardrobe choice. We didn’t say anything to each other; I guess he was as exhausted with our conversation as I was.

I had no idea where the trial was being held, but Eric seemed to have all the details worked out, so I just rode in silence. After about a half hour of driving, we approached an abandoned building on the outskirts of Bon Temps.  The building used to be an old basketball gymnasium that the High School used. But the school built a new one in the 90’s, so this building fell into somewhat of disrepair.

As we walked in to the building, there were about 30 vampires situated in the bleachers. There was a podium and four chairs set up on top of a stage. There were another four chairs set up facing the stage.

I immediately noticed a tall bald headed man. He looked like he was setting up the stage. I laughed inwardly at his appearance because he reminded me of a genie. He was on these really bizarre gold parachute pants and no shirt. I checked his shoes to make sure they weren’t the half-moon pointy shoes, but to my surprise they actually were these Roman looking sandals.

I found myself intrigued by him, if for anything, his appearance. The closer I got to him, the more I captivated I was by him. He had these gorgeous and unique pansy purple eyes. He was probably 200 pounds of pure muscle. He was definitely not a vampire either judging by his deep tan. I thought he was a shifter of some sort, I thought some kind of feline.

Eric motioned for me to sit next to him the front row of the bleachers. I sat quietly observing my surroundings, when suddenly the entire room fell silent as some VIV’s (Very Important Vampires) walked into the room. It was 2 men and a 2 woman, and they all went to sit on the stage. One of the women looked to be ancient, but I knew she was a vampire.  As they took their seats, genie man, who I assumed was the emcee, began the trial.

“Ladies and Gentleman, We are here for the Trial of William Compton. He is charged with crimes against humanity specifically the rape and subsequent nonconsensual turning of Sookie Stackhouse. Will the accused please come forth.”

Bill entered the room flanked by what I assumed was his attorney. He immediately made eye contact with me. I felt his burning seething anger. He wanted to kill me, and I knew it. I projected the same feelings back at him. I was proud of myself for not cowering in his presence, I held my head high and I found the courage to return his hateful stares. I somehow felt empowered in that moment to face him without fear. I felt Eric’s hand embrace mine, but I didn’t want to look like I needed any kind of support, because I really didn’t, so I quickly removed my hand from his.

This was all on me, and I wanted to face Bill alone because I knew I was strong and brave enough to do it on my own.

Bill took a seat in one of the chairs sitting in front of the stage, so his back was facing me. The genie man began to make the VIV’s introductions.

“William Compton is being judged by Sophie Anne LeClerq, Queen of Louisiana, Stan Davis, King of Texas, Jermaine Thompson, King of Kansas, and the honorable, her grace, The Ancient Pythoness.  Mr. Davis, you may begin your questioning.”

“Thank you Quinn, Mr. Compton, you are being accused of heinous crimes against an innocent woman. These accusations, as you well know, are very serious. You have caused great turmoil, not only to this woman, but also to the vampire population as a whole. Your blatant disregard for the laws which were adopted at the start of the Great Revelation have caused a rift in the human relations, not to mention the abscess terror to this innocent woman. What have you say for yourself?”

“Your Majesty, this woman, my child, was not unwilling. She agreed to be turned, just as she consented to a sexual relationship with me.” Bill spouted. His lies made my blood boil, but I maintained my composure. He was baiting me for an emotional response in the hope that I would paint myself some kind of unstable lunatic in the eyes of the judges.

Sophie Ann spoke up, “Is this true? Bring the accuser forward to refute his response.”

I stood from my chair and proudly walked to the stage. I made sure that I kept my emotions in check despite Bill’s disgusting claim.

“No your majesties, this is not the truth.” I said calmly and directly. I knew that they would appreciate my brevity.

“Little One, if you would please, tell us the circumstances surrounding your turning,” said the Ancient Pythoness in an accent that I could not place.

Holding my head up proudly, I started telling the judges my side of the story. “About 2 years ago Bill moved into the old farm house across the cemetery from my own. At the time, he and my grandmother got along because of their mutual interest in the Civil War. I never really interacted with him much, but he would always ask me to go on dates with him which I repeatedly refused. After my grandmother died a little over a year ago, his interest in me increased and he continued his attempts to court me. One night about four months ago, Bill asked me out on a date while I was working at Merlotte’s Bar and Grille. I again refused like I always did. When I got home from work that night, Bill was standing on my porch, he started accosting me about why I would never go out with him. He followed me into my home, so I tried to rescind his invitation, but he grabbed me and put his hand over my mouth. I fought him as hard as I could, but it was to no avail. He drug me across the cemetery to his home where he violently raped me. I was a virgin before his attack and he was not gentle to say the least. He shattered my pelvis and bruised my legs and chest. He then ripped into my neck draining my life force, leaving me for dead. He forced his blood down my throat, thus resulting in my vampirism.” I concluded. I didn’t feel shameful about sharing my story with a bunch of strangers; in fact I found it quite cathartic. I felt nothing but anger coming from Bill’s side of the bond; I projected vengeance back at him.

The room fell silent after I told my account of the events leading to my turning. The Ancient Pythoness was the first to speak.

“Child, come to me.” She said solemnly as she held out her hand. I walked up to the stage and placed my soft hand into her wrinkled one.

I closed my eyes, as she held my hand for more than a minute. I’m felt a pull from my mind, sort of like glamouring, but it was different. The events of my turning played through my mind sort of like a movie reel. I wondered if the AP was seeing what I was projecting.

“William Compton, you are guilty.” The AP proclaimed. I stood in front of her stunned at how I had just replayed my story to her.

“You Fucking Whore!” Bill bellowed angrily and he charged me. Eric flew in front of me grabbing Bill by the neck subduing him and thus protecting me.

Jermaine stood to hand down the sentence. “William Compton You are hereby sentenced to your final death. All of your assets will be transferred to your progeny. Ms. Stackhouse, you may decide how Mr. Compton meets his final death.”

“Your majesty, if it pleases you I would like to differ to my maker by proxy. “ I said as I smiled at Eric.

“Very well, Sheriff Northman, how would you like to deal with Mr. Compton?” asked Jermaine.

Eric grinned evilly in my direction as he unsheathed a sword that he had carried on his back.

“A quick death is too good for this pathetic creature.” Eric seethed as he swung his sword swiftly effectively detaching Bill’s head from his body.

As soon as Eric’s sword made contact with Bill’s head, I felt an unbearable pain. I fell to my knees and clenched my head. It felt like my head was being smashed to pieces. I screamed out in agony, and I felt cold hands embracing me. I looked up to find the hands belonged to none other than Pam. I didn’t even know she was here.

After a few minutes, the pain subsided and I felt bizarrely free.  I wondered why Pam felt the need to comfort me, she had been nothing but icy to me for the past week. 

I rose from the floor with the aid of Pam and walked out the doors alone. I needed a few moments to take in everything that had just happened. I felt free and it was liberating, I hadn’t come to terms fully with the events of the last four months, but facing Bill down and seeing him to his death sure helped.

I stood outside, looking up at the stars as I wrapped my arms around myself. I felt oddly peaceful knowing that that monster would absolutely never terrorize me again.

“You are a brave and strong woman Ms. Stackhouse.” The genie said. He startled me and that is difficult to do to a vampire.

“Yes, well I guess it is my cross to bear.” I said coldly.

“I saw my mother go through something similar, and she didn’t come out of it a sane person.” He said. He was trying to comfort me or let me know that I was brave, but in all honesty, I didn’t appreciate or want his input in the matter. Some people think that by hearing someone’s story that they somehow know what I am going through or that they have some obliging input on how I should handle it.

“Yes, well everyone handles things differently, now if you’ll excuse me.” I said

“I meant no disrespect, I was just…”

I cut him off the same way I did with Eric “You just thought that you had an opinion about me that was worth sharing.”

“I’m sorry ma’am. I only meant to compliment you.”

“I appreciate your compliments.” I said as I walked away making my way back into the old gymnasium. I still had to tie up some loose ends by signing Bill’s final death decree, the deed to his home, the title to his car and some other bank account information.

According to the lawyer, Mr. Cataliades, Bill was worth about $7.3 million dollars. Most of the proceeds were from the sale of his database. His house was worth $100,000 the BMW $18,000, a strip mall worth about $300,000. he had some meager jewelry. He was heavily invested in futures, specifically oil.

Although I wanted nothing to do with his possessions, it was nice to have a little nest egg of my own, maybe once Eric released me, I could go into business of my own.  I figured I would sell his car and house, and I would speak to Eric about the strip mall and the database.

“You showed me great respect tonight. You make me proud to call you my child” Eric whispered in my ear as we walked out to the car.

“Thank you Eric, I appreciate it.” I replied. 

The drive home was quiet and I was reflective. I was happy to close that chapter in my undead life, and I actually felt anxious about my future.

“Sookie, I really do want to get to know you. I look forward to the day that you will come to count me as your friend.” Eric said, and I didn’t really respond, but I felt the same way, I just needed time to heal and come to terms with the sexual abuse that I had been subjected to my entire life. I felt hopeful for the first time in over four months and that was a good feeling. 


	8. Dawn Arrives

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

After Eric and I got back home from the trial, there was still about 3 hours before dawn, so I decided to head up to my room and catch up on some reading.

Bill had only let me read non-fiction scientific stuff, so I found it an incredible indulgence to be able to read my Harlequin novels. This particular one starred a very sexy, very muscular pirate named Gaspar. He was secretly in love with a lowly deckhand, but he was promised to a wealthy maiden. I was enthralled in the story and really wasn’t paying much attention to the time. By the time I finished the 800 page novel, felt chipper as a finch and slightly hot and bothered.

Glancing at the alarm clock I noticed that it said 8:52 a.m. I thought for sure that was a mistake. If that time were accurate, that would mean that I should have been dead for the day over 2 hours ago, but I never felt the pull of dawn.

I went downstairs to find Eric and to check the time on another clock in the house, but to my dismay, Eric was nowhere to be found and the clock on the microwave in the kitchen matched my alarm clock. Also, another dead giveaway was that the sun was up.

The windows in Eric’s home are tempered in such a way that they block out the harmful rays that make vampires burn. Still, that meant that not only did I not feel the pull of dawn, but also that I was able to stay awake past it.

Suddenly a feeling of colossal dread swept my body. This had never happened to me before, and I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t speak to Eric because for one thing he was locked in his chamber and I didn’t have the code to get in, and two, he was dead to the world like I should have been.

I went to the refrigerator and warmed myself a TruBlood, hoping that feeding would calm me down a bit. It wasn’t that I necessarily felt hungry; in fact I didn’t really feel much like a vampire at all.

I gulped down my TruBlood and decided to take a long hot soaking bath. In my human life, I never appreciated the immense pleasure a bath could bring, but I certainly appreciated it now. The way the water caressed my skin felt like pure silk. The scent of the bath oils permeating my senses felt like I was lying in a lavender field in the South of France. The sheer pleasure and relaxation of having nothing to do, no one’s thoughts overpowering my own, no problems to face and no worries weighing on my mind. It was just me and the solidarity of it felt divine.

When I got out of the tub, it was about 10:15, I still had pretty much the whole day ahead of me and nothing to do. If I was human Sookie Stackhouse, I would have put on my bikini, grabbed my iPod and some iced tea and lay out on the lawn.

I actually wondered if the sun’s rays would affect me, I was highly tempted to try, but I didn’t have the security codes, so I was essentially locked in.

I grabbed another one of my romance novels and started reading. When I finished this book, it was about 4:00 and I could hear Eric stirring in his day chamber. He was going to be shocked as hell to see me awake before him and I was dying to see his reaction, no pun intended.

Eric opened the door to his day chamber and his eyes immediately locked in on mine. To say he was shocked was an understatement. His eyes nearly bulged out of his head.

“Sookie, how are you awake right now.” He asked incredulously.

“Actually, Eric, I’ve been up all day.”

“What? How is this possible, this has never happened to you before?”Still shocked by my revelation.

“I was wondering the same thing and no, this has never happened to me before. See, I thought about this when I was taking a bath this morning. The only thing that has changed since yesterday is that my maker is no longer living.” I stated thoughtfully.

“That is all good and well, but my maker is no longer living either and I am not able to remain awake all day. I am over a thousand years old and I can only resist the pull for about an hour or so.” His thoughts trailed off slightly.

After a few moments of deep consideration, he continued. “There is only one other vampire I have ever met, that was able to remain awake all day. His name is Callum Fraser, I fought alongside him in many many wars, but I haven’t spoken to him in over 500 years. I am going to make some phone calls; maybe he can help shed some light on your new ability.”

“Umm, okay. So I guess we will just wait and see then.” I said apprehensively.

“We will discuss this further later but now, Sookie, we must go to Compton’s home and go through his belongings. You still want to sell the house correct?” Eric asked.

“Yes, I want to be rid of it. Eric, do you think it would be possible for me to gather some of my belongings from my home?” I asked timidly. In truth, there weren’t many items of value, but I wanted to get some of the more sentimental ones at least.

“I think that would be alright.” He said as he gave me a simple friendly smile. That simple gesture meant more to me than he would ever know.

We drove to Bon Temps in a companionable silence, until about half way there, Eric looked at me worriedly. I could tell that he had something that he wanted to say to me, but didn’t want to voice it.

“Sookie, I would like to start training you how to fight and wield a sword.” He said matter of factly. I didn’t know what brought that on, and I wondered if he thought there was some kind of danger looming.

I ultimately agreed, thinking pragmatically, it would be nice to be able to defend myself.

“What did you have in mind?” I asked.

“I would like to spend at least a little time each night sparring and teaching you hand to hand combat.”

“That sounds great Eric, I look forward to kicking your ass.” I smirked teasingly at him and he smiled back in a ‘yeah right’ kind of way.

I never thought I would be back at this literal hell hole, but here I was standing in his decrepit mausoleum.  Eric eyed me carefully ensuring that I was okay with everything.

Truth is, it was definitely uncomfortable being in his house, but I actually felt like I was conquering my fears and coming to terms with the torture and abuse Bill had subjected me to. Being able to walk freely in his home somehow made me feel like I had won the war, I was the one alive and he was the one that was dead.

As I walked through the entryway, I immediately went to the one room I was never allowed into, his bedroom.  He had no possessions that I cared to keep, just some clothing, old pictures of his human family that were so worn you could barely make out any of the faces, a family bible, and some linens. I decided that I would donate the bible and the pictures to the local historical society and I would donate the clothing and linens to Goodwill.

Next room was the one that I was allowed to use. Of course I had no possessions that I cared to keep. Bill barely let me wear any clothing, and the ones I was allowed to wear were no bigger than a napkin.

After that, I tackled his library/office. He had a big box full of unlabelled DVD’s and a box full of disks for the database. I took his laptop computer and the 2 boxes and brought them to the foyer.

Eric asked me what the unlabeled DVD’s were, but I had no idea, so Eric decided to open one and put it in the DVD player to find out.  Both Eric and I stood in front of Bill’s projection TV waiting with baited breath as the video started.

Shock, horror, humiliation and shame filled my body as I saw images of my sexual abuse being displayed on 60 inches of high definition right in front of my eyes. As soon as Eric registered what it was that he was actually watching, he quickly turned off the TV. I ran outside and sat on the stoop. I had absolutely no idea that he had recorded the abuse. I sat on the stoop with my head firmly between my knees hunched over in utter humiliation rocking myself back in forth in the hopes that I would open my eyes and it would all have been a dream.

I felt Eric’s hand on my shoulder, but I didn’t look up. I was too ashamed to look him in the eyes. Of course he knew that I had been abused. It’s one thing to have someone know about it, but it’s an entirely different feeling to have them see it firsthand.

I felt Eric’s strong arms lifting me to my feet. He wrapped his muscular arms around my body in a gesture of love and care. In that moment I didn’t want to let him go, he felt safe to me. I couldn’t keep all the feelings inside of me any longer. I began to sob, soaking his shirt with my crimson tears. I wept for the all the hurt, humiliation and shame I felt. I wept because I needed to get it all out of my system, to allow the anger and the indignity that I felt release from my body.

He held me for as long as I needed to be held. As I disengaged from his body, I saw the damage I had done to his shirt and instantly felt guilty.

“I ruined your shirt.” I said, as I wiped my face with the back of my hand.

“I don’t give a fuck about my shirt, only you.” He countered as his cerulean eyes bore into mine. I could feel the sincerity in his embrace.

“Eric, I want to burn this hell hole to the ground. I don’t want to sell it, I don’t want anything from it, I just want it to turn into a pile of ash.” My voice was monotonous and astringent.

Eric went back into the house to retrieve the computer and everything else related to the database. He piled everything into the trunk of his car while I stood stock still on the porch.

Eric flew past me going back into the house and the next thing I knew the 150 plus year old house was up in flames. Eric came to stand next to me as we looked on the house as it burned to the ground. Eric held my hand and led me to the car. As we drove away I couldn’t take my eyes of the burning structure through my side view mirror. It was the perfect symbolism for the way my life had turned out.

“Eric, I want to sell every asset he had. I don’t want any of it, not the mall, not the database, none of it. I even want to sell off his investments. “I said icily.

“I will take care of all of it Sookie, I will not subject you to anymore dealings of his. You can re-invest the money as you wish and I would be honored to help you with that.” Eric said softly.

I looked over to him and placed my hand on top of his. Our eyes met as he turned his hand over entwining his fingers with mine.

“Thank you.” I whispered.

“If you ever want to talk about it, please know that I am here for you. I can relate to you a lot more than you might imagine.” He replied sympathetically. His comment sparked my curiosity, how could he relate to what I had gone through? 


	9. Hey Jealousy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

“There are six basic attack zones, you must find the most vulnerable zone and concentrate on the cut of your sword.” Eric said enthusiastically. Fighting and really violence of any kind was not exactly my cup of tea, but Eric wanted me to learn to defend myself, and he was obviously taking a lot of pride and joy in teaching me, so I would oblige him.

I focused intently on each word he spoke, each pointer he gave and I made sure to emulate each mannerism he took. He truly was magnificent wielding his sword.

This was our 30th lesson, and over the past month since burning down Compton’s house and I had become awfully proficient at sword fighting. I beat Pam a couple of times which really peeved her off. Eric radiated pride at both of us because we both fought each other valiantly for a long time, until I ultimately pinned her with my sword. I could never even come close to beating Eric; he was arguably the best warrior of all time.

“You must trust yourself to wield your sword with precision. You have to be confident, but never make the mistake of being cocky, cockiness will get you killed.” He continued our lesson. We were parrying with each other, when I decided I would finally beat him this time. I took my eyes off of him for less than a second, so that I could try to find an advantage. All of a sudden I was pinned to the floor with Eric’s sword to my throat.

“Never take your eyes off of your opponent.” He said smugly, and he had me. Damn arrogant Viking. He extended his hand to help me off the ground. I always lost to him, but I took every loss in stride. He wasn’t beating me to prove his ferocity, he was teaching me all of the thousand year old knowledge that he had gained and for that I was thankful.

The relationship that Eric and I had developed since the night we burned Compton’s house, was constantly improving. I trusted him and he, for the most part, trusted me in return. We were comfortable in our living arrangement. I would wait for him to wake; we would train for an hour, and go to Fangtasia for the remainder of the night.

We weren’t as close as I had sort of hoped we would be, but I suppose that comes with time. I did however, notice that he did not take as many Fangbangers as he used to. I started to ask him about it one night, but I lost my nerve. I wasn’t arrogant enough to think that it was because of me, so I wondered what was really going on.

I had come to like Eric a lot; I certainly relied on him more than I’ve ever relied on anyone in my life and that was both reassuring and frightening at the same time. Right after that night at Compton’s I started noticing that I would get slightly more jealous each time he would take a Fangbanger. I told myself over and over again, that that was his nature, and I had no right to be jealous. Of course, I would never tell Eric I felt that way. It wouldn’t matter anyway because Eric and I could never be together. I was way too damaged and he had no interest in me romantically anyway.

“I have finally spoken with Callum, he will be here in two days time to discuss the changes you are going through.” Eric said matter of factly as we were driving to Fangtasia.

“Great, maybe I can finally get some answers.” I replied. I had been experiencing some vampire anomalies since Bill died. I was able to avoid the pull of the sun and I even noticed that I developed the ability to fly. The flying was different that Eric’s ability. The way he flew was more bird-like, where-as my ability was more like a floating fluid-like motion. Eric thought that that was my vampire ability, but I was not convinced.

The night after Eric and I burned Compton’s house, he took me to the farmhouse to retrieve some of the sentimental belongings that I wanted. I took mostly, photos, jewelry, and some other knick knacks. That night I asked him if I could see Jason. Eric agreed that it would be okay for me to see Jason. I called Jason and he agreed to come visit me at Fangtasia the next time Sam came to see me. Unfortunately, Sam had not been able to see me since the first night he came to Fangtasia. But since tonight was Wednesday, I hoped that Sam would show up with Jason. I missed them both deeply. In fact each Wednesday I held out hope that Sam would stop by, but he hadn’t. I didn’t take it personally; I knew that he just didn’t want to deal with a pissed off Sheriff. I was still a little angry at Eric for limiting my interaction with Sam in such a selfish way.

As we walked into Fangtasia, there was nothing extraordinary going on. Pam came to greet us as soon as we walked in.

“Good Evening Eric, Sookie. Sookie, you look lovely this evening.” She said slightly bored, but still politely. Pam and I had become sort of friends since the night she comforted me at the trial. She didn’t exactly apologize for being so icy to me before, but vampires never really apologize, at least not copiously anyways. Plus, Pam knew I could hold my own against her and she respected me for it. Eric also loved the fact that we were getting along, and we both wanted to see Eric happy, so we both made an effort to get to know one another. Truth be told we had a lot in common, we never really fit into the societal norms, she had been attacked and almost sexually assaulted, and we both cared a lot about Eric.

“Sookie, you have some visitors this evening.” Pam said and she didn’t look too happy at who my visitors were. I hoped that my visitors were my brother and Sam. I looked over at Eric and he didn’t look too happy either.

I walked into the main area of the bar only to find the only two people in the world that I wanted to see. I ran at a human speed and jumped into the awaiting arms of my brother.

“Jason! Oh my gosh I’ve missed you!” I said and I noticed that he was taking in all of my appearance trying to decipher how much I had actually changed. I assumed that he already knew I was a vampire, and I really wanted his acceptance.

“Sook, you look beautiful! I heard what that motherfucker did to you, if he wasn’t dead, I’d kill him myself.” Jason said and I read through his thoughts that he was just happy that I was alive and didn’t care that I was a vampire. He, like Sam, blamed himself for not protecting me from Bill.

I turned to Sam and gave him a big hug as well.  All the while I could feel Eric’s eye’s boring into the back of my head. He was watching me like a hawk, to make sure that Sam didn’t do anything he thought would be untowards.

“Chere, you look great. I’ve missed you so much. It’s just not the same without you.” Sam said solemnly. If I didn’t hate the site of my crimson tears so much, I would have been a sobbing mess right now.

Jason, Sam and I spoke for the next 2 hours until my “visiting hours” were over. We talked about the Bon Temps gossip mill and how things were going at the bar. Sam and Jase promised to come back next week and I told them both that I would hold them to their word. Jason gave me another hug and a peck on the cheek, and Sam gave me a kiss on the lips. I could have sworn I heard Eric growl when he saw that, but I couldn’t be sure it was directed at me.

I was riding on the high of their visit when I got back to work. I was now in charge of the entire bar which included ordering the liquor, managing the staff, and invoicing. I noticed that Eric took a blonde headed fangbanger with daddy issues and low self esteem back to his office. They were in there for a while, so I knew he wasn’t just feeding. Yes, I was jealous I admit it. In fact this time, I was more jealous than ever because the fangbanger sort of looked like me. Pam must have noticed my reaction and she quickly came over to speak to me.

“You know he only does it because you won’t admit your feelings for him.” She said smoothly.

“I don’t have feelings for him Pam.” I replied frigidly.  Yes I know denial is not just a river, but what could I have done. I didn’t want to be rejected by Eric; moreover, I didn’t want him to think of me as being some kind of damaged goods. I cared too much for him to risk any kind of rift in our relationship.

At the end of the night, Eric and I drove home in glacial silence. I couldn’t stop thinking about that stupid trashy fangbanger. Never in my life, did I think I would be jealous of a fangbanger and I hated myself for it.

When we got to the house, without saying a word, Eric went straight to his day chamber. Since I didn’t need to sleep, I found myself reading book after book. I probably read every book in his library. I told Eric about it and last week he bought me a Kindle so that I could read whatever book I wanted to electronically. I loved it! I spent so much time with my new gadget that I almost became dependant on it.

I didn’t like the way things ended last night with Eric all but giving me the silent treatment, so I resolved myself to talking to him about why he was so cold.

As soon as he rose, we both downed a bottle of TruBlood, he asked me if I was ready to train.

“Can we talk first? I didn’t like the way things ended last night.” I said in a humble manner.

“Did you enjoy your time with the shifter?” he said the word shifter in such a manner of disgust that I knew then that he was just as jealous of Sam as I was of the blond fangbanger.

I decided to ignore his blatant disgust for Sam and replied in a friendly tone.  “Yes I did.”

“Eric, did I do something to anger you last night?”

“No.” he said he was being so short and cold with me, that I was starting to get angry.

“If this is about the kiss between Sam and I, I told you…” I was starting to say that I told him that Sam and I were just friends, but he cut me off.

“Yes I know, you told me that you loved Sam. I have no claim on you Sookie, You are free to see whoever you want.” He said and he was seething. In fact he didn’t even look at me the entire time we were talking.

I really didn’t want to train with him when he was that angry, but against my better judgment I trudged along with our nightly routine.

He was really angry with me, although he would never admit that, I could tell because he was relentless with his strikes. He was fighting me as if we were truly enemies and this was a battle to the death.  

We were parrying, I admittedly was exhausted. It took all of my energy to fight him back and hold him off, but I couldn’t take it anymore. He knocked the sword out of my hand and in doing so he slashed my left wrist down to the bone.

I wailed out in pain as blood came gushing from my wrist. I knew it would heal, but he nicked one of the main arteries in my wrist, so blood was really pouring out fast.

Eric must have been in some kind of battle trance, because it took him a good minute to register that he had done actual damage to me. He immediately dropped his sword and rushed to kneel beside me on the floor. He picked up my bleeding wrist to inspect my wounds.

“Fuck!” he screamed out. He noticed how deep the cut was. If my hand was positioned at a slightly different angle, he would have sliced it clean off, but as it was, it would heal in a few hours or so.

Eric was angry at himself for hurting me the way he had, but before I gave him the chance to apologize, I picked myself off the ground and ran out of the room. I rushed into my room and shut the door. I didn’t want to talk to Eric; I didn’t even want to look at him.

I knew he didn’t mean to hurt me, but he should have controlled himself better. He was only out of control because of the Sam situation from last night. I just felt like I would take two steps forward with Eric, only for something to happen and end up taking three steps back. I was frustrated beyond measure and I didn’t know if I could handle the living situation anymore.

I heard the garage door open and close, and I knew that Eric had left for Fangtasia without me. He would sulk the rest of the night and blame himself. He would get so angry that he would probably take it out on three or four fangbangers, I was sure of that.

I never truly need sleep, but I had lost quite a bit of blood and my wound still wasn’t healed. I decided to lie in bed and try to sleep away my problems.  Around 3 a.m I heard Eric come back home. He went straight to his day chamber without coming to check on me. And I found myself hurt by that, more so than the incident itself.

The next night, Eric rose, but I made myself scarce. Normally we would drink a TruBlood together before training, but I just couldn’t do it, so I stayed in my room. There was a knock on my door, and Eric walked in.

I was sitting in bed reading on my Kindle, so he sat at the foot of my bed he didn’t look at me, not even once.

“Callum will be here shortly to train you.” Was all he said before he left my room.  No apology and no acknowledgment of the incident from last night. My gut wretched at the sobering thought that he just didn’t care.

I dressed in some jeans and a spaghetti strapped shirt, and trudged downstairs. I felt more alone in his house than ever, and the only reprieve I had was the thought of a stranger coming to talk to me breaking the dead silence between Eric and I.

The doorbell rang, and Eric went to greet our guest.  He was tall, not taller than Eric, but still impressive. He had short brown hair that looked like it was intentional bed head. He was not as muscular as Eric, but he looked like he could definitely hold his own. He had gorgeous blue eyes. He had on a pair of blue jeans, you know the kind that looks really old and worn, but you know that they are designer and probably cost more than one night’s worth of tips. He had on a light grey plain t-shirt and some black boots. He was stunningly gorgeous.

“Hi, I’m Sookie.” I said in my polite as pie Southern manner.

“Callum Fraser, lovely to meet you. Eric failed to mention how beautiful you were. I would have come sooner had I known.” He said in a fascinating Irish accent. If I could blush I would have blushed at his kind words. His words could make a nun swoon.  God love a man with an accent.

“Yes, well let’s go sit.” Eric said sharply, not exactly feeling our little introduction.

“So Sookie, tell me about the new abilities you have acquired.” Callum asked. I was so focused on his beautiful blue eyes, that I didn’t hear what he said.

“Sookie, tell Callum what you have been experiencing.” Eric repeated Callum’s question derisively.

I hadn’t noticed that I wasn’t paying attention to what Callum was saying, until Eric asked the question again.

“Oh, Um, well I don’t feel the pull of the sun, and I can fly.” I said still staring, rudely I might add, at Callum’s beautiful majestic eyes.

“I see. Do you have any Supes in your family?” Callum asked

“Not that I am aware of.”

“Sookie, could you stand up and remove your shirt?” Callum asked. That question elicited a very negative response from the Viking.

“What purpose would that have?” Eric raged as he entered into a stare down with Callum.

“Calm down Viking.” Callum said calmly.

I stood up and begrudgingly took off my shirt. Luckily I had on a full coverage strapless bra, so I didn’t feel entirely naked.

Callum rose off the couch and inspected my back until he found what I guess he was looking for.

“You see right here.” He pointed to a spot on my mid back on the left side of my spine. “This is the mark of the fairy.” Callum said triumphantly.

“Explain.” Eric demanded.

“Of course. You see every fairy that has the spark is marked with a unique symbol that indicates what house they belong to.” He explained as he lifted the back of his shirt to show Eric and I where his mark was. His mark looked sort of like a fancy lowercase “t”. 

“My mark is from the house of Rowan. My people are the fire fairies. You have the royal mark of Brigant, which means that you are of the sky fairy. “Callum explained.

“Brigant!” Eric proclaimed. “You mean to tell me that Sookie is kin to Niall Brigant.” Eric said in disbelief as he paced the length of the living room.

“According to her mark, yes that is the case.” Said Callum.

“I don’t understand, why is it that there aren’t more vampires out there like you and I?” I asked Callum.

“You mean, why aren’t more fairy vampire hybrids in the world? Well that is easy. Once a vampire starts to drain a full blooded fairy, they cannot stop until the fairy is killed, thus leaving no chance to be turned. And Breandon, of the water fae, engaged into war with your kin to eliminate all half breeds, like yourself and I. How you managed to stay under the radar of Breandon is a miracle.” Callum explained.

“So what happened to Breandon? Is he still hunting half breeds?” I asked frightened that I still might be a target of psychotic fairies.

“Not exactly. Your kin defeated and killed Breandon not too long ago actually. But the portal to Faery has been closed, so there is no possible chance to make half breeds any longer. “

“And since the portal is closed, there is no chance of communicating with her kin either I assume.”  Eric stated flatly.

“There are ways, if you really want to, but I would recommend not involving yourselves in fairy politics. Fairies are devious and self-serving.”  Callum finished. Boy did that sound familiar.

“So I am a fairy and a vampire?” I asked incredulously. I couldn’t comprehend what I was being told. All my life I never felt anything more than human, well except for my telepathy, which I just boiled down to a birth defect.

“Oh you are much more than that. Eric mentioned that you are also telepathic. I can tell you that is not a fairy trait. Also, you are not just a fairy; you are fairy royalty, most likely a fairy princess.”

“This is nuts!” I exclaimed. I was exasperated.

“Oh that is not even the tip of the iceberg princess.” Callum said irreverently. Eric looked contemplative; I wondered if he was regretting agreeing to be my maker by proxy.

“Sky fairies are known to be able to harness the power of the wind and they have shape shifting abilities. What I mean by that is that you can literally change into anything you wish, be it that you simply want to change your outfit, or you want to change into an animal. Of course all fairies can teleport and summon tangible items. All fairies have the innate ability to perform magic, but you have to know the spells and how to cast them. I have brought you a very old fae book of spells. I know all of this is overwhelming to you, but if it agreeable to your maker, I would like to teach you how to harness your magic.” Callum said as he glanced over at a very hesitant looking Eric.

“That would be fine. You can stay at one of my safe houses.” Eric said diffidently. He had his arms crossed. He did not seem too happy with the situation, but I think he knew that it was the best thing for me.

“Let us go to Fangtasia, and I will have Pam show you to your living quarters.” Eric said

When we got to Fangtasia, Callum and I sat in a booth and got to know each other, while Eric sat on the throne looking bored, but still managing to eavesdrop on our conversation. Callum, as it turns out, is 533 years old. He was a quarter fairy when he was turned by his maker, who no longer lives. He lives in rural Ireland, and likes to keep to himself. He told me that he and Eric met each other while in battle.

I really liked Callum, he was fun and funny and he knew about what I was going through. He told me that I was a day walker like him, which meant that I could go outside during the daytime. He also told me that he doesn’t dare do it unless it is an emergency for fear that he will be discovered by humans and he warned me against doing it.

“So what is your relationship to the Viking?” Callum asked as he looked upon me with his striking blue eyes.

“He is my court appointed guardian.” I said sarcastically.

He laughed a little at my terminology. “So you two are not romantically involved?” He asked.

“No, we’re not.” I said with a slight hint of regret as I looked down at my hands.

“Would you like to dance princess?” Callum asked, and I couldn’t refuse, he called me princess! I loved to dance and it had been such a long time since I felt up to it.

Callum and I danced to a song that I didn’t know, but it was upbeat. I noticed Eric giving us what I referred to as the death stare. Pam looked decidedly amused.

After our dance ended, we said our goodbyes with the promise of meeting tomorrow night to start training. Pam left with Callum to take him to the safe house, and I went back to work.

I really wanted to talk to Eric about everything that had happened in the last two days, what with him almost slicing my hand off, and all the Fae developments, but he was nowhere to be found. Probably with some fangbangers I would imagine.  I walked back to his office, where I found the door closed. I could hear two people and I could feel Eric’s void. The two fangbangers were thinking some incredibly dirty thoughts, so I decided to walk away and go back to work.

Eric never emerged from his office, but the two fangbangers did. He didn’t glamour them this time, which is not the norm. I guessed that was for my benefit. They were still thinking about all the deviant sexual acts that they have just partaken in. I have to admit that it hurt my feelings a little, because I knew that was Eric’s way of getting back at me for dancing with Callum. I never realized how vindictive Eric could be when he wanted to. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EPOV

This last week has been the most torturous of my entire existence and believe me, I have been subjected to some of the most sadistic forms of torture known to man. I’ve had to sit back powerlessly and bear witness to Sookie and Callum’s constant flirtations and inane conversations. What’s worse is that Callum is actually a decent vampire, he has honor and I know that his motives for helping her are pure.

The first night Sookie and Callum trained with one another, I felt compelled to watch, however my compulsion quickly faded once I realized that there was actual attraction between the two of them. Since that first night, I have only seen that attraction grow. All the while I’m left thinking about how much I had wronged her.

The night I nearly sliced her hand off, I lost it. I was supposed to be everything to her, her protector, her friend, her confidant, her lover. In one slice of my sword, I saw everything I wanted vanish right in front of my eyes. I didn’t even have it in me to go to her, to make sure that she was alright. I was ashamed of myself for losing control like that. Only she could elicit such emotions out of me.

I wanted to go to her a thousand times since that night and explain everything to her, to tell her how much I hated myself for the way I treated her and to tell her that I had feelings for her. Instead I took fangbanger after fangbanger, all in a desperate attempt to push her away, to push my feelings for her away. When I saw her dancing merrily with the Irishman like a couple of teenagers, I took a couple of fangbangers in a jealous rage and shamelessly let them walk out of my office unglamoured knowing that Sookie would read their minds. Maybe I wanted her to feel the same degree of jealousy that I was feeling, but of course that logic was all dependant on her giving a damn about me.

Sookie and I have not spoken much in a week; our interaction consists mostly of polite yet meaningless small talk. In fact, she now spends most of her time with the Irishman, a fact that I resent wholeheartedly.

_It should be me._

Sitting on the throne at the bar, I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. She was sitting in the booth with Callum, I could overhear their conversation. She was telling him all about her family and what is was like for her growing up being telepathic. I felt my resolve to win her slowly diminish as I knew that the two of them had far more in common than she and I did. In fact he was almost like the male version of her.

I overheard him asking her to spend the day with him. I knew for a fact that they had not had sex, but I knew it was only a delay in the inevitable. She looked nervous at the implications of what he was asking her. I knew that she had never had sex with anyone willingly and that this would be her first. Although I could clearly see her nerves, I could also see her excitement and anticipation. It was at that very moment that I knew I had lost her to the fucking Irishman.

Sookie glanced over at me, knowing that she needed to ask me if she could stay with Callum. My first reaction was, of course, to deny her, but I was neither her real maker nor her lover, so I had to let her go.

“Eric, can I speak with you in private?” She asked nervously. I quickly rose from my throne and motioned for her to follow me to my office. I sat behind my desk as she took her spot in a plastic chair in front of me.

“Eric, I would like your permission to spend the day with Callum.” I noticed that it was more of a statement than a question.

“I see.” I said disappointedly, even though I already knew she was going to ask me, it still stung.

“Are you seeing him?” I asked her as my stare never moved from hers.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but yes. He is kind to me and he treats me well.” She replied. The insinuation was not lost on me. She was implying that I was not kind and that I didn’t treat her well. I couldn’t refute her claim. For the last week I have been more than unkind to her.

I didn’t want to give her my approval, because frankly knowing that she was going to sleep with him filled me with an ungodly amount of envy.  But I knew that she would only resent me if I denied her. I learned that lesson the hard way through the shifter.

To know that this beautiful, smart, powerful being was giving herself freely to someone else killed me inside. I shouldn’t have ever let it get this far and now there was nothing I could do about it. He would be the one she would smile for; he would be the one she would laugh for. He would be the recipient of her sweet affection and that sobering thought pained me more deeply than I thought possible.

How could someone so young change me so much I will never know, but I miss watching her twirl her hair around her finger as she read, the way her nose would scrunch when she would take the first sip of TruBlood, the way she would bite her lip when she was in deep thought.

As she awaited my answer with baited breath, I found myself grieving for the loss of her and the killer part was that it was all my own doing. 

“If that is what you truly wish, I cannot deny you.” I replied solemnly. She smiled austerely at my response. All I wanted to do was to take her in my arms and breathe in her intoxicatingly addictive scent.

She nodded and left my office. I slumped over my desk with my head in my hands, knowing that I just let the one person who could make my undead heart beat, walk out of my office. It was only a matter of time until she would walk out of my life as well.

Not more than a minute later, Pam barged into my office demanding to know why I let Sookie go home with Callum.

“What were you thinking? She has feelings for you, just as you do for her.” Pam exclaimed angrily. Pam and Sookie had gotten off to a rough start, but in the past month, they had become fast friends. 

“If I deny her, she will only resent me for it.” I said sadly.

“You are my maker and I will always love you, but you screwed this up royally. You have treated her like scum for the past week, all because of your petty jealousies.” She was absolutely right and I knew it.

“You think I don’t know that Pam!” I yelled in exasperation. “Just tell me how to fix it!”

“Go after her!” Pam exclaimed.

“No! This isn’t some tacky romance movie, it doesn’t work like that. She wants to be with him, I could feel it. “

“No, you are wrong, she wants to be with you, he is just second best.”  Pam slammed her hands on the desk in frustration. I didn’t want to argue with her anymore, I ordered her to close up and told her I was going home.

Since the night her training with Callum started, I couldn’t stomach fangbangers any longer, I was subsisting on TruBlood. It wasn’t really for her benefit; I was just disgusted with the lot of them. When I got home, I grabbed a bottle and morosely went into Sookie’s room. I just wanted to feel close to her, it didn’t feel right coming home without her.

I sat on her bed, looking around her room. She had really made the space hers and I regretted not taking the time to notice all the small things about her life. On the side table sat a picture of her and her grandmother. Sookie looked like she was still a teenager in the photo. She looked so incredibly happy and innocent. I wished more than anything that I could take the pain away from her to be able to see her smile like she did and see the light return back to her eyes like they did in that photo.

I went into my day chamber to die for the day, the only thing on my mind was the regret that I was feeling for treating Sookie the way that I had. I hoped that I would have the opportunity to make it up to her, even if that meant waiting until her tryst with Callum ended.

Waking up to an empty house was an unbearable feeling, I never realized how lonely my existence was until Sookie came into my life.  It angered me to no end knowing that she had spent the day with him, probably fucking all over the house. Another advantage he had over me, he could spend the day with her and she would not be lonely in the daytime hours waiting for me to rise.

I arrived at Fangtasia, and I was in a very dark mood. The vermin would be lucky if I didn’t kill one of them tonight. I looked around the main area, but I didn’t see Callum or Sookie, I assumed they were training, or fucking. I headed straight to my office and shut the door. Tonight I would deal with area business, since I was basically useless to my bar.

After about an hour of dealing with inane paperwork that the Queen required of me, I heard some sounds coming from the basement. I didn’t have any prisoners, so I went to investigate who, other than Pam or I, would dare go down there.

Before I could get to the basement, I saw Callum walk out and head to the bar area. He reeked of Sookie and sex and it enraged me. I went out to the bar area to find out what the hell he thought he was doing. Callum picked up a fangbanger and took her back to the basement area. The slimy Fuck! Was Sookie not enough for him?

I waited a few minutes before I barged in on him. I intended to catch him in the act. But when I descended the stairs to the basement, all I saw was Sookie feeding off the fangbanger. She once told me that she didn’t feel comfortable feeding on humans unless I was around, so the sight of her doing it with Callum saddened me more than it should have.

“How did you get here?” I asked both of them.

“We teleported.” She responded proudly. I hadn’t noticed how much her skills had developed, mainly because she didn’t share the details with me anymore and I stopped watching her train.

She was wearing the same clothes she left in last night, and they smelled of their collective juices. My sadness turned to blinding rage in that moment, but I knew it was completely misplaced. I was angry at myself for letting her slip through my fingers. How fucking ironic was it that the man I called in to help her ended up taking her from me.

“Eric, can we speak privately?” Sookie asked. This was not a good sign, last time she wanted to speak privately she basically asked my permission to fuck Callum.

“Yes, let’s go to my office.” I said sternly. I followed behind her up the stairs, which was not pleasant for me; I actually closed off my olfactory receptor because her scent was torturous.

I shut the door to my office and stood behind my desk facing her. She looked so beautiful despite having his scent all over her.

She crossed her arms defensively and began to speak. “Callum has to go back home next week.” She started. I prayed to the gods that she was not asking me if she could go with him.

“What does that have to do with me?” I asked tersely.

“He asked me to go with him.” She said as she nervously tapped her finger on her forearm. She was looking down at her feet, so I knew that she was nervous. 

“I see. And are you asking permission to go with him?” I replied. I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. She didn’t know what she wanted; I could pick that up from her body language.

“I, uh, I don’t know. I mean I’m nothing but an inconvenience to you, so part of me thinks it’s for the best.” She said as she continued to stare at her feet. I felt incredibly hurt that she would think of herself as nothing but an inconvenience.

“Sookie, look at me.” I demanded. I was going to put an end to this right now.

“You are not an inconvenience. You are a breath of fresh air. Besides, I couldn’t let you leave even if I wanted to.” That didn’t come out exactly like I had hoped. I wanted to convey to her that I would miss her, that I cared deeply for her, and that I wanted her.

“So that’s it huh. You can’t let me go because you would look like a bad maker in the eyes of the Queen and the AVL.” She huffed angrily as she continued her rant. “Well you are a bad maker, I mean you nearly cut my arm off and didn’t even have the decency to come and check on me. Oh and believe me I know you left those fangbangers unglamoured for my benefit. You are petty, vindictive and jealous!” She seethed. She was unleashing all of her pent up anger on me, and I deserved it, but I couldn’t allow her to get away with the blatant disrespect.

“You will watch your tone with me!” I growled warningly. “I readily admit that I have made mistakes where you are concerned, but I am not a bad maker.” I said and I heard her make a groaning disbelieving noise.

“I have never experienced this level of emotion in my entire existence. Fuck Feelings!” I yelled. How could I look her in the eye and tell her how much I cared for her when she clearly hated me.  She just looked at me with a shocked expression.

We both stood in stunned silence each waiting for the other to say something, until I finally broke the silence in a grave tone.

“Do you want to be with him?” I asked dejectedly.

“Does it matter what I want?” she said and she wasn’t being sarcastic. I could tell there was some hidden emotion behind her words.

“Yes. Tell me what you want.” I demanded softly.  I hoped that her answer would be me, but hope was a fleeting emotion for me.

“That night, when we burned down Compton’s house.” She paused, stealing uneasy glances in my direction as she nervously explained herself. “That night, I was broken. Knowing that you saw those videos first hand humiliated me. I didn’t want you, of all people, to see that. I feared that you would see me as damaged goods. You were there for me that night, but after that you became distant. That’s when I knew that you would never see me as more than just a pitiful pet project from the AVL and the Queen. I needed you, but you refused to let me in in more than just a superficial way.“ I started to interrupt her to explain that I had never meant to be so cold to her, but she put her hand up effectively stopping me.

“No, let me finish. Please. Callum has been there for me. I told him all about the torture and the sexual acts, but he never flinched, he never made me feel ashamed. He comforted me, cared for me and showed me that there is life beyond torture. I feel comfortable with him.” She finished glumly, but I didn’t buy that she had any real feelings for him.

“I never meant to isolate you like that. I thought we were growing closer until that night when the shifter kissed you. Yes I was jealous, you told me that you loved him! And yes I took a fangbanger that bore your resemblance. I lost my entire ability to think rationally, hell I almost cut your goddamn hand off. I am ashamed of myself for the way I treated you in the last week. I would give anything to take it all back and re-do it. And now you tell me that you basically hate me and want to leave me.” I pleaded with her.

“I don’t love Sam like that. He’s like a brother to me.” She said quietly.

“I don’t know how to resolve this Sookie, but I’m in hell right now, a hell that I created for myself. We will work this out I swear, just please tell me that you want to stay with me.” I begged, fucking begged. Thousand year old Viking vampire sheriff and I was begging a 21 year old vampire to stay with me.

“I never wanted to leave in the first place, but I’m not going to stop seeing Callum at least not until I have to.” She said more confidently. And for the first time in a week, I felt optimistic. I would see to it that I change her mind about continuing to see Callum.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

Callum and I had trained for about a week, and I was starting to come into my own as far as my powers were concerned. Callum was a great teacher, since he had already experienced everything that I was currently going through. He was patient with me and taught me some great techniques for teleportation, summoning, and shapeshifting.

One night, I was even able to make the wind pick up pretty significantly. Out of all of my newfound abilities, the one that I liked the best was the ability to summon items to me. The only problem with it was that it had to be tangible, meaning that I couldn’t just dream up something, it had to be something currently in existence. Callum brought his laptop out one night and pulled up the Saks Fifth Avenue website, and I found a very pretty white satin dress that I wanted. With his help, I was able to summon the dress to me. I thought about Pam, and how she would just love me for this particular ability.

I felt guilty for overusing that ability since I felt like I was stealing. I was a humble girl, so I didn’t really feel the need to have such extravagant possessions, but I still loved that I could do it.

Teleportation is a really odd feeling. You feel tingly all over and it’s almost like the life is being sucked out of you, but the feeling only lasts a millisecond until you arrive to your destination. Callum told me the key is that you have to know exactly where you want to go and in order to do that you had to have seen the place before either physically or in your mind.

With every power, there are weaknesses; one cannot be too powerful elsewise the balance of the universe would be off, at least that’s what Callum said. I guess it’s for that reason that using my abilities makes me incredibly weak, and when I am weak I become vulnerable to an attack. Callum told me he rarely uses his abilities because of how weak it makes him.

Eric watched our training session the first night, but I noticed that he felt a little left out. He never stayed for another session. I felt bad about that, I didn’t want to exclude him from such a big part of my life. Apart from more recent incidences, I was actually growing incredibly fond of Eric. His care and concern for me, however, was overshadowed by his petty jealousy.

Callum and I started growing closer by the day. We had so much in common, we could keep each other company during the day, and we could practice our abilities with one another. I could tell that he led a pretty lonely existence in Ireland, mostly keeping to himself. He said he hadn’t been in a relationship with anyone in over 400 years, but he did admit to taking random bedmates on occasion.

It was the end of our first week of training together and we were scheduled to be at Fangtasia in an hour. We had just finished practicing teleportation, when Callum told me that he could only spend one more week here with me. He said that he had some important obligations to attend to back home, but he didn’t elaborate on what those obligations were.

For the most part, Callum’s life was sort of a mystery to me. He told me that he spent a lot of time alone, but he never explained what he did with himself in his free time.

“Come stay with me for a while.” Callum pleaded. I was shocked when he asked me that. We had grown close, sure, but not that close. Certainly not close enough to leave Jason, Sam and to some extent Eric.

“I..I can’t do that.” I stammered.

“Why not, Eric won’t miss you. You’re nothing to him, he doesn’t understand you the way I do. Sookie we are one in the same.” He said indignantly. I automatically felt the need to defend Eric. Although I didn’t exactly know what I was to Eric, I knew I wasn’t nothing. He took such good care of me the night of the trial and the night at Compton’s house. If I was nothing to him, he wouldn’t have cared enough to try to kiss me.

“I can’t leave my brother and Sam, they are my family.” I huffed in exasperation. I had told Callum a lot about my childhood and working at Merlotte’s so he knew how much I loved my family. I also chose to ignore his comments about Eric.

He looked at me disappointingly but I think he understood my reasoning. Truth is, even without the excuses, I’m not sure that I would want to go stay with him. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy having company during the day, but spending 24 hours a day 7 days a week for all eternity with the same person just seemed a little bit too claustrophobic to me.  

I would miss Callum still, it was nice to have someone close to commiserate with. I liked Callum, he was kind and understanding and most of all patient.

“I understand Sookie, really I do, but I find that I will...miss you deeply.” He said with quiet passion. Then he pulled me to him and placed his lips on mine. At first the kiss was reverent and filled with longing, but it quickly deepened into a more passionate need. His tongue massaging my own in a sinfully lustful way that made my lower half blaze with need.

I pulled away from his embrace and stared into his beautiful blue eyes.  We had innocently flirted, sure, but I was wholly unprepared for the kiss. It was passionate, and if I were a normal person, I would have let it move to something more physical, but I had not been intimate with anyone willingly in my entire life dead or undead. This was a huge step for me, one that I was unsure that I was ready to take.

“We need to go to Fangtasia, Eric is expecting me.” I said as I stepped away from Callum’s embrace.

As it turned out, I was not needed behind the bar tonight, so I sat in Eric’s booth with Callum. He was asking me about my family, and I told him the basics. Parents died when I was young, went to live with my grandmother, only have a brother left, etc…

I could feel Callum’s eyes bore deeply into mine, his eyes filled with lust and need. He wanted me, he hoped that something would have happened earlier when we kissed. I could tell that he wanted to ask me something.

He grabbed my hand and rubbed small circles on my palm with his thumb as he looked me in the eyes.

“Princess, would you consider staying with me tonight? We could spend the whole day together.” He asked gently and full of hope. I knew he would ask that eventually, and I also knew that he was hoping to take whatever relationship we had formed one step further. I was not entirely against getting physical with him, but I was nervous about it and scared at the same time.

“I will need to ask my maker for permission.” I said meekly and gave him a slight smile. Some part of me was hoping that Eric would say no, that way I wouldn’t have to face my fears and confront my past experiences. Besides that, shouldn’t I be more excited at the prospect of having sex with a gorgeous man? Oddly enough, I found myself wanting it to be Eric who asked me what Callum had just asked.

Despite his attitude last week, I have come to the realization that he has never not gotten what he has wanted and I was slowly beginning to realize that what he wanted was me. For what, that remains to be seen, but that would explain his irrational jealousy.

I left Callum sitting in the booth while I walked over to Eric. He was sitting on the throne but he watched my every more as I came closer and closer to him.

“Eric, can I speak with you in private?” I asked apprehensively. He must have heard my earlier exchange with Callum because he seemed to know what I was going to ask before i asked. I could tell this because he let out an unnecessary sigh and I noticed a hint of defeat in his facial expression.

I followed him to his office where I perched myself in front of his desk. We stared at each other for a good minute before I broke the silence.

“Eric, I would like your permission to spend the day with Callum.” I didn’t ask him if I could spend the day with Callum. I had a feeling it didn’t matter anyway he would just say no.

“I see.” He said in defeat. He looked as if I told him I was moving to Australia or something.

“Are you seeing him?” he asked as he stared in my eyes measuring each movement I made as if he were trying to gauge my feelings for Callum.

“Not that it’s any of your business, but yes. He is kind to me and he treats me well.” I exaggerated. Callum and I weren’t seeing each other per se, we were flirting and that was about the extent of it. Why I lied to him? I don’t know, maybe I subconsciously wanted him to be jealous enough to deny my request. It was silly of me to agree to spend the day with Callum, knowing that I really wasn’t ready for whatever physical relationship he wanted from me.

Eric sat back in his chair contemplatively tenting his fingers as he stared at me for a while. Whatever emotions or feelings he had were lost on me, his faced gave nothing away.

As I sat there awaiting his answer, I found myself wishing I could turn back the hands of time. If I could, I would go back to the night after we burned down Compton’s house, I would have done things so much differently. I would have made my relationship with Sam clear to Eric. I would have done more to get to know Eric, to spend time with him.

Bringing me out of my musings, Eric solemnly said. “If that is what you truly wish, I cannot deny you.”

That was not what I truly wished for, what I wished for was for Eric and I to be okay, things between us had gotten so messed up, so much so that I was not sure they could be repaired.

I nodded at him in appreciation and left his office. I found Callum sitting in the same spot I left him. He appeared to be in downtime. I nudged his shoulder slightly smiling at him nervously. He understood that Eric had given his approval, so he got up and grabbed my hand entwining his fingers in mine as we left the club.

I noticed Pam watching our movement carefully; she actually scowled at me as we walked out. I know that she wanted me to be with her maker, but she also had to understand that Eric had not exactly gone about things the right way.

As we got into Callum’s rental car, he had a look of excitement plastered across his face. I found myself wishing that I could mirror his expressions, but I found that I just couldn’t.

Callum put his hand on my knee as we drove silently to one of Eric’s safe houses that he allowed Callum to use. The irony of the situation was not at all lost on me. I had driven away from Eric in the arms of someone who Eric had summoned to help me with my skills. Not only that, but we were going to one of Eric’s domains presumably to have sex. I could see how Eric would be jealous, if the roles were reversed, I don’t know how I would handle the situation.

Callum’s hand never moved from my knee, so I didn’t protest the contact. I had not told Callum anything about my torture or the fact that sex was an extremely touchy subject for me due to my past experiences with Uncle Bartlett and Bill. Somehow I knew the subject would eventually come up tonight.

As we arrived to the house Callum was staying in, the first thing I noticed about the house was that it was very much Eric. The wall colors, the artwork, the coffee table book of Vikings. Everything about this house screamed Eric. I found it very difficult to think of Callum when I was surrounded by Eric. He even had swords mounted to the walls.

Callum and I sat on the couch, which was an oversized soft brown leather couch with Mahogany inlays, so very Eric. Callum looked at me expectantly; he had his body leaning into mine as if he was going to pounce on me. He put his hand on my knee again, and if I had a heart, it would be beating out of my chest. I was in full on vampire panic attack mode.

Callum gently put his hand on my cheek, leading my face to meet his.

“What has you so nervous Princess?” He said gently. How could I explain this to him without coming across as completely damaged.

“Look Callum, I may not be that experienced, but I know what agreeing to go home with a guy means. I need to tell you something and I don’t want you to react badly to it.” I said cautiously and I clenched and unclenched my fists nervously.

“You know you can tell me anything princess.” I was starting to hate the fact that he called me princess all the time. I remember my father calling me that all the time as a child.

“Alright, well. I need you to know that I have never ever had sex…willingly.” I said ashamedly looking away from him.

“Fuck Sookie! That is horrible! How did that… What… Who… I will murder them.” He stammered angrily. I wasn’t sure if I liked his reaction, but I certainly liked the fact that he was willing to kill whoever wronged me in that way.

“Without going into details, the people responsible are no longer alive.” I was able to reign in my emotions a little better with this response.

“People?” he said furiously.

“Yes, please, I don’t want to make a big deal about it, but you can understand my trepidations with what’s going on between us.” I really didn’t want to get into it with him. The only person that I would ever allow the details would be Eric, and that was only because he saw first-hand thanks to the disgusting videos.

“Sookie, I would never hurt you. I promise you this; whatever happens between us will be because he both want it to happen. I will make sure that you are comfortable and happy.” He said taking my hand in his as he gently brushed back the hair from my face.

I was touched by his words, but honestly I didn’t expect anything less from him. He really was an honorable vampire and he really wanted to have me as a companion.

He placed gently kisses on my forehead and we sat on the couch. With each passing moment, Callum added more physical contact all in an attempt to make me feel comfortable.

He placed soft kisses along my jawline then his lips met mine in a soft kiss that was meant to ease my mind. I found that I wanted to see where this went, so I parted my lips allowing our kiss to deepen slightly. Callum’s tongue met mine for the second time tonight. I was less nervous this time, because I knew how he kissed. Callum had one hand placed gently on the nape of my neck while his other hand rubbed my body lengthwise along the side of my body. When his hand would brush over the side of my breast, I found myself turned on and wanting for more contact.

I encouraged him on by placing my hands around his neck. Slowly I felt his hand snake up my shirt in an attempt to remove the offending article. I lifted my hands above my head granting him permission. We sat on the couch like a couple of teenagers making out, me topless and him fully clothed. A fact that I quickly remedied by removing his shirt while he unclasped my bra.

He looked at my topless form in wonder and reverence. “How beautiful you are princess.” He said breathily and began to kiss his way down my body spending lots of time making sure my breasts were given the amount of attention that they deserved.

He slowly kissed down my stomach until he reached the button on my jeans.I was okay with the intimacy between us, up until this point.  I felt incredibly uncomfortable when he began to unbutton my jeans and he took notice.

“Sookie, it’s okay. You tell me when you want me to stop.” He assured me, and I reluctantly let him continue to remove my pants. I sat before him in nothing but white laced panties and I had never felt so vulnerable, not since the abuse at the hands of my uncle started.

He kissed my thighs and further down my leg for the longest time, and I sat nervously propped up on the couch by my elbows watching each of his attentions carefully. I was not able to just give up control of my body and just feel. I was too busy being too frightened and uncomfortable to be able to really enjoy anything he was doing with my body. My mind was screaming at me to stop him, but I also had to come to terms with the fact that I was a vampire. How many vampires out there are repulsed by sex? None, that’s how many. It’s for that reason that I thought I could go through with it. I thought if I just do it once, it would make everything okay somehow.

As he kissed his way back up to my heated center, he tugged at the side of my panties effectively removing them. My last bit of cover was taken and I felt naked. Well I was naked literally, but I felt naked emotionally. As soon as he removed my panties, I immediately and subconsciously crossed my legs at the ankle creating a barrier.

He noticed my defensive position and tried to reassure me that he would not hurt me. He asked me several times if I wanted to stop. Each time I said no, reluctantly. I almost just wanted to hurry up and get it over just so I didn’t have to deal with it anymore.  

Callum gently broke apart my ankles and spread my legs so that he could kiss his way back up to my center.

He stroked my thigh with one hand and he began to kissed my belly button. His other hand began to slowly brush my folds. This caused me to gasp. The sudden memories of Bill came flooding back to me, but I didn’t pull away from Callum instead I froze. I tried as best as I could to suppress whatever negative reaction I was having, but I was unable. I reverted back to handling the situation as if it were Bill in front of me. I blocked my mind from what was happening physically. I pictured myself in my happy place, lying on the beach soaking up the sun.  My mind had totally detached itself from my physical body and I said nothing as Callum continued unaware of my internal struggle and revulsion.

Callum gently inserted a finger into my folds and I found myself cringing at the feel. I bit the inside of my cheek to the point that I began to bleed, but I was not going to cry. It was sort of a mantra in my head, don’t cry…don’t cry…Lying on the beach…tanning my body… I just kept repeating silently.

Before I knew what was happening, Callum had began to kiss my center with his tongue. I felt absolutely no pleasure at all in that, in fact, I hated it but I made no motion to stop him.

He seemed to be enjoying the taste of me. “Mmm, you taste so sweet.” He moaned in a voice deeper than his normal tone. I’m glad one of us was enjoying themselves.

I cringed, when he rubbed my nub with his thumb. I felt like such a freak. Any other woman, human or vampire, would love this, but I found myself feeling disgusted.

I didn’t want to hurt his feelings, nor did I want to seem like a damaged freak, so I moaned along with him, pretending to enjoy his touch.

I felt like a horrible person, it wasn’t his fault that I couldn’t enjoy myself, I guess I just wasn’t over all the sexual abuse that I had gone through. I should have spoken up, but it had been so ingrained in me that when a man touched me I had no choice but to let him.

In an odd moment of clarity, I decided that I needed to talk to a professional about my issues.

“Oh Sookie, I’m gonna come.” He moaned and I felt his wetness hit my lower thigh. I found myself relieved that it was over, and I wasn’t sure how he managed to find any pleasure in what we had just done. He lifted me off the couch and carried me to the master bedroom. I was too emotionally dazed to care where we were going and for the first time since my maker died, I found myself wanting to sleep.

He put me down on Eric’s California King size bed, in Eric’s master bedroom. Looking around the room that was just so Eric, I found that he was all I could think about. I wanted to go home, be in my own room in my own bed where I felt safe and invulnerable. Since it was past dawn, I knew he would be in his daytime rest, but that didn’t change the fact that that was where I wanted to be.

I didn’t need to sleep, but that is exactly what I did. Callum didn’t say anything to me, he just cuddled up next to me draping his arm over my body. He was trying to be comforting to me, and I thoroughly appreciated it.

When I woke, it was just about dark outside, and I wanted to go straight to Fangtasia, but looking at Callum I could tell he really wanted to talk about what happened.

“Sookie, are you alright? You…slept, all day?” he asked worriedly. I appreciated the fact that he was worried about me, but I was kind of in a dark place.

“I’m fine.” I replied coldly. “We need to go to Fangtasia.”

“I know. “ and I noticed that he had not showered, I wondered if he intended to.

“Sookie, would you please consider coming to live with me?” He asked again. I knew that I was in no place emotionally to go off with a guy to presumably be in a relationship with. Hell I could barely stand being intimate with him, through no fault of his own of course.

“I still don’t think it’s a good idea. I’m just not ready for that.” I said honestly. I needed to start standing up for myself more, make my feelings known. I should have done that last night, I should have stopped Callum the minute I felt uncomfortable, but it was so ingrained in me from all the years of abuse to just grin and bear it.

“We really should be going.” I said changing the subject.

Callum decided that we should teleport since it seemed like I was in such a hurry to get there.

He held my hand and I felt that tingly feeling. We both pictured the basement and envisioned ourselves there. A millisecond later, I opened my eyes and we were at out chosen destination.

I had never teleported that far before, so I felt incredibly weak, but I was still proud of myself for being able to do it. I found, however, that I was so weak that my knees couldn’t support my own weight.

Callum seemed to fair better than I did, perhaps because of his age, regardless he took notice of my weakened state and rushed to my side effectively supporting me.

“You are too weak. I’m gonna go get you some blood.” He said concerned for my wellbeing. He gently sat me on the ground as he ran upstairs to get some blood. I wasn’t sure if he meant the bottled or live variety.

After a moment or so, Callum came back downstairs with a female fangbanger. I felt awkward feeding on a live donor without Eric. The only time I ever fed on a fangbanger, Eric was there watching me the whole time to make sure that I didn’t lose control and drain one dry. I trusted Eric in that regard and he never let me down. Somehow feeding without him felt …wrong.

Regardless of my feelings, I needed the blood, because I was just too weak.

“Please make sure nothing happens to the girl.” I asked Callum, and he understood what I meant.

I extended my fangs and bit into her neck. Pull after pull, she sated my hunger and I felt a lot stronger. I only stopped because I heard the door open and close. I looked up from the girl and saw Eric watching my every move.

I saw disappointment flash across his face and I knew that he was a little put off that I was feeding without him. I know that I had been excluding him from my life a lot lately, but none of it was intentional and I certainly didn’t do it to hurt him.

“How did you get here?” Eric chided us.

“We teleported.” I proclaimed proudly. I wanted him to be proud of me too. He really wasn’t aware of all the things I could do, mainly because he stopped watching me and never asked about it.

I noticed Eric eyeing me up and down, apparently checking out the clothes I was wearing; he must have noticed that I hadn’t changed clothes. He sniffed me too. Bastard. Definitely checking to see if Callum and I had sex. He would, no doubt, assume that we did.

In that moment, I felt the need to talk to him one on one. I don’t know why, but I wanted him to know that Callum had asked me to move away with him. I guess I wanted him to realize that I had other offers, that I wasn’t little orphan Annie. I wanted to get some kind of reaction out of him, begging me to stay, proclaiming how he had wronged me.  I just wanted him to want me.

“Eric, can we speak privately?”  I asked.

“Yes, let’s go to my office.” He replied coldly, he was angry with the way I smelled, of that I knew for certain.

I walked into his office, expecting him to yell at me for smelling the way I did, so I crossed my arms across my chest in a defensive manner.

“Callum has to go home next week.” I stated flatly, still acting defensive.

“What does that have to do with me?” he replied pithily.

“He asked me to go with him.” I said nervously. I didn’t tell him that I had no intentions of going, but I just wanted a reaction out of him. 

“I see. And are you asking permission to go with him?” He replied in defeat.

“I, uh, I don’t know. I mean I’m nothing but an inconvenience to you, so part of me thinks it’s for the best.” I said as I stared at my feet. It was true that i felt like I inconvenienced him. I knew he didn’t ask to have me, that I was forced upon him by his queen. 

“Sookie, look at me.” He demanded. 

“You are not an inconvenience. You are a breath of fresh air. Besides, I couldn’t let you leave even if I wanted to.” He said. I didn’t understand if he was telling me he wanted me, but he definitely insinuated that I was with him by order of the queen. I fumed at that response.

“So that’s it huh. You can’t let me go because you would look like a bad maker in the eyes of the Queen and the AVL.” I huffed angrily as I continued my rant. “Well you are a bad maker, I mean you nearly cut my arm off and didn’t even have the decency to come and check on me. Oh and believe me I know you left those fangbangers unglamoured for my benefit. You are petty, vindictive and jealous!” I seethed. I was unleashing all of the pent up anger I had built over that last week. After I said it, though I immediately regretted calling him a bad maker. He wasn’t a bad maker, in fact he was a very good one. I never went without anything I needed, he treated me a thousand times better than Compton, sure we had our issues, but they had nothing to do with his ability as a maker. I didn’t regret anything else I said though.

“You will watch your tone with me!” He growled warningly. “I readily admit that I have made mistakes where you are concerned, but I am not a bad maker.” I groaned at his comment about making mistakes. He had made quite a lot of mistakes where I was concerned, like almost cutting off my hand because he was angry with me about Sam.

“I have never experienced this level of emotion in my entire existence. Fuck Feelings!” He yelled. I was becoming exasperated with him. He just admitted he had feelings for me, but in the same manner he was telling me that he hated that fact.

I was shocked by his admission, but I didn’t know how to respond, so we both stared at each other until he broke the silence.

“Do you want to be with him?” He asked dejectedly while staring into my eyes.

“Does it matter what I want?” I said. I wasn’t trying to be a smart ass, I really wanted to know if he cared about my wants.

“Yes. Tell me what you want.” He demanded softly and I could tell he sincerely wanted to know. It was almost as if he just didn’t know how to be around me although he wanted to. I decided then to tell him where I felt things went wrong. 

“That night, when we burned down Compton’s house.” I paused, glaring at him uneasily as I nervously explained myself. “That night, I was broken. Knowing that you saw those videos first hand humiliated me. I didn’t want you, of all people, to see that. I feared that you would see me as damaged goods. You were there for me that night, but after that you became distant. That’s when I knew that you would never see me as more than just a pitiful pet project from the AVL and the Queen. I needed you, but you refused to let me in in more than just a superficial way.“ He started to interrupt me.

“No, let me finish. Please. Callum has been there for me. I told him all about the torture and the sexual acts, but he never flinched, he never made me feel ashamed. He comforted me, cared for me and showed me that there is life beyond torture. I feel comfortable with him.” I embellished. I don’t know why I lied about Callum and my relationship. I hadn’t told him everything, I told him the bare minimum. I embellished because I wanted him to realize how he had treated me and that others could and would treat me better.

“I never meant to isolate you like that. I thought we were growing closer until that night when the shifter kissed you. Yes I was jealous, you told me that you loved him! And yes I took a fangbanger that bore your resemblance. I lost my entire ability to think rationally, hell I almost cut your goddamn hand off. I am ashamed of myself for the way I treated you in the last week. I would give anything to take it all back and re-do it. And now you tell me that you basically hate me and want to leave me.” He pleaded with me and I finally felt like I was getting inside him. Sure I shouldn’t have lied about my relationship with Callum, but in my defense, I was trying to get him to open up to me.

“I don’t love Sam like that. He’s like a brother to me.” I didn’t realize that his jealousy all started because he thought I loved Sam. If only I could turn back time and make it clear from the get go.  

“I don’t know how to resolve this Sookie, but I’m in hell right now, a hell that I created for myself. We will work this out I swear, just please tell me that you want to stay with me.” That broke my heart a little. I didn’t realize he was feeling that way.

“I never wanted to leave in the first place, but I’m not going to stop seeing Callum at least not until I have to.” I should have clarified that a little. Callum was my trainer, and in that regard I would not stop seeing him, but it had already been proven that I couldn’t be with him, not romantically at least. But I didn’t. I thought I could clear that up with him at home, after I spoke with Callum.

I left Eric’s office after that feeling emotionally drained, but I knew I still needed to speak with Callum about last night.

I went out to the bar area to find Callum sitting with Pam. She was looking at him murderously, but it didn’t look like they were actually speaking.

I sat in the booth next to Callum across from Pam. She was definitely hating our proximity.

“Pam, can you please excuse Callum and I?” I asked politely. She made some kind of angry hmph sound and left us alone.

I got up and went to sit across from him, so that we could see eye to eye. I was angry at myself for letting the situation with Callum progress the way it had. I should have kept it strictly professional. He was my teacher and nothing more.

“I don’t know if you picked up on it, but last night I had a full on panic attack. I tried to be with you, really I did. I am just too messed up to be with anyone right now.” I said dejectedly. I was resigned to get some counseling and until that happened, I had no business being with anyone.

“Princess. I knew, I mean I felt your trepidations, but I didn’t think it was that bad.” He said questioningly.

“I know. I tried as hard as I could to shield you from my feelings. It’s just…I am just so messed up.” I confessed and I wanted to cry, but I steeled myself. I hated vampire tears.

“You are not messed up princess. You are…” he said, but I cut him off angrily.

“I AM MESSED UP!” I yelled. He had no idea as to the extent of my abuse. Realizing that I was screaming at him unnecessarily, I lowered my voice and continued still angry but more so at myself. “I can’t even stand to be touched. I cringed when you put your hands in me, I cringed when your tongue entered me.” I whispered crossly. “Don’t you understand, none of this is your fault, it’s me, I’m so fucked up.” I whispered as I put my head in my hands in anguish.

“Sookie look at me.” He said and I lifted my head to meet his. “Why didn’t you say something?  I feel like such an asshole.”  He looked angry at himself.

“Like I said. It’s not your fault, I just, I just need time.” I said mournfully. As much as I wanted to be done with Bill, it seemed like there was always some residual issue that I just couldn’t get over. I wanted to be the strong Sookie that showed up to the trial, I wanted to be normal, but that was never in the cards for me.

Just as I was delving deeper and deeper into my own self-loathing, Eric walked up to the table. I suppose he had heard most, if not all of our conversation.

“I’m taking you home.” Eric said demandingly, but still gentle. I looked up at him and saw nothing but concern and care. Callum looked as though he wanted to say something, but he chose to stay silent.

Eric lifted me gently from the booth and led me out to his car. He opened the door for me and made sure I got in before he closed the door behind me.

I didn’t look at him the entire ride. I wasn’t sure how much of the conversation he heard. I was humiliated over what happened with Callum and the fact that I yelled at him in the bar.

“How much did you hear?” I asked timidly while looking at my fidgeting hands.

“Enough to know that I should not have let you leave with him last night.”  He said carefully. He put his hand in mine, and it felt like that night at Compton’s all over again.

“You weren’t being honest with me when you told me about your relationship with Callum.” He stated flatly.

“No, I wasn’t.” I said shamefully and he released my hand. If he was angry with me, I couldn’t tell.

“Sookie, this communication problem we have between the two of us is ripping us apart.” I couldn’t disagree with him. I had embellished the truth and he flat out omitted it.

“I wasn’t lying when I said I was messed up. I, I owe you the truth. I know that.” I said sadly. “Callum wants us to be more, but I just cant. He did ask me to move with him, but I don’t want to.” I confessed.

“And last night?” he asked cautiously and I felt his gaze intently on mine.

“Yeah, I should’ve never gone with him.” I admitted forlornly.

“Did he force you?” Eric fumed.

“NO, no nothing like that. In fact he told me that he would stop anytime I felt uncomfortable. But.” I gulped unnecessarily willing some courage to come forth.

“So you had sex with him even though you didn’t want to.” He stated angrily.

“Not exactly, I mean we didn’t have sex, he sort of, I guess you could say he went down on me.” God this was embarrassing, why I was even telling him all this was beyond me.

“But you felt uncomfortable.” He stated questioningly.

“Yes, God. Alright. This is so fucking embarrassing!” I exclaimed.

“I’m not trying to embarrass you, Sookie, I’m just trying to get to the root of what had you so upset.” He said calmly and I knew he was just trying to help me, but that did nothing to quell the humiliation or the anger I had for myself.

“Fine you want to know, I’ll tell you. He went down on me, I hated it. I fucking hated it. I pictured Compton the entire time, I felt dirty and ashamed the entire time and I did nothing to stop it because I am a fucking coward! I hate myself for reacting that way. “ I shouted angrily. I continued my rant. “I’m never going to escape him am I?” I whispered exhaustively and I started to cry. Dammit, I started to cry!

Eric pulled the car over to the median. He got out of the car and came to my side pulling me out of the car and into his embrace.

“Sookie, we will get through this.” He wiped the tears from my face and brushed my hair back calming me down from my near hysterics.

He put me back in the car and we went home. I was quiet the whole time, and he let me be.  By the time we got home, there was still about three hours left until dawn, not that it mattered to me. Eric walked with me to my room making sure that I was alright.

“I’m going to run you a bath.” He whispered and I nodded my head in agreement. That actually sounded divine.

After a few moments, he came back in the room and let me know my bath was ready. He didn’t go in the bathroom with me, he was respecting my space and I truly appreciated him for that. I slipped off my clothes and got in the tub. The lavender did wonders to help calm me. After a few moments of being in the tub, I found myself wishing Eric was there to talk.

“Eric?” I called out. And within a few seconds he came in the bathroom.

“Everything alright?” he asked worriedly.

“Yeah, I just wondered if you would stay in here with me?” I felt like a scared little child.

“Of course I will.” He said and he took the bottle of shampoo and began to wash my hair for me. He massaged my scalp better than any world class professional masseuse.

“Mmm. That feels nice.” I said peacefully as he continued his movements.

“Sookie, I need you to be completely honest with me at all times. We have to trust one another. I know that things have gotten fucked up between us, but why can’t we just wipe the slate clean.” He said soothingly. I wanted that more than anything.

“I agree. I’m sorry for calling you a bad maker, I really didn’t mean it.” I apologized.

“Sookie, we have both made some very bad mistakes. I want you to share your life and your problems with me. We can fix them together.” I smiled at his sentiments. He was right, we both were so used to dealing with our problems on our own that it didn’t occur to us that we could rely on each other.

“That sounds nice. Did you know I can summon things?” I said lightening the somber mood.

“You are a powerful being Sookie. What else have you discovered?” he said proudly. I went down the list of my powers and he seemed glad that I was sharing with him.

“I need help Eric. Professional help.” I admitted shamefully.

“It takes a brave person to admit their weaknesses, it takes an even braver person to do something about them. I will call Dr. Ludwig tomorrow and see if she has any recommendations.” He said soothingly as he rinsed the shampoo from my hair. I loved the gentleness of the moment, and I wished that we had more moments like that.

“You know Sookie, I have experienced something similar to what you are going through. Would you be willing to hear my story?” He asked. I was shocked but at the same time honored that he would choose to share his story with me.

“Of course.” I stated respectfully.

“Alright. I was turned by my maker, Appius Livius Ocella. He was a brute of a man. He collected children as a hobby, much like a stamp or coin collector. He was an indiscriminant sadist when it came to both his sexual appetites and his punishments.

The night I rose from being turned, I was, of course, confused and disoriented. I hadn’t known what happened to me.

“Who are you?” I asked of my maker.

“You will show me the respect that I deserve, now get on your knees and pleasure me.” My maker demanded. I had never done that in my entire life, I had only ever been with women. Of course feeling violated by his demands, I refused him.

“I will do no such thing!” I rebuked him. I had no idea the power and influence a maker could have over their child. That was a lesson I learned the hard way.

“Get on your knees and pleasure me! As your maker I command you!” he screamed. I tried with all my being to just run away from the mad man, but I found that it was a compulsion that I could not resist. Before I knew what was happening to me, my mouth was around my maker’s cock, and I had no ability to stop whatsoever. I felt humiliated and shamed and when it was over, he commanded me to do it again. The next night was worse. He sodomized me from dusk til dawn, and I was powerless.

I had never wanted to die more in my life. I was a warrior and a prince so to be taken like in such a submissive humiliating way was a fate worse than death. It was another year before my maker explained to me fully what I was and why I came into being.

That is but one incident of his brutality, similar acts went on for the next 300 years of my existence until he finally released me.

Believe me when I say I understand what you are going through, I went through it myself. That is how I know that you are a strong and brave woman.  You will never forget about the abuse, but you will get over it eventually with time. It took me a long time to get over my own, but it has made me stronger because of it.” Eric finished, and my heart ached for him and the abuse he endured.

I didn’t know what to say to him after that. My abuse paled in comparison to what he endured. I just wanted to be close to him and comfort him.

“Eric, can I lay with you? I just, I just want to be close to you.” I said meekly. I needed the comfort as much as I wanted to give.

He lifted me out of the tub and dried me with a towel. He ran out of the bathroom for a split second, but came back with one of my satin nightgowns that he placed over my head. There were no words spoken between us, we didn’t need them.

He carried me into his daytime resting place and gently put me on his bed. He rushed to the opposite side of the bed and curled up behind my body holding me while gently brushing my wet hair back.

“Du är en stark modig kvinna. Skicka inte någonsin lämna mig” he whispered in my ear. I had no idea what he said, but it was soothing nonetheless.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: translation. You are a strong brave woman, please do not ever leave me.


	12. I'll Stand by You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EPOV

Waking up next to Sookie was akin to experiencing the highest level of Nirvana any being could ever attain. Having her next to me on her own volition only increased my elation. What Sookie didn’t know, though, was that she had completely spoiled me. This is how I wanted to wake every night for the rest of my existence.

I never realized how completely lonely I was until I experienced her company. The way her blond locks splayed across my pillow, the way her arms casually laid across her body barely touching mine, her eyes locked on my sleeping form. The culmination of her just brought me so much inner peace. 

Needing to get up, but definitely not wanting to, I gently stroked the few hairs from Sookie’s face.

“Dear one, we have much to accomplish tonight.” I whispered soothingly into her ear.

“Mmmm.” She replied in agreement. It was music to my ears to hear just how content she was simply by being with me. I could tell she was of the same mindset as I, if we didn’t have things to do, I believe she would gladly lay with me for a long time.

“I am going to make a few phone calls, then we can meet Callum at Fangtasia.” I listed off the tasks to Sookie. First things first, I needed to find Sookie a counselor of sorts. It was blatantly obvious to me that she could not handle the sex abuse on her own. She really did need some guidance on how to overcome the things that had happened to her.

Next task at hand was to meet with Callum. He had a lot of explaining to do, and I was not going to let him off the hook as easily as Sookie had. Granted, I never should have allowed her to go with him. A mistake I will not soon make again, but there is no way in hell that he can say that he was ignorant to her feelings as he was touching her body. Not to mention the fact that he had the fucking nerve to step into my establishment dripping in her scent. He was definitely going to answer to me, hell he would be lucky if I let him walk away alive.

I went to my office to contact Dr. Ludwig.

“What do you want vampire?” the endearing Dr. Ludwig spoke. If she wasn’t so damn useful, I would be tempted to end her.

“Good evening to you too. I have a request of you.” I demanded authoritatively.

“Go on.”

“I have recently acquired a new child. She is not technically of my blood, however she is mine. “ I started to explain the situation.

“Oh yes Sheriff, I heard. Miss Stackhouse is it?” She said. Sookie’s name was now infamous in the Supe community and she certainly was well known in the media as the woman who was turned against her will by an evil vampire.

“Yes. Sookie has experienced many cruelties in her short life, and as a result she is in need of a therapist to help her work out some issues.” I spoke candidly. I knew that, although annoying, Dr. Ludwig was discreet and well connected. If she could not help Sookie, she certainly knew of someone who could.

“You are referring to the sex abuse at the hands of her maker.” She elaborated.

“Yes. Although Sookie had not given me the full extent of his abuse, I did see a short video clip that gave me an idea of the things she has endured and to say he was a sadist would be giving him too much credit.” I concluded. I only saw about a minute of the video, but there were hours upon hours of tapes that I did not witness. The clip that I did see, however displayed Compton’s infatuation with sodomy. In fact he seemed to get off on using everyday household items to sodomize my Sookie with. The video I witnessed had him using a true blood bottle. Fucking sadist.

“This is not something I can help her with directly, but I will refer her to Dr. Lasko. Phoebe is an old friend of mine, who specializes in extreme cases of sexual abuse. She is a nymph, so I think she would be able to relate to Sookie fairly easily. I will contact her to set up an appointment with Sookie.” Said Dr. Ludwig. I knew that she would be able to find a suitable therapist for my Sookie.

“Thank you Dr. Ludwig.” I concluded and hung up the phone. Although I knew from experience that Sookie would not get past her trauma quickly, I was inordinately glad that we were at least moving in the right direction.

I went to go check on Sookie, to see if she was ready to leave, and to my surprise she was in the shower, my shower. It was a testament to my level control that I did not go in to the bathroom and watch, if not join her all together, but I knew, now more than ever, that she would appreciate the privacy. Although she did invite me into the bathroom last night so maybe… no, she definitely needs some privacy.

After a half hour, we were ready to head to the club. It was going to be another test of my control to not rip Callum’s head off. This was going to prove to be a delicate situation, as I didn’t want to upset Sookie, but I needed to make it abundantly clear to Callum that Sookie is not to be touched again. He had his chance with her and he did not prove himself worthy. He should be thankful that I even relented to Sookie’s request to stay with him in the first place.

Walking into the club, Sookie immediately went behind the bar and I went to my office. Pam walked in minutes later.

“Is our Irish friend here yet?” I asked of my dutiful child.

“No Eric, he is not. When he gets here I will send him back immediately…unless you want me to take him to the basement.” Pam would love nothing more than to torture that ingrate, but Callum was quite powerful in his own right so I wanted to handle the situation personally.

“No Pam, I will speak with Callum directly.” I ordered.

“Eric, if I may ask, what did he do to Sookie?” Pam asked. I knew she wasn’t just asking out of some inane need for gossip, Pam had grown quite fond of Sookie and was genuinely concerned for her.

“That is for Sookie to tell. I will say however, that Callum will not be getting any second chances with my Sookie.”

“ _Your_ Sookie huh?” Pam teased, I had slipped and used a little possessive pronoun, and of course my child would catch it.  I leered at her willing her to drop it which of course she did. She knew me too well to pursue that line of teasing.

“Very well Eric, I will send the bastard back when he arrives.” She emphasized the word bastard, and left my office.

After about an hour of dealing with my Sheriff duties which included resolving disputes over human companions, chattel property, approving business plans and residency requests, Pam came back to announce the Irishman’s presence. She also let me know that Sookie had run back to the storeroom as soon as she saw his arrival. I made a note to myself that Sookie was now employing avoidance tactics on the Irishman, certainly a good sign for me.

The arrogant bastard had the nerve to walk into my office without so much as a polite knock.

“Callum.”

“Eric.” And the standoff began. He was posturing, letting me know that he had no intention of backing away from his pursuit of Sookie. It was my duty as both her maker and friend, to let him know that I was completely and wholeheartedly in her corner.

“Sit.” I demanded, and he reluctantly surrendered, but not without giving me a thorough and hateful eye fuck.

“As you can imagine, Sookie was quite upset last night.” I wanted him to understand his complicity in her suffering. He tried to cut me off.

“Look Eric, I…” He started to explain himself, but I needed him to understand that I was in charge here not him.

“It is Sheriff to you, and you will not speak until I am finished.” I demanded angrily as I pounded my fist into my desk. I heard the wood crack slightly at my contact.

“As I was saying, Sookie was not in the appropriate mindset to engage in whatever sexual activity you thought to partake in. And I highly doubt that you were ignorant to her unspoken wish to cease whatever activity you were engaging her in. She has gone through numerous abuses in her short life, and you should have known better. It is for that reason that I cannot allow your training to continue. She needs to get mentally well before she can conceivably defend herself physically. I know you were planning on staying another week, but I think it is for the best that you leave tomorrow.” I finished sternly. This was not a request, and I would issue an edict if he refused to leave on his own accord.

“Sheriff, I understand I made a mistake with her, but I can assure you that my intentions are pure. I care for Sookie a great deal and I wish to pursue a relationship with her. She needs me.” He said arrogantly.

I wanted to rip his throat out for even suggesting that Sookie would be willing to be in a relationship with Callum.

“Sookie is my child! I will not have you hurt her any further, I will protect her with all that I am, and don’t think for one second that I will allow you in her life after the bullshit you pulled last night. Now, you have 24 hours to leave my area.” I seethed as I issued the order for him to leave.

“Sookie needs me, she does not have complete control over her powers.” He pathetically droned. I knew that it would take some time for Sookie to gain a full understanding of her powers, but at the moment she was not in the proper mindset to deal with that part of her being.

“No, she needs to heal first. Now leave.” I said as I flicked my wrist at him silently ordering him out of my office. He glared at me, stunned at my demands, but it did not affect me. My mind was made up, Callum had overstayed his welcome. In fact, I was going to have to sell the house that I allowed him to use.

Callum got up and left my office with his head hung in shame. The bastard should be ashamed of himself after what he did to my Sookie.

After Callum left, Dr. Ludwig called me back to let me know that Dr. Lasko was available to meet with Sookie tomorrow evening. I checked my email and not to my surprise I had about 100 emails waiting for me. Most of them were senseless requests ranging from donating to a cause I cared nothing for to fangbangers who had somehow gotten ahold of my email address.

I did however, have an interesting email from Compton’s ridiculous maker, Lorena Ball. I had never interacted with her directly, though I did know of her. She was infamous for her insanity, and brutality. She had actually been placed on trial once for slaughtering fifty humans in one night in Miami in the 1950s. She was convicted and sentenced to a year in a silver lined coffin.

Her email entailed some ridiculous monetary claim. She demanded reparations for Compton’s death and since I was the one who ultimately killed him, she was asking me to pay her $2.5 million dollars. That, in and of itself, was laughable, but that was not all the insane bitch wanted. She also demanded ownership of Compton’s database along with all of his other assets and investments.

I deleted the email frankly because the woman was insane, but also the council had been the one who issued Compton’s death sentence as well as the distribution of his estate. If she had any claim of dispute, she could take it either to the Queen or to the council.

I left my office to go check on the club, but it was more of an excuse to see Sookie. I found her behind the bar mixing up drinks like a world class mixologist. She had quite a following in her own right. She played up her innocence and as a result the men, both human and vampire, lined up at the bar to order drinks from her. It also made me glad to see that she didn’t give any of them the time of day.

I sat on my throne, but never took my eyes of her, she was an amazing beauty and I loved to watch her move. Her body flowed organically and rhythmically like ocean waves. Her smile alone could light the darkest of caverns, and I found myself mesmerized by her. A song came on KDED and I immediately thought of Sookie. 

“Sookie, would you honor me with a dance?” I asked her in my most charming tone. She smiled innocently at my request and took the hand that I offered.

We glided to the dance floor, as I held her close to me placing one arm around her tiny waist and the other snaked around her back with my hand resting on the base of her neck.  She wrapped her arms around comfortably around my waist. As we danced, I let the lyrics seep in. I wanted her to understand that the words spoken through the song were exactly what I was feeling for her. I wanted her to know that no matter what, I would always be there for her. Good, bad or indifferent, she could rely on me.

_  
[Music]  
When the night falls on you  
You don't know what to do  
Nothing you confess  
Could make me love you less  
  
I’ll stand by you  
I’ll stand by you  
Won’t let nobody hurt you  
I’ll stand by you  
  
So if you're mad get mad  
Don’t hold it all inside  
Come on and talk to me now  
Hey, what you got to hide  
I get angry too  
Well I’m a lot like you  
  
When you're standing at the crossroads   
And don't know which path to choose  
Let me come along  
Cause even if you're wrong  
  
I’ll stand by you  
I’ll stand by you  
Won’t let nobody hurt you  
I’ll stand by you  
Take me in into you darkest hour  
And I’ll never desert you  
I’ll stand by you  
  
And when, when the night falls on you, baby  
You feeling all alone  
You won't be on your own  
  
I’ll stand by you  
I’ll stand by you  
Won’t let nobody hurt you  
I’ll stand by you  
Take me in into you darkest hour  
And I’ll never desert you  
I’ll stand by you  
  
Oh I’ll stand by you  
I’ll stand by you_

_[End song]_

As the song concluded, I pressed a loving kiss on her forehead, letting her know that I meant every word of those lyrics. I may not have always done so in the past, but I was resolved to always be there for her.

Sookie and I remained embraced with one another even after the song concluded. She pulled away slightly so that she could look me directly in the eye.

I could see a thousand emotions cross her features, and I wondered what she was thinking.

“Eric…” She whispered as if she was going to say or ask something significant. She could ask anything of me and I would do it without hesitation.

“Yes Sookie?”  I replied eyeing her carefully, but still letting her know that she could tell me anything.

“Did you pick that song for a reason?” she asked intuitively. Her blue eyes boring deeply into mine as if she was hoping that my answer would be a resounding yes, which of course it was.

“That song was for you, my dear Sookie. I desperately need you to understand that I will always be there for you, if you’ll allow me of course.” I answered as I dipped my head down to her level giving her a chaste kiss on her cheek.

“Thank you Eric.” She said earnestly as she pulled out of my embrace. The loss of contact affected me more than I ever thought possible. I found myself wanting to be near her always.

I went back to my throne, but from that moment on, I knew my world would never be the same. I would always yearn for her, need for her. No one else would ever come close to the level of intimacy that she and I shared and that was without any sexual contact.

I called Sookie over to let her know about Dr. Lasko and her appointment for tomorrow evening. She seemed relieved, but also a little scared at the prospect of professional help, but I reminded her that I would be there for her if she needed me.


	13. Crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

I was incredibly nervous about meeting Dr. Lasko for many reasons. The first of which was because I was afraid she was going to say that I was broken beyond repair. For another thing I was terrified about having to recount my ordeals. She would think of me as someone who allowed all these bad things to happen to me. She would regard me as weak.

When she walked into the house, I was immediately taken aback at how young she was. She looked no more than 21 or so, my age. She was also incredibly beautiful. She had green eyes and dark brown hair; she was tall but yet dainty in a very feminine way. I envied her.

“Miss Stackhouse, I am Dr. Lasko, but please call me Phoebe.” She said in her very peppy sing song voice.

“Please call me Sookie. It is a pleasure to meet you.” I said nervously as I twiddled my fingers.

Eric had asked if I wanted him to stay, but I told him that I would feel more comfortable doing this alone. Seeing Dr. Lasko, I was glad I asked Eric to go. She seemed like someone he would go for.

“Alright, let’s get started.” She said as we both made ourselves comfortable in the living room.

“Sookie, tell me why you decided to call me?” Technically I didn’t call her, but I understood her question nonetheless.

“I’m just having a hard time dealing with some things that have happened to me.” I said shortly. I barely knew her and I didn’t feel entirely comfortable spilling all of my deep dark secrets to her.

“I can certainly understand that and I commend you for acknowledging that there are some things that you need help dealing with. You have already made the first step to healing yourself. Others in your position resort to violence, suicide or other self-destructive measures. “ She said professionally. It wasn’t as if I hadn’t thought of ending myself, in fact when my maker was alive I wanted to kill myself so badly and I probably would have if my plan didn’t work.

Also, it wasn’t as If I could become addicted to drugs being a vampire and all. What was my other option? Start killing people? That would only make me hate myself more.

“Yeah well, I can’t say I never thought of suicide.” I said full of shame.

“So let’s start at the beginning. The first step to healing is telling your story. So why don’t we start there if that’s okay with you.” She said. I was glad she wasn’t those types of psychiatrists that kept notes and wrote down everything I said. It was more like I was talking to a sister.

I didn’t know where to start, so I thought I would tell her about Uncle Bartlett and my childhood. I hadn’t even told Eric about this.

“Well. Alright my parents died when I was seven. They were caught in a flash flood and drowned. After that my brother and I were sent to live with my grandmother.” I paused to build up the courage to tell her about Bartlett, but she interrupted my musings.

“I see. That must have been traumatic for you at such a young age. How did you handle their death?” She asked.

“Well to be honest, I was so young, I don’t remember it all that well. I just remember my mother thinking that I was a freak of nature. I was closest to my father; he used to call me princess all the time and fawn over me. My mother resented me for that reason. So losing my father was really hard on me. He used to protect me from bullies.” I told her. I hadn’t thought of my parents in a long time. It’s sad to say, but I didn’t miss my mother, she treated me horribly, but my father’s death definitely affected me in more ways than I was willing to admit.

“So I imagine it must have been hard not having a father figure around.” She inquired.

“Yes, that was why, I guess, gran would invite my Uncle Bartlett over. You know, to have a strong male figure around for Jason and I.”

“So your Uncle Bartlett was a father figure to you?” she asked. I gulped audibly thinking how incredibly fucked up what I was about to say must sound to her.

“No, not at all. My Uncle Bartlett was a sick man. He..” I paused while I tried to get a grip on the lingering anger and resentment I had for him. “He used to molest me. When gran would invite him over to babysit Jason and I while she went to run errands, he would tell me to go put on a pretty Sunday dress then he would make me sit on his lap while he touched me and shoved his erection into my little frame.” I told her with shame in my eyes.

She just looked at me but she did not show any pity and for that I was thankful. I could see the wheels turning in her mind as she formulated a response to my revelation.

“And how long did this abuse last?” She asked. I could see the disgust she had for Bartlett.

“He would tell me that it was natural, and that I was being a good little girl, but I knew that what he was doing was not normal. It took me a year, until I found the courage to tell my grandmother about it.”

“None of that was your fault. You know that right Sookie?” she told me sternly, as if she was willing me to believe that.

“In a way, I knew that what he did was not my fault, but I also know that I should have said something to my grandmother the first time that it happened. I guess I just thought that he might be right because of all the bad things that had happened to my family.” I admitted. In my twisted mind, I thought that I had brought on the death of my parents and the abuse by my uncle on myself.

“You are only responsible for your own actions, and not those of the people around you. You can only react to thing happenings around you. What did your grandmother do to your uncle?” Dr. Lasko asked.

“She ordered him out of our lives under threat of death.” I said smiling at the memory of my strong willed and highly protective grandmother. She was the only one, other than my father, who loved me unconditionally despite my quirk.

“How has the abuse by your uncle impacted your subsequent sexual relationships?” she asked. Boy was that was a loaded question.

“I have never had a consensual sexual relationship with anyone.” I admitted sadly. That revelation in and of itself must make me the quintessential victim.

“I see.” She said as she herself gulped. I knew that she was thinking of her next question.

“Have you been sexually abused by others?” She asked carefully.

“I was made a vampire against my will.” I started, and I told her my story of how Bill had raped me, turned me and essentially made me his sex slave.

“Well Sookie, our time is over, but I would like to come back tomorrow night at the same time if that is alright with you.” She said.

“I would really like that.” I said, and that was the truth, she seemed to have an understanding of what I was going through and I really believed that she was the key to helping me.

We exchanged pleasantries and she left. I decided that it was still early enough in the evening that I should go make an appearance at Fangtasia.

I didn’t want to teleport there because I didn’t want to risk being caught and I didn’t know if Eric would have anyone in his office, so I grabbed the keys to Eric’s Escalade.

After meeting Dr. Lasko, I was eternally grateful to Eric that he had the foresight to seek that kind of guidance for me. I never would have done it for myself if he hadn’t done it for me.

I parked next to Eric’s Corvette and walked into the club. My senses immediately perked up and I sensed that there was something going on that I wasn’t aware of. Eric’s door was closed, but he was definitely in there. I put out my mental net to see if I could figure out who else was in his office. I caught the mental signature of a void, so I knew it was a vampire.

I walked into the main bar area to look for Pam. She was in her usual place, the door.

“Who is in Eric’s office?” I asked her hoping that she wasn’t going to say some sexy vampiress was in there banging Eric.

“A crazy bitch.” Pam responded as if it was nothing and she went back to checking the ID’s of the people in line.

What crazy bitch? I decided that if she was truly crazy, Eric wouldn’t be in there screwing her brains out, so I decided to relax a little. I laughed at myself a little thinking of how jealous I had gotten at the prospect of Eric being in his office with a woman with the door closed. We weren’t together, so I had no right to feel that way, but funny enough, I found myself feeling jealous more often than not. I made a note to talk to Dr. Lasko about that.

I went behind the bar and started filling the drink orders. Still, something about the vampire in his office felt oddly familiar to me. I made sure that I kept an eye on his office so that I could see who was there with Eric.

Twenty minutes or so passed, and then I heard the door open as _she_ strolled out of Eric’s office. I immediately became enraged and took a defensive stance.

She noticed me almost as soon as she walked out of his office. She looked at me with nothing but unadulterated hatred in her features. She had wanted me dead even when he was alive, so it stood to reason that now that I was responsible for his death, she was probably dead set on seeing me ended.

I focused on her as I she walked right up to me. I knew that she was going to try something I just didn’t know what level of crazy she was going to try to unleash. Eric was following her as if he had come to the same conclusion as I had.

“You fucking whore. You have everyone believing that you are some pathetic victim, when I know the truth. He did nothing to you that you didn’t want or ask for.” She spewed hatefully. My cold dead blood boiled at her accusations.

“Lorena, that is not true and you know it. I should have had you ended for the shit you did to me too!” I yelled back at her. I noticed Eric tense when I said that. He hadn’t known that she would sometimes partake in my abuse.

“Sookie, What did she do to you?” he demanded angrily.

I was exceedingly uncomfortable telling my secrets in a bar full of vampires and humans, all of which seemed to be focused on me.

“Not here.” I said and I walked back to Eric’s office. Pam, Eric and the bitch followed me. When we were all settled in his office and the door was closed. Eric looked at me expectantly waiting for my answer.

“She partook.” Was all I could manage to say.

“And you fucking loved it. You begged for more. You dirty little whore, you wanted everything you got.” Lorena continued to spread her disgusting lies.

“You think I wanted to be chained in silver as he fucked me with a fake silver cock! You think I liked hearing your fucking cackling ass. You are the one who told him to slice me up the way he did!” I felt naked admitting those tortures, and I hated myself for allowing her to bait me the way she did. I found my anger rising to the point that I couldn’t control it any more. I lunged at her grabbing her by the neck.

Pam immediately grabbed her to make sure that she couldn’t fight me off.

“Pam, take her to the basement. Chain her with silver.” Eric ordered.  Hearing his order, I released her neck, and Pam went to drag her to the basement.

“You’re dead whore!” She spewed one last threat before Pam had her completely out of the office.

As soon as she was gone, I fell to the ground, burying my head in my hands in both indignity and anger. Eric bent to lift my head to meet his. His cerulean eyes met mine and I knew he could read every emotion that I felt. He didn’t pity me though; he knew from experience that pity helped no one.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked, not in anger, but more in sadness that I was carrying that kind of weight all by myself.

“It’s not something to be proud of. I didn’t want you to know, I didn’t want you to look at me differently.” I said as I looked away from him, praying that he would not think any less of me.

He pulled me into his body as he cradled me, letting me feel whatever emotions I needed to feel. He was there to provide comfort, not judgment. I felt that wholeheartedly.

“It’s not true…what she said. I didn’t ask for any of that.”  I whispered as he continued to hold me close.

“I know.” He replied.

After a few minutes, I gathered myself off the ground. My sadness had turned to anger. I wanted to rip Lorena’s head off, I wanted her to feel as much pain as her and her child had made me feel.

Eric must have sensed my anger and need to vengeance.

“We can’t end her unless the Queen approves it, but we can punish her.” He said, mainly to himself, but just the thought of punishing her made me smile sardonically.

Eric took my hand and led me down to the basement, where Pam was already inflicting her own brand of torture on the bitch.

“How does it feel whore?” Pam asked rhetorically as she whipped Lorena with a silver chain. Lorena’s desperate cries made me smile. I took my torture a lot better than she was taking it now. Coward.

“This is for my sister!” Pam exclaimed and whipped her again. I swelled with pride in Pam’s actions and the fact that she was defending me so fiercely. I loved that she referred to me as her sister. In that moment, I truly felt as if the three of us were a real family. I hadn’t felt that way since gran died.

Lorena screamed and cried and made idol threats of revenge. Eric just looked on atmPam with pride as he rightfully should.

“Pam, please don’t kill our guest. At least not yet.” He smirked. “Have your fun, leave her chained until we can contact the Queen. Sookie and I are leaving; close up the bar when you are done.” Eric finished giving his instructions to Pam.

We ended up leaving the Escalade at Fangtasia and I went home in Eric’s Corvette.

“Was there anyone else involved in your torture?” Eric asked as we drove home. I understood what he really wanted to know. Was there anyone else who needed to die.

“No, not of their own volition anyway.”  I admitted cryptically.

“What do you mean?” He pressed me further.

I groaned at the memory of the humiliation I felt when Bill would order others to partake in his sick fantasies.

“He would glamour fangbangers to come to his house and have violent, angry, masochistic threesomes. Look Eric, any sick sexual fantasy you can think of, you can just assume that Bill thought of it too and made me perform it.” I admitted shamefully. And it was true, Bill had a very sick imagination and nothing and I truly mean nothing was sacred.

He gripped my hand a little tighter at my admission.

“It’s fine, Eric, I’m fine. Dr. Lasko is really helping me deal with these issues.” I said mainly because I didn’t want him to feel sorry for me.

“No one should have to go through that.” He said in a low menacing voice.

“I know, but it happened. I can’t change the past. I can only deal with the repercussions. “ I said thinking of what Dr. Lasko said to me earlier in the night.

“Very pragmatic of you.” Eric complimented. “You will be stronger as a result as I was.” He encouraged.

“I know Eric, but it’s a little deeper than that. It’s not just the aftermath of Bill that I am dealing with. Dr. Lasko made me realize that my past has affected me more than I ever realized.” I said feeling oddly comfortable talking about this with Eric.

“What do you mean?” Eric asked confused at my confession.

“I was repeatedly molested as a child. I realize that most all of my intimate experiences with men have resulted in rape or sexual abuse. I understand now that that was why I reacted to Callum the way that I did. I guess I just expected him to have his way with my body. I think, in a fucked up way, I just assume that of all men. That I have no say so, no control and that whatever a man wants from me, they will just take.”  I stated in a moment of mental clarity. Eric growled angrily at my confession, probably because I mentioned Callum.

“Is the monster who did that to you alive?” Eric demanded as he gripped the steering wheel. I thought he was going to break the damn thing.

“No, Bartlett is long dead.” I said remembering the joy and relief I felt the day Sid Matt came to the house to let gran and I know that he died of a heart attack.

“Good.” Eric said firmly. “An honorable man would never take a woman with their consent. A man who took a child was made to suffer for days before he was giving the reprieve of death.”

“Yes, well neither men had any honor.” I said quietly as we continued to drive home.

“Eric?” I said trying to think of how to frame my question.

“Yes, dear one?” He replied, and I loved that he called me that. It made me feel special and loved.

I smiled at his name for me as I said what was on my mind. “Would you like to go out with me?” I asked timidly.

“Sookie, are you asking me on a date?” he asked and the shocked expression on his face made me smile.

I laughed happily, “Yeah, I guess I am.” I had never been on a real date and I couldn’t think of a better first date than Eric.

He smiled, “Isn’t it tradition that the male asks the female to accompany them on a date?” It was funny to hear him ask about human customs.

“Yeah, but I didn’t think you would ever ask me on a date.” I replied. And I noticed him stealing curious glances my way as he continued to drive home.

“Hmm. Well, I would love you go on a date with you Sookie, I just never thought you would be agreeable to it. Will you allow me to plan the date?” He asked. I had to seriously contain my silly smile. I don’t think I could have been happier in that moment.

“Alright. I agree to that.” I answered giddy as a teenager on prom night.

“I will pick you up at the house tomorrow night after your session with Dr. Lasko.” He said and he picked up my hand and brought it to his lips kissing my hand lightly. I noticed his beautiful smile. His smile could light up a room, but being the stoic vampire that he was, he never smiled enough. It was all the more special that he reserved it for me.

When we got back to the house, we stayed up for a little while watching a movie and just talking about nothing and everything. His phone rang a few times. Pam had called letting us know that the bitch was resting manically in the basement.   What a fool she was coming to Fangtasia to demand reparations from Eric. She never did strike me as intelligent though.




It was no wonder why Bill was the way that he was. With a maker like Lorena, she was a case study for psychologists in the study of nature versus nurture.

To think I could have turned out that way had I not gotten away from Bill. I would have killed myself before I ever allowed myself to become a monster like them. I told Eric that too, and he became angry at the prospect of me ending myself. In a way I could see his point. Suicide was a coward’s way out, but in my case I thought of it more as an escape from a horrible fate rather than not being strong enough to overcome it.

A few minutes before dawn, Eric asked me if I wanted to join him in his chamber. I politely declined mainly because I wanted to do some reading and I didn’t want to be stuck down there all day. Eric looked disappointed, but he understood.

I spent the next 12 hours reading and surfing the internet. Being awake during the daylight hours with no place to go was starting to take a toll on me. I needed to find something to keep myself busy. I thought about my dreams of going to college. It would be perfect to be able to spend the daytime working towards a degree.

Of course, I wouldn’t be able to physically attend school, but I could take correspondence and online classes. I could pay for school all on my own thanks to the money I had been given from Bill’s estate.

I would speak to Eric tonight about that, hopefully he would be supportive of my dream. Something told me that he would be, without a doubt.

I decided to go shower and ready myself for the evening before Eric woke. I didn’t put on my date clothes, because I wanted it to be a surprise to Eric.

I had taken to online shopping and bought myself a really pretty deep purple mini dress with a low neckline. I had some silver pumps that I planned to wear with it. But for now I put on some yoga pants and a tank top.

I went downstairs, where I found Eric holding a bottle of Trublood for me, just like usual. He, however, was dressed for our date. He looked so handsome in his gray suit with a blue dress shirt.

My mouth dropped seeing his gorgeousness, and it was all for my benefit.

“Good evening Sookie.” He greeted and smirked knowing that I visibly attracted to him.

“Um, hi Eric.” I said trying to get a grip and stop ogling him.

“Dr. Lasko will be here shortly, so I will go to Fangtasia to get some work done, but I will be back in two hours to pick you up for our date.” He said emphasizing the word date. He looked happier than I had ever seen him, and I hope he could see the same in me.

Eric kissed my cheek lightly and flew to Fangtasia, I guess he was going to drive the Escalade home. I hoped he wouldn’t mess up his gorgeous hair, but something told me that even windblown, it would probably look gorgeous.

A few minutes later, Dr. Lasko knocked on the door. “Good evening Phoebe.” I greeted her politely.

“Evening Sookie.” She replied equally polite.

We settled ourselves in the living room and began our session. I found it hard to concentrate, though, I was too distracted thinking about my date tonight.

“You seem disinterested tonight Sookie, is there something wrong?” Phoebe asked. She was very perceptive; I guess that’s partly why she was such a good doctor.

“I’m sorry. I am just thinking about something else.” I admitted.

“Would you like to talk about it?” she asked. I thought about it for a few minutes, and I couldn’t see any harm in telling her about my date.

“Well, I have a date tonight…with Eric.” I said smiling at the thought of just him and me going out together. It was difficult to contain my excitement.

Phoebe, ever the insightful doctor, picked up on my glee.

“This is a good thing Sookie. You deserve happiness, and you trust Eric and know that he would not hurt you. “ She advised. I knew that I deserved to be happy and I knew that Eric cared a great deal about me, but along that same line of thinking, I worried that if things took a sexual tone, how would I react? I hoped to god that I didn’t react the same way I did with Callum.

“I know that, but I also worry that, if and when, we decide to take our relationship to the next level, you know sexually, I worry that I will react badly and push him away. I worry that I won’t be able to be in the moment and I’ll picture him as an abuser, like I did with Callum.” I admitted sadly. All of a sudden my anxiety level rose to the point that I almost decided to call Eric to cancel the date.

“Calm down Sookie. Overcoming the abuse will not be easy, it will take a lot of work on your part, but I guarantee you both you and Eric will not take it there unless you are ready. Take it slowly; just remember that it is Eric. You trust him; he would never do anything that would make you uncomfortable.” Phoebe said. It was true I trusted Eric more than anyone else in my life, but did I trust him utterly and completely? I relaxed a little at her words.  

“Tell me Sookie, how do you feel about Eric?” she inquired. That was a good question, one that I never allowed myself to dwell on too much.

“I admire him for his strength of character, I envy his ability to overcome his own experiences, I care about him a lot, I don’t want to see him get hurt. I get jealous of the women he has sex with, I feel safe with him, I can tell him anything and he won’t judge me. I don’t know if I could say that I loved him, because I don’t know what it is to love a someone who wasn’t a family member.” I explained my view honestly.

“I understand your point Sookie. It can be difficult to understand the concept of love, but I will say that what you just described sounds like a very healthy relationship to me. It’s normal to be jealous the way that you are, you desire him and to see others desiring him makes you feel possessive. He makes you feel safe, and I cannot tell you how valuable it is to have that feeling. If you can trust him with the things that you have told me, than I suspect that he is someone you need to keep near you.” Phoebe said. It almost sounded as though she was giving Eric her Dr. Lasko stamp of approval.

“Promise me Sookie, that when you are with Eric, you will focus on the present. Do not regress to thinking of the past and your abusers. You know in your heart that Eric would never harm you.” Phoebe said, and I agreed promising to live in the present sounded appealing to me.

“Good. Let’s meet again tomorrow, same time.” And with our next appointment set, we parted and I went upstairs to get ready for my date with Eric. 


	14. You Look Wonderful Tonight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

I heard the garage door open, and I knew that Eric was home. I hurriedly put my hair up in a side French bun, and I put a little flower clip in it. I put on some light make up and grabbed my clutch and made my way downstairs.

Eric was standing at the foot of the stairs watching me as I descended each step fully aware that he was watching me.

“You look…” his breath caught and he shook his head in slight awe. “so incredibly beautiful.” He finished as he picked up my hand and placed a soft kiss upon me.

I felt like Cinderella at the ball. I honestly had never felt as beautiful in my life. All I really wanted to do was kiss him in earnest, without abandon, without care, just kiss him, but I knew we had a whole night ahead of us.

He laced my arm in his and escorted me to the Escalade. I was thankful that he had decided on this car and not the Corvette. Not that I didn’t love the Corvette, but I didn’t want to flash anyone getting in and out of the car.

“So, where are we going?” I asked in my most cheerful voice.

He smiled and me, as if I he knew I was going to ask that. “It’s a surprise.” He said smiling wickedly.

We drove to an incredibly fancy restaurant, one that I would not have ever dreamed of going to in my human life. It was called ‘Brocato’s’ and it was situated at the top of the largest building in downtown Shreveport. You had to be a member of a very exclusive club in Shreveport to even be able to get a reservation at this restaurant. I wasn’t even aware that it was a vampire friendly establishment.

“Of course.” He said as he got out of the car, giving the keys to the valet, he came around and opened the door for me.

“But this is member’s only restaurant.” I said sounding like the country cousin.

He laughed at my statement. “Yes, I know I set it up that way, you know the more exclusive an establishment is the more alluring it is. Plus you can charge way more than necessary.” Eric explained. I was shocked.

“You own it?” I said questioningly.

“Among other ventures, yes I do.” He said. I was taken aback. I really needed to talk to him about all his business ventures. I wondered why he spent all his time at a dive like Fangtasia when he owned fancier places like this one.

“Ready to go in dear one?” he asked lacing his left hand in my right one. I nodded yes, and he led me to a set of elevators that took us to the top floor.

“Let me guess, you own the building too.” I said. It stood to reason that if he owned the top floor, he probably owned the rest of the building too.

“Of course. One of these days I will go over all of my holdings with you.” He said, and I felt honored that he would share that type of information with me.

The Maître d’ already knew who Eric was and greeted us appropriately. I was too busy looking around the restaurant. It was gorgeous and modern with a 360 degree view of the city including a beautiful view of the Red River. There was a dance floor in the center of the restaurant that I just knew we would be gracing later in the evening. The waiters wore black suits with white dress shirts. There were a few private booths that had curtains that could be closed for privacy which was where we were going.

The little room that we were seated in had a large window view of the city, but the rest of the room was completely private. It wasn’t a large room, maybe enough to hold four or five people, but it was private and I loved it.

I noticed that we were moving, so my view of the city was constantly changing.

“The top floor rotates, so you can see the entire 360 degree view of the city.” Eric explained. I was still in shock that Eric actually owned this place.

I was too busy staring out of the window and I rudely was not paying as much attention to my date as I should have been.

I heard Eric laughing lightly and I looked over at him. “Maybe I should have picked a different restaurant. It doesn’t look like my beautiful date cares much for my presence.” He joked.

I was mortified by my behavior. “I’m sorry, it’s just so pretty. “ I said apologizing for my rudeness.

“Yes it is.” He said staring me in the eyes, and I knew he wasn’t talking about the 360 degree view of the city.

“I would have loved to bring you here as a human, I understand the food is very good.” Eric said. I had heard of Brocato’s and from what I understood the food was to die for.

“I’m sure that I would have loved to come here with you as a human too, but you’re stuck with vampire Sookie.” I retorted jokingly, to which he responded with his award winning smile.

We both became silent after that, but it wasn’t awkward. We were both looking at each other and he picked up my hand and began to rub small circles in my palm with his thumb. It was relaxing and we were enjoying each other’s company. The great thing about Eric is that we can read each other so well, that often times there are just no need for words between us.

The waiter came back to the table and brought with him two champagne glasses filled with Blood. I wasn’t even aware that we had ordered anything yet.

Eric took one of the glasses and raised it for a toast. I took his cue and picked mine up as well to meet his glass.

“A toast to you, Sookie, you have changed me in ways that I never imagined possible.” He said reverently and clinked his glass to mine, but also placing a chaste kiss on my cheek. I was taken aback at his declaration that I had changed him so I decided to ask him.

“How have I changed you?” I asked in sort of a teasing way so as not to make the atmosphere to heavy.

He eyed me carefully, making sure to choose his words so that he did not give too much of himself away. I knew him better than that though, I could see right through him.

“I find that I am…protective of you.” He said carefully yet somehow his words seemed to imply much more than that. I pressed him on in an attempt to get him to admit what I had already suspected.

“You are protective of Pam, how am I any different?” I was careful not to go too far in my questioning; after all this was supposed to be a lighthearted date.

“Sookie.” He said silently asking me to let it go, but I stubbornly couldn’t.

“Please Eric, just pacify me a little. How am I different than Pam?”  I was almost begging, but I really wanted to know. I think I just needed to have a reassurance that how I felt for him wasn’t one sided.

In response, Eric made sort of a humph sound, like he really didn’t want to admit his feelings for me.

“Let’s Dance Sookie.” He said instead, changing the subject.  The band was playing Bonnie Raitt’s “I Can’t Make You Love Me.” Which I thought was perfect, at least for me. His careful skirting of my question made me feel sort of defeated. I wanted him to admit to having feelings for me, but instead he left me feeling as if he didn’t.

He took my hand and led me to the dance floor, but I just wasn’t into it. He picked up on my reluctance and general sour mood.

“Please Sookie, just trust me.” He whispered in my ear. I wasn’t sure what I was trusting him with. I trusted him with my life already, but with my heart? I didn’t know if I could do that just yet.

We began dancing. He was a very good dancer, the way he held me as he led me across the dance floor; it was almost as if we were floating. I tried to put my heart into the dance, but I couldn’t. I was too preoccupied with his response to my earlier question.

“You don’t trust me.” He whispered as we danced, and it wasn’t a question.

“I trust you enough.” I replied honestly.

“But not wholeheartedly.” Said Eric disappointed by my thwarting admission.

“No, not wholeheartedly.” I admitted sadly. “But I want to.” Trying to mollify him, when really it was me who needed the reassurance.

“What is holding you back?” He asked as he dipped me.

“You.” I retorted shortly.

“What does that mean?” He asked spinning me around his body.

“It means that I have to guard my heart.” I said as he brought me back closer to his body.

“Not from me.” He whispered in my ear. His words made me melt, but at the same time I needed for him to tell me outright that he had feelings for me, not some vague implication that he did.

“Then tell me Eric.” I whispered in exasperation. I wanted to confess my feelings, but I just desperately needed him to do so first, silly as it sounds, but the truth was that I just couldn’t take it if I put myself out there only to be rejected.

Eric didn’t answer; instead we danced in silence until the song finished. I knew that I couldn’t make him love me, like the song says, but I just wanted some honesty. If he couldn’t ever see himself loving me, then he just needed to tell me. Rip off the band aid, so to speak.

I guess it was then that I decided that I would lay down my heart on the off chance that he was waiting for me to admit my feelings. The risk was great, for me at least, but going on the theory of risk versus reward, I decided that it was worth it.

Then the realization hit me. The conversation that Eric and I had in the car ride home from Fangtasia last night. I told him that I had never felt like I had any control over my relationships with men. Maybe, just maybe he took what I said to heart and was waiting for me to make the move. Maybe he wanted me to control how our relationship progressed and he wasn’t going to make any admissions unless he was certain that I was open to them and that his advances were wanted.  

We sat back down at the table, and I didn’t look at him, instead I focused on the surrounding views of the city. What I was really doing was building the courage to say what I needed to say.

I could feel him looking at me, and from my periphery I knew that he could see my inner turmoil. I took an unnecessary breath and turned to him.

“You and Pam are my family now, but the feelings I have for you are…somewhat overwhelming to me.” I admitted, looking him deeply into his beautiful blue eyes.  He didn’t respond so I continued. “I need you in my life, and I don’t want to screw anything up again.” I said thinking of the poor decisions I had made in not telling Eric the entire truth about Callum and Sam.

Eric picked up my hand and squeezed acknowledging my words as the truth. I had more to get off my chest, and I knew that it was now or never.

“I know that I have a long way to go, but Dr. Lasko is helping me. I realize that I may never know the true definition of love, but when I’m with you I feel something deep, significant, like nothing I’ve ever felt in my life. I get insanely jealous when I see women around you. I want you to be mine and only mine.” I confessed feeling completely vulnerable.

“Sookie, I want to tell you so many things. I want to be able to confess my feelings for you like you have done, but I can’t” Eric said, and it broke my heart. He didn’t feel the same way about me that I felt about him. All of my fears surfaced and I wanted nothing more than to get out of there.

I reached for my clutch and got up to leave. I couldn’t be near him, I couldn’t let him see how upset I was. I had taken a big risk and put myself out there on the off chance that he wanted me to confess first, but I had grossly overestimated his feelings for me.

Before I could walk out of the room, Eric grabbed my wrists.

“Sookie, please you misunderstand me.” He pleaded. I didn’t think there was any other way to interpret what he had said.

“Please Eric, just let me go.” I begged, and I meant that in more ways than one. I wanted to leave the restaurant, but also, if he didn’t feel the way I did, there was no way that I could continue to live with him. It would just hurt too much, not to mention seeing him with a different woman every night. It would just kill me. 

“Never. Please let me explain.” He said, and I deflated sitting back down in the chair next to him.

I didn’t look at him, I couldn’t really, and it was killing me. I regretted putting my feelings out there only to be rejected.

“Sookie, you have to understand that I have to protect you, sometimes that means protecting you from yourself, sometimes that means protecting you from me.” He started to explain. It made no sense to me.  I didn’t understand his logic.

“You have just gone through a traumatic ordeal and as much as I want you, as much as I selfishly need you. I also need you to be well first. Your wellbeing is my priority and I don’t want to compromise any progress you have made with Dr. Lasko because I selfishly want to have you as mine.” He explained.

Now I understood. He was worried that I would react to him the same way that I had with Callum. He worried that if that happened, that I would not want him anymore that I would see him as an abuser. It made perfect sense, but at the same time I knew that he meant more to me than Callum ever did. I knew how to separate the feelings of abuse and the feelings of safety and care that Eric provided. I just needed to make him understand that I was not going to flake on him.

“I know that I have a long way to go, but believe me when I say that the feelings I have for you will prevent me from reacting to you the same way I did with Callum.” I explained. I needed him to understand that I was not as fragile as he thought I was. Yes, it would take time and concentration on my part, but I knew that I could overcome my past.

“I want to believe that, truly I do, but it’s a risk I am not willing to take. We have forever Sookie, there is no reason to rush into something that you are not ready for.” He made a lot of sense, but at the same time we were vampires, and I just didn’t want him to have sex with others while he waited on me to get over my past.

“I appreciate your concern for me, I really do. No one has cared about me like that in a long time, but at the same time, I can’t sit around anymore and watch you screw fangbangers . I know I am a vampire and I am supposed to get beyond my human sensibilities, but I can’t, not in this instance. I need you Eric, I want you.” I realized that I sounded almost desperate, but I didn’t care. He had feelings for me and he was not telling me because he was trying to spare me somehow.

“Alright Sookie, let’s just take it slow. I will not do anything that you don’t want me to do.” He conceded.

“Eric, it’s not like you have to walk on eggshells around me, you don’t seem to understand that you are different, I don’t see you like I see anyone else. I promise you that I will not break down on you, please don’t underestimate me.” I pleaded, I didn’t want him to think of me as someone who was constantly on the brink of a mental breakdown.

“I know, but you can appreciate why I want to be careful with you.” He said and I started to get angry, I didn’t understand or appreciate why he felt the need to be careful with me.

“No, I can’t appreciate it!” I said raising my voice slightly. I was becoming exasperated with this conversation. So much for my nice innocent date.

“Dammit Sookie! Can’t you understand that I become irrational around you? I let my emotions get the best of me when it comes to you. I physically hurt you in the past. All I’m trying to do is be careful not to allow something like that happen again.“ He exclaimed.  I knew this was all about his guilt, but I also needed him to know there was nothing to be guilty about.

“We already talked about this Eric. Clean slate remember? The past is the past, we both made mistakes, we both got over it. Forgive and forget. There is no need to for you to feel like you can’t do or say things around me out of fear that I won’t be able to handle them.” I said. This conversation was becoming way too intense and obviously words weren’t helping.

“Sookie, I am just being care…” He started to say, but I cut him off, leaning over to him and kissing him for all I was worth. I know I took him off guard by my actions, but I needed him to know that I was capable of intimacy with him.

I maneuvered myself so that I was now sitting on his lap with my arms wrapped around his neck. I parted my lips nudging them in between his. He was reluctant at first, but he gave in allowing entrance into his mouth. There was no doubt that I was dominating this kiss, massaging my tongue against his. My fangs ran out causing me to pull back a little, but as soon as I tried, he wrapped his arms tightly around my waist pulling me back into him. He pierced his tongue against my fangs causing his blood to pool in my mouth. He tasted sweet to me and it reminded me of red licorice I used to eat as a child.

I pierced my tongue allowing my blood to pool into his mouth as well. He groaned at the taste of my blood. Our kiss was full of passion and emotion and I ran my hands through his hair, pulling at it in a passion filled movement that meant to display my primal need for him.

Being that we were still at the restaurant, and I was afraid that we might give in to our baser instincts right then and there, I reluctantly pulled away from him.

“Sookie.” He groaned breathlessly. “Let’s get the fuck out of here.” He said smirking at me, I smirked right back at him. I’d have to remember that tactic for the future. Anytime the conversation becomes too heavy just go in for the kill.

As we drove back to the house, I watched as he drove. His hard muscles moving organically under his suit. The way his jaw clenched as the sexual tension in the car rose to an all-time high. I couldn’t contain the pooling wetness between my legs. My arousal permeated the cabin of the car.

Eric most definitely took notice, sniffing the air inhaling deeply. He looked over at me hungrily. I looked over at him, not embarrassed by my reaction to him. He put his hand on my upper thigh, but didn’t travel any further than that. I, however, wasn’t quite as self-controlled as he was. I reached across the center console and began to rub his building erection.

“So impatient lover.” He groaned in pleasure. I didn’t care, I wanted to feel him, so I continued to stroke him through his suit pants, and there was a lot to stroke believe me.

When Eric pulled into the garage, I pushed myself on top of his body, straddling him in the driver’s seat and began kissing him roughly conveying the passion I held for him and him only.

He returned the passion and then some. Before I knew what had happened he had us out of the car and we were somehow in his bedroom.

I wasn’t exactly sure where this was going, but I just decided to let things happen naturally. I was still straddling him as he sat on the edge of his bed.  He pulled my dress off over my head and continued to kiss me. Our hands were all over each other’s body. He unclasped my bra and I was left straddling him with only a thin silk layer of material separating him from my naked body.

Eric, ever the breast man, spent several minutes working my nipples. Sucking, pinching biting. Each movement luscious and highly arousing. I ripped his suit jacket off then his dress shirt. I probably ruined hundreds of dollars in clothing, but I didn’t give a damn and I had a feeling he didn’t either.

I ran my fangs down his chest drawing a thin layer of blood all the way down marking my territory. I pulled away from him so that I could remove his belt and pants. He was letting me have control and let me do whatever I wanted to do. After I had his pants off, he was going commando, Eric ripped off my panties and turned my body so that I wasn’t facing him. He sat me down in between his legs on the bed. His erection was pushing into my lower back. He ran one of his hands up the side of my breast and his other hand began exploring my wet center.

He massaged two fingers into me curling his fingers deeply inside me causing me to moan at his expert touch. He pulled his fingers out of me causing me to gasp at the loss of contact. He grabbed my hand and entwined my fingers in his. He thrust our combined fingers into my throbbing sex. His fingers guided mine into my own body. The feeling of getting myself off steered by him was highly erotic.

“Do you feel how hot you are?” He said in between nips on my neck. “Do you feel how wet you are?” He whispered as I moaned in response leaning my body back into his. I threw my head back so that it was resting on his chest.

 “All for you.” I moaned passionately.

Eric pulled my head around so that our lips met. He kissed me with reckless abandon. It was incredibly hot to have his tongue down my throat while we both massaged my wet center all the while his free hand kneaded my breast.

I found myself thrusting my hips into our combined fingers, and I knew that I was close; I could feel the tightening and tingling in my lower body.

“Oh god Eric!” I cried out. “You are mine!” I screamed as I came on our entwined fingers.

Eric turned me around so that I was facing him; he pulled me back so that we were lying face to face on his bed.  We laid there in each other’s arms, and I realized how selfish of a lover I was being. I pushed him flat on the bed and arranged myself so that I was straddling him.

I started kissing his chest trailing from his nipples down to belly button. My hands massaged his body as I moved down further to his thighs.

I began to massage his erection, causing him to growl excitedly at my touch. I made sensual strokes preparing him for my mouth. I lowered my mouth onto his erection; he was so large that I couldn’t take him completely, so I stroked what I couldn’t fit. Swirling, sucking, biting, I put everything I had into giving him pleasure. I stayed in the moment, glancing up to see his eyes. He was moaning my name as if it were his mantra.

“Sookie, Oh fuck Sookie, So fucking hot. Mmmm. Gods” He moaned repeatedly. The profanity made it all that much more hot and sexy.

I pulled my mouth away from him and bit into his thigh, taking his blood. “Fuck me Sookie, I’m almost there.” He screamed, so I put my mouth back on his pulsating erection. A few more laps on his bulging manhood and he came in my mouth. I took everything he had to offer.

“You are mine Sookie! Always!” He yelled out as I finished imbibing him. I looked up at him and smiled jubilantly. It was just him and I in that moment, no one else existed. Eric pulled me up to him and hugged me to his body tightly.

“Gods Sookie, the things you do to me.” He whispered seductively in my ear as I laid flush against his chest.

“Mmmm. You are mine, only mine. No more fangbangers.” I said quietly but still demandingly.

He laughed at my dominant declaration. “As you are mine, my Sookie.” He retorted. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	15. Valhalla

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EPOV

Waking up in the arms of my fairy vampire lover after last night  made me feel like I was walking the halls of Valhalla. She had fallen into an unnecessary slumber, and she looked absolutely beautiful. Her features were filled with peace and serenity. Her angelic lips quirked into a slight smile reflecting her content and I desired nothing more than to see her like this all the time.

Her life thus far had not been filled with many happy moments, and all I wanted to do was change that. I wasn’t lying last night when I told her that she was mine forever. I wanted to bond with her, I wanted to pledge to her, I just wanted to be as connected as two vampires could be and for as long as possible.

I also wanted to give her something that I know she longed for since before being turned. She may not have noticed, but I saw the pamphlets that she had downloaded. I knew she had aspirations of getting a formal education and I thoroughly admired her for it. It would also give her purpose and personal fulfillment not to mention giving her something to do during the daylight hours. Although she didn’t need my money to help her, I wanted to encourage her to pursue her dreams.

Sookie valued her humanity and although that could be quite dangerous for a vampire, for her, she seemed to be able to find the delicate balance. A vampire with high morals, I had to stifle a laugh at the concept. That was not me nor was it my progeny, rather it was distinctly her. She was my other half, the light to my dark, and in so many ways she completed me in ways that I didn’t know were missing.

I noticed her stirring, and I just looked on as if entranced by her slight movements. The way her hand unconsciously reached out for me as if I were her life line, and I relished the thought of being her lifeline, I wanted to be that for her as she was that for me.

“Mmmm. Eric.” She whispered as she nuzzled her body under my arm and draped her arm across my chest holding me tightly.

“Sweet Sookie, wake up darling.” I said pleasantly as I caressed her beautiful blonde tresses and placed butterfly kisses on her forehead. I wanted this moment to last for all eternity.

She sat up suddenly and gasped breaking away from the serene moment that we had created.

“What’s the matter?” I asked panicked. 

“Jesus Eric, I slept!” She exclaimed. I laughed haughtily. Only Sookie would be alarmed about finding herself at peace.

She leered at me, presumably angry that I had laughed at her expense.

“What is so bad about sleeping in my arms?” I asked feigning hurt in an overly dramatic way.

She responded to my mocking by slapping my chest. “It’s not funny. I’ve never slept that long since…” She said trailing off as she obviously didn’t want to mention that she hadn’t slept that long since her bastard maker was killed.

I pulled her into my body in an effort to comfort and reassure her that she was safe and that there was nothing to be worried about.

“It’s perfectly natural to let yourself relax enough to fall into a slumber. There is absolutely nothing to be worried about. You are always safe here with me.” I said lovingly as I caressed her arms in a soothing way.

“God. You’re right. What is wrong with me that I would react that way?” she said contemplatively.

“There is nothing wrong with you, you’ve never really been able to let your guard down long enough to relax, so it just feels a little foreign to you, that’s all.” I said calmly, the poor girl probably hasn’t rested peacefully since her grandmother died.

She relaxed at my words, knowing that they were true. “Who needs Dr. Lasko when I have Dr. Northman.” She teased sarcastically. What she didn’t know was that I actually did have a master’s degree in psychology, which reminded me that I wanted to talk to her about her own education.

“Lover, there was something that I wanted to ask you.” I started and she looked at me with one eyebrow cocked knowing that I had something up my sleeve.

“Oh yeah? And what is that.” She said curiously.

“I noticed that you had printed some pamphlets from the University. Was that something that you were interested in?” I asked and before I even finished my sentence I noticed her face light up, then bizarrely she saddened. Such a curious creature

“Before gran died.” She began. She slumped in agony at the thought of her grandmother’s passing. “I had a plan you see.” She said but started to choke up. I held her close and caressed her letting her know that I was not going anywhere.

“What was your plan lover?” I asked, kissing her forehead.

She took an unnecessary breath and finished her story. “I was saving up to go to college. I worked doubles for nearly a year, saving every last penny I had. Even after gran died, paying all the bills on my own, I still managed to save up. I was only about $2000 and a month or so away from saving enough for school. I was planning to turn in my notice to Sam. I was so excited.” She said sadly and I knew what she was going to say next and it pissed me off.

“Before I could save enough and go off to college, Bill took that all away from me.” She finished, I wanted to bring him back from the dead just to turn around and kill him again.

I pictured human Sookie walking around the campus, studying in the library, going from class to class under the warm sun. That was what she was meant to do, but Compton took that from her, along with all her other dreams like being a mother and a grandmother.

It was a good thing that I had his bitch maker in my basement to vent my aggressions against. She would pay for the sins of her progeny, and I would ensure that this happened tonight.

“I know it’s not the same, and I know it doesn’t  change what’s been so wrongly taken from you, but I would very much like for you to continue the dream you have of getting an education.” I said trying to rein in my colossal anger for Bill.

Sookie turned and straddled my body, kissing me passionately, grateful that I was agreeing to allow her to pursue her dreams.

“You don’t know what that means to me.” She whispered against my lips. I held her for a few more moments before pulling away.

“There are some precautions we must take, however.” I said. And by precautions I meant rules, but I didn’t want her to think I was restricting her dreams in any way.

She looked at me as though she could see straight through my bullshit terminology, she knew me too well.

“I know Eric, I can’t leave the house during the day.” She huffed in annoyance.

“Yes, my lover. I know that LSU has great online and telecourses that you can enroll in. And after a few years, you can take some night courses.” I said smiling at her annoyance. 

She smiled at me and kissed me deeply. If I knew that this was all it took to make her happy, I would have suggested it sooner.

“We must get ready to go to the bar.” I said regretfully. If I could spend forever in bed with her, I would resign as Sheriff in a heartbeat.

“You take the shower, I must make some phone calls.” I said. I could see her disappointment that I was not going to be joining her and to be honest it was a gratifying feeling, knowing that she wanted me. There were two reasons I didn’t join her however. For one thing, I wanted out intimacy to be completely controlled by her. She needed to feel in control of her own sexual experiences, and we hadn’t had intercourse yet, so when the time was right for that to happen, I wanted it to be because she wanted it to happen and she was in control.

For another reason, I needed to call the Queen about my request to end Lorena. Honestly though, it was a formality to get her approval, Lorena would meet her end tonight whether the Queen approved or not.

“Your Majesty.” I said feigning respect.

“Ah my darling Sheriff, to what do I owe the honor?” she said in her pitchy childlike voice.

“I have taken Bill Compton’s maker into custody. I am petitioning to you to allow me to see to her final death.” I said sternly in my demanding Sheriff tone.

“Ah I see. And what crime has she committed?” She asked completely disinterred whatsoever.

“She is guilty of torturing my progeny.” I said shortly. With the Queen, I have found that it’s best to stick to brevity.

“Pamela?” she asked incredulously.

“No. Sookie.” I replied quickly.

“Oh Northman, you are taking this maker by proxy task very seriously aren’t you?” she said chuckling at herself. She can be such a ridiculous child sometimes.

“That is what you tasked me to do, and I take my duties seriously, yes. “ I said trying to tamper my building anger at idiocy.

“Do with her what you like. Her maker met his final death centuries ago, so the monetary reparations won’t be a problem. Just make sure to file the report by the end of the month.” She said.

“Thank you, your majesty.” I said and hung up the phone. I could feel the bloodlust building, the anticipation of exacting retribution on Sookie’s behalf nearly made me hard.

As I went back into the room, I noticed that Sookie had finished her shower and was standing in the bathroom wearing only a towel. She was definitely trying my resolve to not initiate sex with her.

She smiled seductively at me and I proceeded to disrobe in front of her. Just because I wasn’t initiating didn’t mean I wasn’t enticing. She leered at me for a few moments, and I smirked at her blatant ogling of my body.

He left the bathroom, presumably to go to her room to find some club wear. I showered alone. Hopefully that would change soon, since I swore off fangbangers last night, I did have needs and I only wanted Sookie to satisfy those needs, as much as I wanted to be the only one to satiate her needs as well.

Thirty minutes and one sexual tension filled car ride, we found ourselves at the bar. I needed to talk to Sookie about Lorena.

“Dearest, we need to discuss tonight’s events.” I said and just as I was starting to tell her about Lorena’s doom, Pam came in the office.

“Eric, Sookie.” She said nodding to both of us.

“How is our prisoner tonight?” I asked Pam.

“Miserable.” She said smiling mischievously. I knew that Pam had already started in on Lorena tonight. I know I turned her for a reason, she made me so proud.

Sookie seemed uncomfortable at the mention of Lorena, but I needed for Sookie to be strong. I needed her to face her fears and take back the control that Lorena and Bill had taken from her. I knew that she could do it, I saw the fire in her eyes the night of Compton’s trial.

“I have gotten approval from the Queen. Lorena will meet the true death tonight.” I said letting that knowledge sink in to Sookie’s mind for a second.

 Initially, I had wanted to end Lorena, but it occurred to me on the ride to the bar, that Sookie should be the one to do it. It was both poetic and also cathartic for her to be the one to end her tormentor.

“Sookie, I am offering for you to be the one to end her.” I said austerely. I didn’t want to force her into it, but I also wanted her to embrace her vampire nature, or at least come to terms with the fact that vampires view justice in a much different way than humans.

“I want to do it.” She said staring at me as if to convey her need to show her inner strength. I knew that she didn’t really _want_ to do it; rather she was more resigned to show Lorena that she was the better vampire.

I grinned proudly at her, she was not afraid to take on her oppressors, she was strong all on her own, without Pam and I supporting her, which of course we would do anyway whether she needed us or not.

“Pam and I will be there, but this is your fight. You need to take back the control that those monsters took from you.” I said encouraging her like a coach would his team before a big game.

She nodded in agreement and walked out of the office, making her way to the basement. Pam and I followed her.

Lorena’s head boosted up immediately as soon as Sookie opened the door. It didn’t take her long before her insults came flying. Nothing I hadn’t heard her say before, none of it true either.

“You’re nothing! You hide behind Northman! You’re pathetic!” Lorena yelled desperately throwing out insults in a last ditch effort to wound Sookie. Lorena knew her number was up, and this was just her weak attempt to inflict doubt in Sookie’s mind. Sookie was stronger and smarter than that though; she would not let Lorena be the cause of anymore of her strife.

Unexpectedly, Sookie reared back and punched Lorena in the cheek. I could hear bones breaking. Sookie left a large indention in the side of Lorena’s face.

Lorena spit out some blood, and continued her insults. “Unchain me bitch! Fight me fairly, or are you so weak and pathetic that you hide behind silver chains?” Lorena taunted. Sookie looked at her with nothing but murder in her eyes.

“She’s right, unchain her.” Sookie demanded calmly and cooly. It was almost frightening to see her so composed yet so dangerous.

“Sookie, that’s not a…” I started to say that it wasn’t a good idea, but Sookie cut me off yelling. “I SAID UNCHAIN HER!” 

I nodded to Pam to go and unchain her. Pam understood, she knew to stay close to Lorena in case Sookie was overpowered. Lorena was around 300, roughly the same age as Pam. Pam, however was taught how to fight by me personally, so obviously she was superior to Lorena.

As soon as Pam unchained Lorena, she lunged at Sookie, but Sookie darted away kicking Lorena to the ground. I watched on proudly as I knew I was not needed in this fight.

Sookie, did not taunt Lorena though. I had taught her to keep your ego in check during a fight. The minute you tout superiority or mocking is the minute you lose the battle.

Sookie stayed calm and focused and she picked up Lorena by the neck and threw her against the wall. Granted, Lorena was weak from the silver and lack of blood, but she should still be more formidable than this.

Lorena picked herself up off the floor again, this time she had a more determined look in her eyes. I noticed her eyeing one of my swords that I had mounted on the wall, but before she could take off after it, Sookie had beaten her to it.

Sookie grabbed the sword and swung it valiantly like a warrior princess effectively decapitating Lorena. Pam looked shocked, as if I would allow any child of mine to walk this earth without knowing how to wield a sword properly.

These two beauties had made me the proudest maker. Their beauty was only rivaled by their strength, and Sookie in particular had made me feel honored to be her maker. She was well on her way to overcoming her past, and I knew it was only a matter of time before I would be the beneficiary of all the strides she was making in herself.

Sookie dropped the sword and ran towards me wrapping her arms and legs around my body, needing to be touched and comforted. I could feel her bloodlust rising, and I didn’t want our first time to be a result of the bloodlust she was feeling for killing Lorena.

I kissed her deeply, but I restrained myself in fear that if it went farther, she would feel regretful that it happened under such circumstances. I disentangled our bodies and Sookie sighed in disappointment.

“Come dear, let’s get you some blood. “ I said and led us out to the bar to get Sookie some Trublood. That shit tasted vile enough that it would surely calm the bloodlust she was feeling.

The rest of the evening went on as any other night did, but I knew that this was a turning point for Sookie. She was starting to embrace her vampire nature and also coming to terms with the horrible things that had happened to her in the past.

We left the club that night, both feeling as if a weight was lifted off our shoulders and we could go back to the comfort of our bed and the serenity or each other’s company. 


	16. Alive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

This morning I found myself feeling…alive, truly alive for the first time since, well ever really. I felt liberated, empowered and resolute. My past is my past, it will never change, but having taken my revenge on those that have wronged me, I feel as though I am ready to start a new phase in my life.

I woke up and enrolled for the Fall Semester as LSU. I signed up for all my core classes, English, Algebra, Chemistry, and Spanish. I didn’t declare a major, mainly because I’m not certain yet what I want it to be.

I also had an appointment with Dr. Lasko. I talked to her about the date Eric and I had, and the battle with Lorena. Dr. Lasko told me that she was proud of me for controlling the things that were happening around me. She said that when I felt ready to take the next step with Eric, that I would be able to handle it. She gave me a few pointers on how to stay in the moment with him and not regress to the abusive situations of my past.

Thinking about taking the next step with Eric made me giddy. I wanted it, I was ready, I had claimed him as he claimed me and I wanted our physical relationship to catch up with our emotional one. I am a vampire after all, and it is really tiring to suppress my inherent vampiric needs, which I have been doing for far far too long.

I had a plan though, tonight I planned on seducing my Viking. I had ordered this hot little dress a couple of weeks ago, hoping to, one day, have the courage to wear it. The dress is black leather with a sweetheart neckline and it’s super short. When I say short, I mean slutty short. I figured I could wear it Fangtasia, but it would also drive Eric wild too.

In my human life, I never would have even thought of wearing this dress, in fact I probably would have scoffed or even been embarrassed to try it on, but it’s a new me.

Seducing Eric would be easy, we both want it, he’s just been patient enough to wait for me to be ready. The truth is I am completely ready, but I also crave to be closer to him, more than just physically. In some ways, I wished that he really was my maker by blood, but in other ways I’m glad that he isn’t.

If he was my true maker, he would have complete and utter control over me, not that I think he would ever abuse that power, but still I wouldn’t feel like his equal.

Having said that, I find myself slightly jealous of the fact that Pam has a direct line to his emotions and feelings and I don’t. Altough I know it silly to be jealous of Pam, I just want to be a part of him physically, mentally and emotionally and vice versa.

Eric would be up in a couple of hours, so I decided to start making myself look irresistible. Hair curled, make-up on, and dress on. I couldn’t wear a bra with the dress and I decided on a really skimpy thong. Tonight, I decided, I was going all in, putting all the cards on the table.

I was dressed and ready to go when I heard Eric plodding around in his sleeping chamber, so I decided to go warm us up some bloods.

As he came into the kitchen, I already had his bottle warmed and I was holding it in one hand while I posed seductively.

“By the gods Sookie, you are really trying to kill me.” He whispered seductively in my ear as he took the bottle from my hand and set it down on the island. Okay so maybe we wouldn’t even make it to Fangtasia tonight.

He began nibbling on my ear and whispering sexy vulgarities. “Fuck Sookie, you look so fucking hot.” And I could feel that he was turned on, the evidence was poking my lower back.

I decided to turn on the sex kitten. I spun around to face him, his bulge nudging into my core. I pulled his hair so that his face was looking straight down to mine.

“You are mine Eric.” I growled and kissed him roughly. My fangs descended at the same time his did. I ripped his tank top off as we both were desperately clawing at each other. It was animalistic and passionate. As I was about to hike up my dress and push him into the ground, Eric roared out in pain.

I immediately stopped touching him, pulling away thinking that I had hurt him. He dropped to his knees still agonizing over whatever had happened to him.

“Eric? Eric! Talk to me, what did I do? What is wrong?” I asked, fully panic stricken.

“Pam!” was all he could manage to say. For a split second I was relieved that it wasn’t me that hurt him, but after that second passed, I became worried for Pam.

Eric was still writhing on the ground in utter agony; he was so incapacitated that he became immobile.

“What is happening to her? Please Eric!” I said desperately. I was so worried for Pam and I needed to get to her and help her. Eric wasn’t in any position to aid her, so I felt I was obligated, more so, I wanted to run to her.

“Silver, someone is draining her. She’s at her home.” Eric managed to splutter out. The way that Eric was reacting, it was almost as if he was also being detained by silver and drained of his blood as well.

I had no idea that a maker could feel the same amount of pain that their child did. When Bill was finally killed, I felt his pain, certainly, but from the looks of Eric’s reaction, it was nowhere close to what the maker felt.

I didn’t have time to think of a plan, I grabbed Eric’s keys and my sword and made my way out to the garage.

I heard Eric yelling at me to stay put, but I had no intention of listening to him. Pam needed help, and Eric was too incapacitated to be of any benefit.

Eric desperately pleaded with me and at one point demanded that I stay. “As your maker, I command you to stay in the house!” He ordered through gritted teeth. He was in such pain, I could see that. Good thing his commands didn’t work on me.

I knew he would be mad at me that I disobeyed his order, and I would deal with those consequences later, but I owed Pam.  She was my sister and friend and she would do the same for me.

I ran out to the garage and hopped in the Corvette. It took me only 5 minutes to get to Pam’s house, granted I was going 80 in through the residential streets. When I arrived at Pam’s house, I noticed a van in the driveway. I immediately recognized it as the plumbing company that we use at Fangtasia.

I parked in the neighbor’s yard, so that I could sneak up on her attackers. Grabbing my sword, I did a perimeter check on her house. Throwing out my mental radar, I needed to figure out who I was up against and how many. Humans I could take on easily, Weres might prove to be a challenge for me, but I could still kick their asses.

I heard the minds of 3 humans. 2 males and 1 female. Their thoughts were disturbing jumbled messes. Not only were they V dealers, but they were addicted. I gathered from their minds that they had been stalking Pam for weeks, and planning their attack. They planned to drain her of all her blood then stake her. I had to act quickly before they ended up killing her.

I decided rather than break in through the door, I would sneak up on them by teleporting into her home, the only problem with that was I couldn’t take my sword with me. I could take on humans though, so I wasn’t too worried about not having the sword.

As I teleported into her home, I ended up in her closet. I figured I would be out of sight in the closet.

I could hear Pam’s desperate screams as the silver netting they were using on her burned her down to the bone.

I couldn’t take it any longer and I opened the closet door to find the female assailant leaning over Pam laughing cruelly at her pain.

My blood boiled at the sight of the strung out bitch taking pleasure in my sister’s pain. I lunged at the bitch’s body knocking her to the ground. I reared back and punched her in the face, knocking her unconscious. I didn’t want to give her the change to come to, so I grabbed her head and twisted it breaking her neck, killing her instantly.

I picked myself up off the ground and kicked the bitch for good measure. “Don’t fuck with my family!” I said to the bitch’s corpse.

I ran over to Pam and removed the Vacu-tainers effectively stopping the blood from being drained, and as I went to remove the silver chains, the two male attackers came storming in.

I positioned myself in front of Pam’s body in a defensive position. Both attackers looked shocked at the scene in which they found. They both gasped at the dead body on the floor, and then looked back at me murderously.

One of the attackers pulled out a gun, and before I had the chance to lunge at him he was able to fire off a round. It hit me square in the chest.

I admit that it stung, and it took me a second to gather myself, but I was okay, bleeding profusely, but otherwise okay. I ripped the attackers arm off taking the gun with it. As the gun fell to the floor, I quickly grabbed it and fired off a shot killing the other attacker who was cowardly trying to escape.

I went back over the attacker whose arm I had ripped off and fired another round hitting him in the back of the head.

The bullet that had hit me was lodged in my sternum so I was not healing properly, but I was still able to function. I ran over to Pam and removed all of silver netting that was binding her.

The silver had singed so deep that the chains were now touching bone. It was horrifying to see Pam injured so badly, but she would heal. I started to offer her my blood, but I needed it for myself. I was bleeding out at an alarming rate because I wasn’t able to heal the bullet wound.

“Thank you sister.” Pam whispered. Pam and I both needed blood. Hopefully Eric would be over here soon.

I went to the bathroom to get a towel to try and stop the blood that was oozing out of my body, but that didn’t seem to help much. I felt myself getting weaker and weaker to the point that I could no longer stand. I fell to my knees in Pam’s bathroom and waited for Eric to come.

What felt like hours, was probably no more than a few minutes by the time Eric arrived.  I heard him take stock of the carnage, cursing in both English and Swedish. He attended to Pam first who needed some blood to speed up her healing process.

“Where is Sookie?” I heard Eric ask Pam almost frantically. “Bathroom.” Pam replied weakly.

Eric stormed into the bathroom, appraising me of my injuries. He looked paler than I had ever seen him before, probably because he had just given Pam so much of his blood.

I was lying of the floor with the blood soaked towel covering the bullet wound. Eric pulled the towel away to see the extent of the wound.

“It’s lodged in my sternum.” I said feebly.

Eric looked worried, mumbling something about how I was stubborn and infuriating. I smiled weakly at his words, knowing that he wasn’t really mad at me.

I heard Eric call Dr. Ludwig. Growling at her about how he cared nothing for the other patients she had to see.

One thing I really loved about Eric but was also kind of appalling, was that he really just didn’t give a shit about anyone other than himself, Pam and me.

While waiting for Dr. Ludwig, Eric sat by me caressing my hair and telling me it was going to be alright. Pam walked in a few minutes later with some bagged blood.

Eric fed me some and he drank some for himself. I didn’t take too much because it was just leaking out of my chest anyway.

Eric told Pam to go dispose of the humans, while he resumed caressing my hair. I was really regretting my slutty leather getup and my barely there thong that was now fully lodged up my crack. I would probably have to have Dr. Ludwig surgically remove it.

“Sookie, why did you disobey my order?” Eric asked calmly, but still deadly serious.

“She needed help.” Was all I could manage to say without too much pain.

He nodded in understanding and held my hand tightly as we waited for Dr. Ludwig to arrive.

Hearing the front door open, Eric ran up to see who it was, knowing that it was not Pam.

A few minutes later, Eric came into the room escorting Dr. Ludwig. “What has happened vampire?” Ludwig questioned.

“A vampire drainer shot Sookie. The bullet is lodged in her sternum.” Eric said succinctly.

“I see. Step away from her and let me do my job.” She ordered Eric. It was quite a sight to see a four and a half ft. tall 100lb. woman order a thousand year old Viking around. I had to stifle a laugh and Dr. Ludwig smirked at me knowing exactly what I was thinking.

Dr. Ludwig pulled out some medieval looking contraption from her bag. It looked like a mixture of pliers and wine key. Before I could protest, she dug the damned thing into my chest causing me to heave upwards in pain.

I bellowed out a guttural sound and Eric rushed to my side. “What the fuck are you doing to her?” Eric demanded impatiently.

“Back off Vampire!” Dr. Ludwig warned again.

As the bullet was removed from my chest a fresh onslaught of blood came pouring from the wound.

“You are her maker, are you not?” Dr. Ludwig questioned Eric.

“Not her blood maker, no.” Eric replied regretfully.

“All the same, I suppose. Give her some blood. She should heal within a few minutes.” Dr. Ludwig replied.

“This is the child you acquired Viking?” Ludwig asked. She said acquired, as if I was chattel property.

“Yes, she is.” Eric responded proudly.

“You need to form some kind of a blood tie with her. You can either bond with her, or “re-make” her so to speak. “ Dr. Ludwig suggested. I honestly had no idea what either of those two things she suggested entailed, but to be honest, I wanted a blood tie with Eric.

Eric nodded at her in agreement. “If you wish to re-make her, call me and I will supervise the process.” Dr. Ludwig said.

By the time their conversation was over, my wound had healed. I sat up looking around the room. There was blood everywhere. Poor Pam. Her carpet was completely soaked through, there was no way to clean that up, she was just going to have to replace it.

“I’ll send you the bill Viking.” Dr. Ludwig said and left. Eric picked me up and carried me to the bed. He tore open his wrist and put it up to my mouth.

“You look fucking sexy in that dress covered in blood.” Eric said as I pulled mouthfuls of blood from his wrist. He tasted amazing and I had to force myself to not re-open his wrist and keep drinking from him. He needed blood to though; he was looking too pale for my comfort.

Eric pulled me close and kissed me roughly. He needed to feel close to me. The attack on Pam and subsequently me was too close for comfort for Eric. He needed some reassurances, and I was glad to oblige him.

“Thank you for saving Pam.” Eric whispered into my lips. As he kissed me again, this time I parted my lips allowing his tongue to massage my own. I wanted him, but this wasn’t right. I wanted him in our home, in our bed.

I pulled away from him and said, “You and Pam are my family now. I would do anything for you.”

Eric looked at me as if I had just said some magic words that he had been longing to hear.

“Sookie. I want to bond with you.” Eric stated definitively as he cradled my face in his hands.

“I want to bond with you too.” I replied in the same tone. I would need to ask Eric what all the bond would entail, not that it mattered much, I was fully prepared for anything if it meant being that much more close to Eric.

Just as we were about to start kissing again, Pam came back into the room interrupting us by unnecessarily clearing her throat.

We both simultaneously looked at Pam with an annoyed expression. “Pam, how did they manage to find out where you rest?” Eric asked angrily. I think he was madder that Pam cock blocked him.

“I don’t know Eric, Sookie killed them before we could question them.” Pam replied in a seemingly uninterested tone.

“There was no need to question them.” I replied feeling the need to defend my actions. “Telepath, remember.” I said tapping on my temple.

“They work for the plumbing company that we contract at Fangtasia. They’ve been stalking Pam for weeks, watching her every move.  They don’t belong to any sophisticated cell network of drainers, they are just a bunch of low-life V addicts. They got lucky, that’s all.” I said as Pam and Eric listened carefully.

“Pam, your resting place has been compromised, you cannot stay here. You will come live with Sookie and I until you find something else.” Eric stated matter of factly. There was arguing with Eric when it came to the safety of himself or his progenies.

We all gathered ourselves up and drove home. I had to admit that tonight was the first night I years that I felt like I truly had a family and that I finally fit in. My seduction of Eric would just have to wait for another night, but I am a patient vampire and when the time is right, I will know it. 


	17. Eternity with You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SPOV

I wanted to be near Eric when he rose for the evening; well actually I wanted to be on Eric when he rose for the evening. I had plans to lay my heart on the line and hopefully start the bond with him. I also didn’t want Pam around when that happened.

So I wrote Pam a note and taped it to her forehead.

_Pam,_

_Please see yourself out ASAP. Our maker and I have things to discuss, and by discuss I mean that I plan on seducing him._

_Kisses,_

_Sookie_

I made my way back down to his resting place. This time, I was not going to wear some silly leather getup, nor was I going to wear a thong. I grabbed one of Eric’s tank tops and left on my regular everyday boy shorts.

I wanted to tell Eric that he meant more to me than anyone else had ever meant, I wasn’t ready to admit to loving him, but I was completely open to the possibility of loving him.

Eric would be up in a few minutes, so I straddled him and began to place open mouth kisses all over his naked body. He was completely sexy and utterly _mine_. My fangs ran out and they were itching to be buried inside Eric. His blood was addicting to me, and I wanted to taste him, but I also wanted him to taste me.

“Is this a dream?” Eric said seductively as he rose for the night.

“God, I hope not, otherwise I am going to wake up incredibly frustrated.” I replied. In fact I had woken up sexually frustrated one too many times in the past thanks to my Viking dreams.

Eric pulled my hips up higher on his body so that he could caress me better.

“You look fucking sexy in my clothes.” I felt sexy in his clothes. Something about being enveloped in his scent made my body heat rise a few thousand degrees.

I was torn between ravaging his body and having the discussion that we needed to have. Ultimately I figured the discussion would inevitably lead to the ultimate seduction, so I moved myself off of him and went to sit next to him on the bed.

Eric, however, had other things in mind.

“Where do you think you are going?” he asked, well growled as he held me in place.

“We need to talk.” I said.

“Sookie, I meant what I said last night. I want to bond with you. I want you, all of you. I know that you are still healing, but we are meant to be and I will wait forever for you.” Eric said sincerely. I smiled at his words. Not that I would make him wait forever, just another 5 minutes…maybe.

“And I meant what I said last night too. You are mine and I want to bond with you as well. But I think you misunderstand me, Eric. I _am_ healed; I have accepted the things that have happened to me. My past does not dictate my future, and believe me when I say that you are my future. You are the one that saved me. I want to be with you in every possible way two vampires can be with one another.”

There was so much more that I wanted to say, but at the risk of being overly sentimental, I just decided to show Eric that I meant what I said.

I placed my lips on his in a very deliberate, sensual way, punctuating my words. Eric, grabbed a handful of my hair and moved his lips in motion with mine. It was not rough or animalistic, it was slow, sensual, meaningful.

My tongue slipped into his mouth slowly dancing with his. I took an unnecessary breath, taking in his unique scent relegating it to my memory and simultaneously causing my libido to skyrocket.

I pulled away from his lips trailing my mouth down his cheek and landing on his neck. My tongue darted out; licking and sucking the spot on his neck where his pulse would be were he alive. I lingered there for a while, silent asking for permission.

Eric grunted and rubbed my breasts through my shirt urging me on, but I wanted, no needed to hear him say the words.

“Take me into you Sookie, drink me.” He said so low and deep that only a vampire would be able to hear the spoken words.

My fangs ran out and I took inhaled his scent one more time committing this moment to my memory.  My overly sensitive fangs dug into his neck and I took the first mouthful of his blood and simultaneously soaking my panties. His blood tasted like pure bliss. I was so lost in the sensation of having him inside of me, that I barely registered the fact that he had also bit into my neck.

We were both grinding on each other and there was no doubt in my mind that the wetness I was feeling between us belonged to me.

His free hand snaked into my panties and he began to gently massage my slit. I wanted him inside of me in that very instant.

I reluctantly pulled away from his neck, licking the bite marks I had left as he did the same to me.

Our eyes met in a brief minute of unadulterated lust and longing. And I could feel the evidence of his need between my thighs.

In that instance, Eric tore my panties leaving absolutely nothing standing between him and I. I needed to have him. It was a need so strong that I almost couldn’t stand it. He reached between us and began to massage me again, but I needed more than that. I reached down and took his hand in mine and together we lined up his sex with mine.

Lowering myself onto him at a painfully slow pace while we both stared into each other’s eyes, there was no doubt that there was love between us.

I couldn’t take my eyes off of him, but the sensation of him being inside of me made me gasp. He felt like home to me, and I knew I was right where I was supposed to be.

“Oh fuck Sookie, you feel so goddamn amazing.” Eric grunted and raised his arms to grab onto the headboard. I took that as my cue to start moving. I braced my hands on his chest and started to move slowly up and down on his cock. He was a very big man, and I was certain that I would not be able to take him all in if I was a human, but as it stood, he filled me completely and it was goddamn amazing like he said.

He brought his hands to my hips, spurring me to move faster, before I knew it I was moving at vampire speed, riding his cock in complete utopia. Eric sat upright and I knew I was so incredibly close. I could feel my walls starting to pulsate, and I needed to have more of him inside of me while I was riding him.

I bent my head down and bit his neck again, taking in a few mouthfuls of his blood. He did the same to me and before I knew it we were both coming together and drinking each other.

It was the single most profound moment of my life. I could feel everything that Eric was feeling. Euphoria.

There were no words that needed to be said between us, because we could feel what each other felt. The bond was strumming to life and although we still needed one more exchange to make it permanent, the feelings running between us were the same and they were extremely intense.

Eric reached up and gently brushed the hair out of my face. I didn’t want to detach myself from him, god I wanted to be right where I was forever. This is where we belonged. This was right.

I reluctantly pulled away. Eric grabbed me and tucked me into his body so that we were face to face and our foreheads were touching each other.

Again, no words necessary, we just stared into each other, bathing in the glory of the newly formed bond.

I don’t know how long we lay that way, but it must have been hours. I wanted him again though, and through the bond I could feel his lust as well.

Eric began kissing my lips and this time I couldn’t hold back the raw animalistic need that I had for him.

Eric pulled my body underneath his and we kissed fiercely clawing, biting, grabbing each others hair, then suddenly he entered me. The movement was so fast, so sudden that I hardly had time to think about it.

He pounded into me at vampire speed and the need I had for him was ever-present.

“Shit Eric. Fuck. Me. Ohmygod! Eric!” I screamed out. To the outside observer, you would think that this round of fucking was violent, and honestly it was, but truthfully it felt so fucking good.

As he was pounding into me at vampire speed, Eric yanked my head to the side and bit hard into my breast. I ground my fangs into his shoulder at the same time and the sensation was otherworldly. Indescribable. It was like a burst of light hit us both and the sheer permanence of the bond was made tangible by the sensations that it was causing.

We were forever one and as we came together, we were both shouting each other’s name. That very moment made all the suffering that I had gone through all worth it.

As we came down from our bonding high, both in awe of the feelings solidifying between us, Eric was the one to break the silence.

“You are amazing Sookie Stackhouse.” Eric said as he caresses the rogue strands of hair away from my face.

“You are amazing Sheriff.” I said seductively. I knew that Eric loved it when I called him Sheriff.

“This, us, we are forever Sookie. Only death can break what is between us. What he have transcends and human form of commitment. I am yours as you are mine.” Eric’s piercing gaze punctuated the levity of his words. Nothing is forever and everything ends, but hopefully we would be able to last, if we stuck together.

“Forever.” I whispered as I entwined Eric’s fingers with mine. “My maker. My lover. My bonded.”


End file.
